AARP Muscle Babe

Irene Patricia "Patti" O’Grady EVANS 1929-2009

My mom, Patti Evans (age 79), lived in a senior housing apartment in my town. I saw or spoke to her almost every day. When she didn’t answer her phone, I drove over to her place. What a horror to peek in the window and see her lying in an unnatural position on the floor. I didn’t have a key and couldn’t get in. Panic! I called 911 and they were there in less than 5 minutes. They got in but wouldn’t let me in. I knew it was bad at that point. A few minutes later one of their staff came out and said she was dead, had been a few hours ago she passed away as she was very cold and stiff. They had a pastor that goes with them on calls like this; I guess it’s a good idea but all I wanted to do was get inside to see my mom one last time. She wanted direct cremation so there would be no last good byes at the funeral with a casket and all that. I had to beg, telling them I used to work in a morgue and did my fair share of tagging and bagging bodies (true story). They finally let me in to say goodbye but even then I only got a moment and couldn’t touch her as they were waiting for the medical examiner to come. Still makes me sad and angry at the same time to think of it!

The funeral was last Saturday, April 25th. We had an Irish wake as her full maiden name was Irene Patricia O’Grady. Her great-grandparents were from Louisburg, County Mayo, Ireland and she was always proud of being an O’Grady. Had bagpipes play "Amazing Grace", one song was "Danny Boy" (her family’s favorite) and another was a vocal version of the "Irish Blessing". We finished the service with "76 Trombones" from her all time favorite movie, "The Music Man" which caused a stir in the chapel. Then we cranked up the Irish music and opened up bottles of Harp, Irish Red and Guinness beer. Yummy food was served and enjoyed by all. The Iowa folks who showed up were a little surprised by it all as the family laughed, danced and sang happy tunes at the funeral. After the traditional funeral folks left, we watched Monty Python’s "The Meaning of Life" on the funeral home’s large screen TV and laughed even more. My mom loved that silly bunch of guys and watched them for decades. It was a fitting end to her service with the skit on death with the Grim Reaper skipping his way to heaven with deceased folks following in their cars.

Needless to say, I will be putting off my workouts for the next few weeks. I have to clean out her apartment by myself and go through all her papers plus her finances to sort out. My hubby can only help move stuff on the weekends but maybe we can get a lot done this next Sat. and Sunday. I’ve been going over there every day, sorting and throwing out bags of stuff. It is all time consuming and emotionally draining. I’m exhausted every night when I go to bed from all the stress. I wish my brothers and sister were here to help but they all live too far away. Two of them didn’t even come to her funeral due to job conflicts. I know they can’t help it but it would have been nice to have all her children there for the funeral.

To all of you who still have a mom on the planet, give her a big hug and kiss for me! Mine was a great mother who loved me for who I was, who always smiled and laughed through life, and she will missed by her family and friends.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, April 29th, 2009 at 8:47 am and is filed under Training. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.