Wendy’s BodyBlog

For some reason, I am having a really difficult time resizing the pics so I can post them here. Little frustrating. Below are links to my Facebook page that links to the albums… I can only post 60 pics per album… Also, that last post wasn’t supposed to post yet… Guess I hit the wrong button. So a funny story last night is that my friend Brianna was surprised that I was tearing up the dance floor. Yes, yes, I am reserved and shy and blahblahblah but I CAN shake my booty just as hard and as good as anyone else! Put me on a dance floor, and it’s likely that I won’t get off till the music stops!

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=37024&l=5cbf1&id=757829698

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=37028&l=bd322&id=757829698

Things have been fairly hairy over the last few days. Have been pretty stressed out. Ok, very, very stressed out. On Wednesday my chest felt so tight from anxiety and stress that I had to really focus on my breathing for a couple hours - shallow breathing only makes anxiety worse. But, I made it through. I was also feeling pretty down as a result, I think, of being so overwhelmed. So I ate chocolate every day (many, many pieces), and after getting down on myself for a few days, I realized that it was not just the eating area that I was having problems in, but school and work too. Struggling to stay on top of everything with school. I was short with my clients, too, and didn’t feel effective. After I realized that, it was easier to get back on track with clean eating. I did manage to do cardio 6 times this week, though!

I also had an interview for a job on campus. I think I would fit in really well there, as I seemed to get along with the women very well, but one of the interviewers mentioned that I am graduating in May, so they wouldn’t have that much time with me. Very true. I should know by the middle of this week. I think I interviewed really well, but I don’t think I got it because of the fact that I am graduating soon. Which is ok. If that happens, then I am going to ask work for another client, and then I at least can maintain more steady hours when someone cancels, which, as you know, happens quite a lot.

Anyyywayyyy, so yesterday I went to a wedding in Qunicy, California, about an hour and a half from where I am, and it was sooo much fun! It was definitely the most fun wedding I have ever been to. It helped that the girl getting married is one of my good friends, and three of my other good girl friends were there as well. None of us brought our men (we planned it that way), so it was the four of us laughing hysterically at silly girly things. I honestly don’t remember the last time I had such a great time.

The wedding was held on a ranch, so the ceremony and dinner were outside.  As a girl who was born and raised in northern Nevada, I really admired the theme and the location. It was absolutely beautiful, and the leaves are changing. The best part, I think, was at the end of the ceremony when the bride and groom kiss, and across from this pond, a herd of horses gallopped by. It was planned, of course. The sight was spectacular. On the ranch was a bar/saloon area where everyone headed off for dancing. I stayed a lot later than I had planned on. I was tempted to stay the night, as some of my friends were staying there, but am glad that I decided to make the trek late last night. Below are some pics… I am off to eat breakfast and then homework… Back to the grind! And next weekend, I finally get to see John, after five weeks! I can’t wait! We are going to Palm Springs to meet up with two of John’s sisters, brother in law, and kids…. Should be a good time, then, too! I think I will survive the semester with my sanity intact so long as I have some fun things to look forward to…

Yes, that is me right now. CRABBYYYY!!!! I am just feeling really overwhelmed with school right now. I have never felt this way with school before.  Here the semester is, more than half over, and I feel like I haven’t gotten much done. And I am frustrated because it doesn’t seem like the faculty are quite understanding the difficulties that we as a class are having applying to the Institutional Review Board to conduct human research. For example, I asked one professor about a specific format for a literature review, and she said she would talk about it the next week. Well, the next week came, and here was her advice: You just have to write it.

I kid you not. And when students asked her for specifics, she said, well, there is no one right way. Well, hell yeah there is! Because if we do it the "wrong way" she will let us know! Here’s the thing, too: There are different ways to write a literature review, but they all include the same basic information.

And in that same class, I asked her if we could go step by step through the Institutional Review Board application, and she said, well, so and so from this department is going to come in and talk about it. Well, so and so knows what will and won’t get passed, but she is not going to go through it with us step by step.
We have never done an IRB app before, we have never seen one before till this semester, and she is acting so non-chalant like it is not a big deal. So I asked her to bring in specific examples, which I feel she should have done quite some time ago.

And in another class, this instructor wanted us to write an assessment. No big deal; I do those all the time for my internship, so it really wasn’t a big deal for me. HOWEVER there were quite a few students who have never had to write one before, including the mental status exam and five-axis diagnosis (yes, I am using jargon, sorry), and she did not teach it,  but then she dings those students for not having the right format or the right language. Oh, and she wants us to apply theory to our writing of a treatment plan, but guess what? She NEVER talks about theory AT ALL, has never mentioned how theory is applied, and she hasn’t been exactly direct either in answering questions about it. In the meantime, we spent about $200 on books for her class, and I don’t think she has ever even looked at them.

I’m so tired of this game of "Where’s the Prize?" And then we try, and fall flat on our faces and they say, well, gee, I wonder why that happened. It is just absolutely ridiculous how disconnected the professors are from the students. And trust me, it is not like we don’t tell them. It’s that THEY DON’T GET IT!!! They don’t think that, oh yeah, maybe these guys haven’t been exposed to this before. Maybe I need to get off my a** and actually TEACH!!! I do have two other professors who are absolutely wonderful and are very clear about what they want in assignments and actually take the teaching part of their positions very seriously. But from my experience, most of the professors in our department (at least those who teach our classes) don’t really give a crap about teaching. Their minds are so wrapped up in their research and themselves that they don’t step back to see the big picture.

And so some of us have resorted to asking the professors who give a crap things like, how do you apply theory to a treatment plan, because we sure as heck aren’t getting it from the other professor. And some of us have resorted to somehow scrounging up examples of IRB applications from past students or other professors.

And I wonder why I am so stressed about this semester. What is already a stressful semester, some professors are only making more stressful. Ok, I am done complaining, and I feel better now.

All that being said, I did write my training plan for next month…while in one of my useless classes… At least I did something productive in class!

Here is my stab at it… It is a 5 day split, and the exercises will stay the same throughout the month except that the sets/reps will be different. First week is 3×10, then 6×6, 5×8, and 4×12. any thoughts?

Legs

Squat, DB, Wide Stance

BB forward/reverse lunge

Walking lunge

Single les press

Leg extensions

Back/Bis

Pullups superset with Bicep DB curl, alternating, with twist

Seated Row superset with Bicep curl, wide grip, EZ bar

Lat pulldown superset with Hammer curls

Bent over DB row

Reverse flyes

Chest/Abs/Tris

DB Chest Press superset with French press

Incline BB chest press

Incline DB fly superset with hanging leg raise

Cable crossover superset with woodchop (abs)

Cable crunch superset with tricep press

Legs

Deadlift - DB

Deadlift - BB

Smith Machine Squat with legs in front

Reverse lunge, BB

Cable kickback

Leg curls

Shoulders/Abs

BB overhead press superset with V-ups to fatigue

Arnold press superset with with plank for 60 sec

Upright Row superset with toe touches

Lateral raises

Front raises

My bf pointed that my blog entitled "Gripe" depicts him as a fat slob who sits on the couch eating pizza and drinking beer. Well, ok, so he DOES do the eating pizza and drinking beer bit (It’s true, John! Admit it!), but anyone who has read my blog knows that my bf is an accomplished athlete–he is into all things outdoors AND outrageous, like running 100 miles all at once, which he did this last summer. He is just not a gym rat like I am and nor is he into eating squeaky clean. So, to correct this, he wanted me to write a blog praising the virtues of his body (hence the title Ode to Adonis), an idea at which I laughed–really hard! It was a fun conversation! Can you just imagine me writing a blog singing him praises about his body??? LOL! (Gonna have to keep dreaming on this one, John!)

Anyway… my day has been very long. I finally fell asleep last night around 12 or 12:30 and was wide awake with stress at 6:30. That was the start of my day. And I was supposed to go out to lunch with some friends, but canceled that (I like to blame the economy for my financial woes).  So I went to the gym and spent a gosh-awful amount of time there. I think I got there around 9:30 or 9:45 and didn’t leave till 12. But I had a really good workout. Chest, abs, tris, bis.  And then I did an awesome, hi-intensity functional workout. It went something like this:

30 of each or hold for one minute, depending on the exercise: squat jumps, pushups, jumping jacks, barbell rows, wall sit, french press, lunge jumps, mountain climbers, crab walk, bicycles, plank hold. And then I did 5 30-second sprints on the treadmill at 10% incline, 7 MPH.  Did ALL of that three times through! I was thoroughly exhausted at the end! Phew! And I have been hungry all day as a result, too!
Oh, and the trainer at the gym who introduced me to a bodybuilder girl today introduced me to a guy bodybuilder who is 60! Well, he looks phenomenal for 60! He arrived at the gym at the same time I did, then left the gym around the same time as well! I was a little — uh, not sure what the word is–embarrassed? I don’t know. I am a shy person and like to stay anonymous whenever possible, and I don’t like being the center of attention, so it was a little uncomfortable for me when all I really wanted to do was work out. (Strange considering all of this and then thinking about the fact that I want to compete!). I think the trainer noticed that too because later he came up to me and apologized.  It is nice to know other people who are into the same things as I am, but at the same time, my gym time is me time, when I can be alone with myself and my thoughts (or, in my case at the gym, the fire burning in my muscles, LOL!).

One last bit of news: For now I am not going to do Cathy Savage. Maybe I will pick her up again in December or January, maybe not. Part of the reason for this is financial–I pay almost $100/month between my gym membership and the Cathy Savage program, which is a LOT on my graduate student budget! And, as I’ve mentioned on this site before, my hours at my current position are just not stable.

Sooo, it looks as though GJ and I will be in the same boat, designing our own programs! I think I have actually learned quite a bit since starting the program back in February or March, so I should be able to write fairly decent training schedules. And I can really focus on the areas I want to, like that glute-ham tie-in and my overall legs. And I have a good understanding of the diet, too, so I am not worried about that bit.  Sooo, we shall see how it goes. I have a feeling my workouts will probably be more intense than Cathy’s (at least my prior attempts to writing a schedule have showed as much), so we’ll see how that turns out, LOL! Also, I thought for a while that I wanted to switch my look from a figure gal to the more fitness model type, but after reading in an article that it takes about one year to really see your progress on a specific program, I decided to stick with going for the figure type look. What can I say for myself? I love the look of the girls in Oxygen and Muscle & Fitness Hers. Those girls for the most part are definitely figure girls. I will of course continue with my cardio-whorish ways but emphasize more high intensity cardio.

Points for today:

Clean eating (ate a lot but ate clean): 2 points

1 new friend: 1 point

Responded to 4 blogs: 8 points

Read for half hour: 1 point

HIIT: 3 points

Abs: 2 points

Weights: 1 point

Group activity (met my friend at the library again!): 2 points

Think that about covers it. Total points today: 20

I can’t believe it is almost 11 PM here, and I have been working on my thesis since about 4:30…. I don’t feel like I have gotten that much done. Actually, now that I am thinking about it, I have. I read ALL of the articles, pulled out the main points, and organized the pile of articles on my bedroom floor. Okkkk, the really important ones go into a big binder so at least I know where they are. Except now I can’t find an important article… It has to be here somewhere…

Anyway, today was good. The best part of my day: I get to see my boy in two weeks! I am SOOO excited. By the time we see each other, it will have been five loooonnnggg weeks! I miss him!!!
I was also productive today, so that is always good. I also had a looong workout today. I am working hard on my legs, glutes, and that elusive glute-ham tie-in.  It will be mine, damnit! I also met with a client this morning for a few hours. Being with this particular client always reminds me of why I love working with kids: they are just sooo fun! And they have no pretenses! I can be completely goofy, and whereas adults would give me a funny look, kids laugh, and we bond over being silly together. And it’s so amazing watching kids grow and just blossom and form their own identities and personalities.

Sometimes I wonder if what I am doing is helping at all. This line of work can be difficult, because we don’t always get to see the impact we have (or don’t have!). But this week I received confirmation on how I am doing with my 4 yr old client. A couple weeks ago, I made her clean up her living/playing area by herself, and boy, was it a mess!!!! She kept saying, "Oh my GOD, I have to clean this all by MYSELF!" but she finished, and when she was done I PRAISED her–told her how good she did and how good she is at cleaning up after herself and she is getting to be such a big girl. I went on and on about it. That is one area that I am supposed to be working with her on–her basic living skills. So there were a couple other times that I had her clean up her play area. Every time I go over there, it is such a disaster! So yesterday, when I got there, I told her that we needed to clean up her area, and she said, Let’s do that before we play!!! Haha! I LOVED that! And she did it all by herself again, with me doing my usual thing, which is praising her and pointing out things that still needed to be put away. So later that day, she goes up to her guardian and proudly says, I am good at picking up!

She actually listened to me all those times I praised her ridiculously! Kids are sponges. AND they live up to the expectations that you set for them, whether they are low or high!

Anyway…off to bed…

Points for today:

1 hour cardio: 2 points

1 hour weights: 2 points

Clean eating: 2 points

1 new friend: 1 point

10 Blogs responded to (I actually think it was more but I didn’t keep track): 20 points

Two pics posted: 4 points

Solved Vt Dad’s riddle: 2 points

Read for 3.5 hours (phew!): 7 points…

And I think I should get at LEAST 10 points for working so dang hard on homework today, LOL!
Today’s points:  40– WOW! That’s a whole heck of a lot of points!

I’ll add everything together later.

…From working on my thesis project!!!  Yes, what an exciting social life I have, eh? Doing homework on a Saturday night… Anyway, found these pics online and wanted to share. Spirit points for me!

I need to gripe about a blog I saw on here. Won’t say who, and no, I did not respond to this person’s blog because it was about that person’s marriage, and I didn’t feel like I should intrude; on the other hand, this person did post it online, so that opens him/her up to criticism.

So it is very  obvious that this person is unhappy with his/her marriage as a result of the spouse not being that into fitness, although it does seem like the spouse is into fitness, just not as much as this person would like. Anyway, the comment said something about wanting a relationship where both were into fitness/figure/bodybuilding and hoping to have that one day.

Why did this bother me? Because it just seemed sooo insensitive to the signifcant other. Yes, the S. O. probably already knows this person feels that way, but to let the whole world know on one’s bodyblog? What a humilitating experience for the S.O! I would be both furious and hurt if John ever did anything like that to me. It’s one thing to gripe to friends or even to say on here that you are in a fight with your s.o. and want to knock your s.o.’s block off, but to inadvernently say that what the other person offers is not enough is a whole other story.

And this also made me wonder about the qualities that the s.o offers that are NOT fitness based. Sure I would love it if John were into all this fitness madness, too, and came with me to the gym for hours on end and we ate the same bland food together… It would be fun to compete together, and maybe do a photo shoot together…. And I wish he took better care of himself–not spending his life at his company, exercised more, ate more whole foods than crap out of a box. BUT that being said, even if he WERE into fitness the way I am, that would only be a bonus, as that would NOT be the reason that I love him. I love him because of his adventurous spirit, his spontaneity and goofiness, dependability, his work ethic and independent mind, the simple fact that he is a good person.  And we are very compatible.

Just to say that you want one type of relationship, based on one common goal like fitness or figure, is idealizing something that you DON’T have while at the same time, overlooking everything else that your s.o. does have. Which is a BAD MOVE TO MAKE!!! Especially in a marriage, where you are in it for the long term. People’s priorities change. People change. Stuff happens.
I think it can be easy to lose sight of who the other person really is–like when both are stressed or are fighting at 2 in the morning for some reason neither of you really understands…. But at the end of the day, it is important to step back away from whatever grievances you have against each other and remember and appreciate the other person for who they are and what they offer–not who you want them to be.

I had a good day today. Of course because it is Friday, I am absolutely exhausted, but it was a good day nonetheless. I met this woman at the gym who is into bodybuilding. Okkkk, well she WAS into bodybuilding for several years but now she says she wants to switch over to figure because she doesn’t think that a woman can body build and be competitive without the use of steroids and whatever all else is used. But I didn’t know this about her at first, and I thought she was a figure girl, and she is a BIG woman–not fat at all, but tall and just built–she was doing 35lb. dumbbell curls, after all!. Anyway, at that point I was thinking, crap, I have NO business wanting to do figure if that is what the women look like, offseason or not! She gave me her phone number so we can meet up and I can pick her brain! I am excited, as she is the first figure/fitness girl I have met in real life! Other than this site, I have pretty much gone it alone…

I need to get to bed, and I still have laundry to do for tomorrow (I should get more workout clothes–I have to do laundry 2 times per week!)

Ate clean: 2 points

HIIT: 3points - This was interesting as I left my sports bra at home and had to wear my regular one!   Lucky me, I don’t need much support!
Read 1 hour: 2 points

Responded to 5 blogs: 10 points

1 friend made: 1 point

Weight session: 1 point

Today’s points: 19 points!

Well, I am absolutely pooped today. Well, not today but right now… It is almost my bedtime!  I decided to try to find other work. I love my clients and have grown very attached to some of them, but at the same time, the hours are not panning out. Literally every other week, someone cancels (or more than one person, like last week!). And my schedule is not so flexible that I can conveniently squeeze that person into another time slot. The frustrating thing, too, is that I can’t ask for other clients because they are kids and therefore in school during the day. So the times that I have open don’t coincide with their school schedules.

I did submit my resume for a 20 hour position as a community liaison working with autistic kids and their families. Basically intake stuff, scheduling, following up with families, etc. Very social work-y! 20 hours would be hard for me to fit in during the M-F work week in addition to my internship and classes, but next semester, I will only have one day of classes, so that will really free up my schedule. Anyway, I have an interview there on the 22nd…. We shall see! Plus, it is decent pay. Well, my job now is decent pay as well, but the hours are somewhat sporadic.

I also think that I will stick with Cathy Savage as my coach until I graduate and get a "real" job… It’s better to play it safe with $$$ while in grad school.
Ok, need to get ready for tomorrow then off to bed.

Clean eating: 2 points

Group exercise: 2 points

Reading 1.5 hours: 3 points

3 pounds lost (Yup, three pounds!!!!): 6 points

Total points: 13 points.

Total points to date:  257

Yesterday I was pretty down in the dumps…I just get like that sometimes–it is usually a culmination of stress, fatigue, and some sadness. Se I just felt weepy all day, but I got through the day alright. I fell asleep on my bed at 8 last night. I wasn’t "in bed" but thinking about reading my nopel when I fell asleep. Fatigue really takes a toll on me. Plus, I have had depression since I was 15 or 16, so that doesn’t help–that’s really probably the underlying reason for my feeling that dumpy from time to time. I’ve noticed, too, that if I don’t exercise for more than 2 days, I get to feeling pretty sad, and I took Monday and Tuesday off. At any rate, with a good night’s rest and some vigorous exercise today, I am feeling much better.

Oh, and I have to rant about something. I was on the  treadmill today walking, waiting for the abs class to start. Silly me, I picked up Vogue to pass the time on the treadmill, and right there in a Letter to the Editor was a comment from some reader about how she didn’t think athletic people could be beautiful, but then she saw the spread featuring athletes and that changed her mind. (Apparently there was some feature in Vogue that had athletic people in it). My first thought was, why do I even bother looking at trash like Vogue? And then my second thought was, WTF?! And the cultural "ideal" woman is beautiful?! Twigs for arms and legs and a huge Bobble head?! There is so much in our culture that reinforces this feminine ideal that is not healthy or natural. And then these women (actually GIRLS–most models are girls) are revered. And what happens? They die from anorexia or bulimia. Ok, not all of them, but enough of them to know that our cultural ideal is f****d up!!!

Anyway… I think my pasta is done cooking, so am off.

Points

Weights session: 1 point

HIIT: 3 points

Abs session: 2 points

Clean eating: 2 points

Read for 1.5 hours today: 3 points

Responded to 8 blogs in the last couple days: 16 points

Total points: 27 points… I’ll add these to my total overall points later