vince_andrich’s BodyBlog

By Vince Andrich

If I hadn’t made me
I would’ve been made somehow
if I hadn’t assembled myself
I’d have fallen apart by now

Incubus, Title Song to the CD Make Yourself

I have no doubt that regular readers of inspiring articles and blogs on bodybuilding.com seek to break out of the norm and become something special. Nevertheless, no matter how many victories you have had in the game of life, or kudos for a job well done, there is a deep secret that lies inside each of us. The secret is this; we are all prone to harbor self-doubt or low self-esteem to varying degrees.

In fact, just two days ago I watched an Oscar winning actress state that although she has many successes; the failures or misses are her most memorable. When I heard this, I immediately wanted to write about the topic, because I knew that when we’re too hard on ourselves, our willingness to try new things, learn and live life to the fullest comes to a grinding halt.

The Seeds of Self-Doubt

According to many researchers, low-self esteem is a common barrier that once recognized as a learned pattern of behavior, is much easier to minimize. Now, just stop and think about it, we spend most of our young impressionable years learning not to think or speak too highly of our selves or we are labeled a braggart. Then as we enter peer influenced social environments. such as throughout school, we must seek approval to make sure we are good enough. You know the deal, be popular, cool and hip, because the alternative is a painful lack of self-worth or esteem.

Over time, people with chronic low self-esteem often sabotage their own success and happiness because they do not think they are worthy of anything good. In essence, they’ve become conditioned to doubt themselves.

Where Does Self-Esteem Come From?

Our self-esteem develops and evolves throughout our lives, as we build an image of ourselves through our experiences with different people and activities. Experiences during our childhood play a significant role in the shaping of our basic self-esteem. For example, as we progress from toddlers to young adults our successes (and failures), and how others treated us, begin to shape our inner self. The most influential people shaping our basic self-esteem are the members of our immediate family, by teachers, coaches, and our friends (peer group).

Distorted Faces of Low Self-Esteem

According to researchers at the University of Texas at Austin, most of us have an image of what low self-esteem looks like, but it is not always so easy to recognize. Here are three common faces that low self-esteem may wear:

• The Impostor: acts happy and successful, but is really terrified of failure. This person lives with the constant fear that she or he will be “found out.” Not surprising is the fact that this person needs continuous successes to maintain the mask of positive self-esteem, which may lead to problems with perfectionism, procrastination, competition, and burn out.
• The Rebel: acts like the opinions or good will of others - especially people who are important or powerful - don’t matter. The rebel lives with constant anger about not feeling €˜good enough’. This same person continuously needs to prove that others’ judgments and criticisms don’t hurt, which may lead to problems like blaming others excessively, breaking rules or laws, or fighting authority.
• The Loser: acts helpless and unable to cope with the world and waits for someone to come to the rescue. This same person may use self-pity or indifference as a shield against fear of taking responsibility for changing his or her life. The loser also looks constantly to others for guidance, which can lead to such problems as lacking assertivenes, under-achievement, and excessive reliance on others in relationships.

Do you get the message?

Your self-esteem is your judgment. It is NOT the people around you, not your Parents or your Employers, but ONE HUNDRED PERCENT YOURS.

So all the excuses about what has happened in the past, and all the actions of other people, have nothing to do with your self worth.

Therefore, the simple route to raising your self-valuation is to make a new decision. That decision is to find new information on which to base your self-esteem.

Better still, base your self-valuation on a new understanding within yourself. The understanding that you do not have to do what others think is cool or hip in order to be worthy. You are the ultimate judge of your worth, and the key that unlocks the door to happiness is to pursue the avenues that make you feel good about yourself. By focusing on these areas, no matter how perfect you are, or well you do, the journey has enough meaning to propel your self worth to new heights.

To Make Yourself, You Must Think for Yourself

As the lyrics from the song above reveal, if you don’t assemble yourself, you’ll fall apart. And if you want to Make Yourself you will need to begin thinking for yourself, which is likely one of the hardest things to do, but the ONLY way to gain back any lost self-esteem. Read on and you easily see the benefits of thinking for yourself.

The great artist Rembrandt did not paint the same world as Picasso, and, in general, no world-class artist became a “classic” by doing what somebody else had already done, or even what everybody else in his/her own era did. The great businessman Henry Ford did not get rich copying Fulton’s steamboat; he made a car so cheap that anybody could afford. Finally, Howard Hughes produced movies that nobody else would have dared to attempt, but he was not deterred by his peers, and then went on to revolutionize the airline industry.

We all need to conscious of what breaks down our self-esteem, and how we can breakthrough barriers by focusing on what WE truly want, and only judge ourselves against our best individual effort.

We live in a world where a multitude of very powerful forces have worked upon us, from birth, through school, to work, many times attempting to suppress our individuality, our creativity and, above all, our curiosity. In short, these forces can destroy everything that encourages us to think for ourselves.

Summary
The beauty of searching for new ways to exercise, and maintain a healthy high performance diet, is that no matter how perfect your body becomes, the journey to attain better health, lose body fat and gain lean muscle has enough meaning to propel your self-worth to a higher level.

I know you care enough about yourself to build a better, healthier body, or you wouldn’t be reading this. So, take this to the bank; you already have more self-worth than 99.9999 percent of the population.

Train Hard,

Vince

                Suggested reading;

http://www.amazon.com/Pathways-Bliss-Mythology-Personal-Transforma
tion/dp/1577314719/ref=pd_bxgy_b_text_b/103-4375356-9194203?ie=UTF8