timsbeefshack’s BodyBlog

yep. im getting married may 9. i am very excited. but i have a weight expectation for myself on that day. i want to be under 240. i weigh 249. i have 4 weeks to lose 9 pounds. i feel like i cant do it. i get to about 245 then i eat like crap and ruin it. i need to break the 240 barrier. when i got under 250 i was happier than hell. now i have become dissatisfied where im at. wich is a good thing. and now i have a mild heart condition to worry about. this is my life im dealing with. weight sometimes just looks like a number to me. and i can just say forget about it im not weighing myself this week i dont even care. the only time i get like that is when i know i have been lazy and not been healthy. thats eating working out and sleep. if i get too much or not enough of those things i know when i get on that scale im going to be dissapointed. i have to stop thinking of weight. and having to be a certain number to be happy. i know that if i eat right, work out, plenty of water and sleep the weight will come off without me even thinking about it. thats what i am going to strive for everyday the next 4 weeks. being as healthy as i can. for me. my well being and my life. so all you big ins’ best be watchin. im going to be under 240 without even trying…..at least i hope so. wish me luck. peace!

i want to lose 3 more pounds by x mas. i weighed 260 a couple of days ago. i kinda fell off of the weight loss bandwagon for 24 hours. me and my fiance went out for dinner and a movie. i did all right at dinner but the movie i had to get the big ol tub of extra buttered popcorn and milk duds. damn they are delicious. and a diet drink to make it all better. hahahaha. this morning had  some raisin bran. ya know get that fiberrrrr.  then for lunch/dinner i had half a frozn pizza with extra pepperoni and some diet drinks to make it better. not bad for a cheat day. i did not once feel deserving of all of this food. in fact felt bad and uncomfortable. which is a good thing. feeling deserving sometimes can devise your own demise. i feel like a deserve a ****ing hot fudge sunday everyday and pizza with extra cheese. but i know its not good for me. its weird how i can go without bad food for a period of time that when a week passes or a couple of days i think i decerve to have that pizza and candy and big fatty subs. if you think about a smoker trying to quit smoking. how successfull is he or she going to be if they think that after a few days or a week they can smoke a cigarette because hey they deserve it because they have been without for a whole week! they will probably not be very successfull at quiting smoking. its like being fat and trying to lose weight long term. if you think you are deserving of having fatty foods evrytime you been a good boy you will never lose weight or keep it off. overweight people desrve to live. you have to train the mind to appreciate the accomplishment of losing weight and being healthy overshadow the thought process that when you lose weight you get to eat. because if you think that way when you lose you gain. if you think the other way when you lose you win. holla atcha boy

yes i jumped back on the weight loss wagon with my big bro toobigfred. i have tried to eat sensibly as possible. its hard to eat right with the job i have. i am a mechanic. and i know all of you have had your cars worked on. and as a mechanic your job is to offer the best most professional work possible. wether i am hungry or not. tired or full of energy. the customer has priority one. i really do not get a steady lunch time. its when i get 5 min here or there i try and scarf something to keep me going.why? its to keep customers happy. and its easy to eat like crap when you know you have no time to fix yourself something. or even have time to think about eating right. so usually i get to eat a good breakfast. thats all i have time for. people are impatient with their cars and in turn impatient with their mechanic. so when you go get your car get worked on and they tell you its going to take a little longer then you want look at the sales guy with a smile and tell him that will be just fine. your safety is in your mechanics hands. his extremely hungry hands.his very aggrevated hands that havent seen food in 6 or 7 hours. so when you go pissin and moaning just know that your mechanic has ears and is probably hungry and when he hears he may leave your lug nuts loose!  

yes indeed my fatty friends. i worked out this morning. it was hard to get up and go but i knew how good it would feel after the workout. i did about 45 minutes of cardio and about 30 minutes of light lifting to just get into things. it felt good. you know whats weird to me? how after i get done with a workout i want to rush to the scale like i just perfomed a freakin miracle and lost 5 pounds.hahahah. and after i do good for about a week i rush to the scale in hopes im not fat anymore.hahaha my mind likes to play tricks on me. its a hard road to lose weight. the scale consumes me at times. like i weigh myself 3 times a day in hopes to see a number that makes me feel better about myself. its been 2 days since i stepped on the scale and i feel great. my mind is clearer now. it turned my focus to what i was eating and how i was going to workout more than how much i weighed. it put my priorities in order…..order..mmmm. you know what sounds good.. a baconator from wendy’s.mmmm. bacon. j.k! holla atcha boy. PEACE

The battle of the bulge. A mighty battle it is. A battle every human being has. I am now on the downward slope of a losing battle. I was 326 pounds at my fattest. the smallest at 247. i slowly gained to about 255 and stayed there for about 8 months. now i have climbed to almost 265-270 and rising like a morning wood. every fat guy has his moments being late night snacking to just flat out binge eating. i wrote a blog awhile back. feeling unhappy about where i was at weight wise at like 255. what i wouldnt give to be that again. the feeling of being absolutely worthless because of gaining weight. its almost too much to handle at times. the feeling of being disgusting. the feeling of being alone. its so hard to be fat and lose weight. the first thing is do you want to be a fat guy and have your identity be your weight. or do you lose weight and have the constant battle of keeping it off. and the toll it takes on your mind to be consumed with keeping it off rules your life. last but not least and the hardest one of all, be the guy who loses 100 pounds just to gain it all back. and be known as the the guy who was fat but got skinny just to gain it all back. mentally what do you do? whats worse? how do you stop it? thats where im at right now. i know alot of you are there with me. be it with weight loss or mass building or strenght training. any help or words of advice would be appreciated. thanks

yes, i am fat, its true. its hard to come to grips with it, i cant take my shirt off because im fat. i shop at the big and talL because im faT. BEING FAT COMES WITH NO PERKS. we have man boobs or as i like to call them "breastacles".  irreversable stretch marks. and dunlflop wHich if u dont know is your saggy ass ****in gut! i guess heart disease is a perk of being fat. diabetes too. oh i forgot alot of wear and tear on your body parts and joints. the sad thing is being fat is a choice. nobody makes us eat. we are a direct product of what we eat and what we do. Im sick of these fat ****s crying "why me" and " i eat right and excersise and i cant lose weight". if you did you wouldnt be fat. WHEN YOUR FAT YOU DONT DESERVE THAT LATE NIGHT SNACK, YOU DONT DESERVE THAT BAG OF CHIPS OR THAT SODA. dont let the mirror fool you guys, sometimes you get used to how you look. i didnt lose any weight this week. you want to know why? i didnt eat right. and i didnt excercise enough. i didnt go around bitching being in denial of what i did saying i did everything i could. so if you are fat, and you know who you are, come to grips with it. know that you dont deserve the tastey foods other people can eat. you dont deserve to be able to shop at a regular store to buy clothes. Be uncomfortable, be uncomfortable everyday. Dont be happy with who you are, because honestly we are fat because it was our choice to do so. Be strong fatties and lose some weight . PEACE

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