sparklebear00’s BodyBlog

I will spare all of you the explicit details of my sappy spiritual awakening, but I will say that something has clicked in my mind and that now I am back in the game.

I was very unhappy for a while…a while being my entire life, and for that I abused my body by consuming mass amounts of greasy, artery clogging foods. I’m a food addict, and I used food to comfort, reward, and punish myself.

However, something happened a few days ago, oddly enough around the same time that I bought A New Earth (but I don’t entirely credit the book to my change in mindset), where I just decided that I needed to change how I lived my life.

I have tried for the past year to start working out regularly and counting calories again, but I had no motivation. I used everything as an excuse to start working out (my up coming trip to Mexico, a wedding, and whatever else), but it wasn’t coming from my heart so I was off the plan in a few days.

I can’t explain what exactly happened, but I can say that things are different now. I am ready to get rid of the poison that I have been holding onto for years. For example, I Facebooked a girl that I hated in high school for no reason (we are actually very similar and had mutual friends), and sent her a message to apologize. I’m sure it meant nothing to her, but even that gesture and her forgiveness was a huge weight off my shoulders. I am working on riding myself of negative energy, people, and experiences. It is work in process, but the little taste that I have gotten of what it feels like to be free is ridiculously motivating.

Anyway, diet wise I ate 100% clean today, no cheating, and not even a THOUGHT of cheating! This is how I know that things are different. I am determined now. I didn’t work out today, but that’s okay. I’ll live. My deficit was enough that I didn’t need to work out anyway!

In completely unrelated news, I am chowing down on come cottage cheese, and it isn’t NEARLY as bad as I thought it would taste. I always avoided it because I’m not a milk drinker and the consistency is a little funky, but really…it kind of tastes like it has cheese in it, and who doesn’t like cheese?