to anyone who’s ever been a “victim”(or has known one)
I was a victim of horrible crimes many years ago. After 4 long, painful years of the not-so-great Canadian justice system, I can finally close this chapter and proudly say that the criminal is locked up, and boy does justice taste sweet. This is not a blog to solicit pity in any way.
I’m just hoping to maybe give some hope or courage to victims out there, that there IS justice, you just have to STAND UP AND FIGHT.
Also, I need to tell you the importance of bodybuilding in this process. You have no idea of the not only physical, but mental empowering that bb brings you. I mean, if you can be strict and disciplined with diet, training, supplements, you can go to the gym and lift HEAVY METAL right over your head!, than facing a bully becomes just a little easier.
hope to give you some hope, strength, courage
lift hard, be strong!!(and don’t ever let ANYONE TELL YOU “YOU CAN’T…)
be well
Post by: sparkie
February 18, 2008 at 9:21 am
Its not just Canada that has a flawed justice system, its everywhere. I had a period of this past summer when I had lost my job and feel way behind financially, I ended up doing a few days in jail bc I couldn’t pay a speeding ticket I had got.. What a joke, I showed the courts documentation and everything, yet they are so concerned with getting their money that they lock me up instead of finding the scum that pallute the streets. The system is horrible, however its something we have to live with and in your case Im happy to hear you no longer have to live with that chapter in your life wide open.
February 18, 2008 at 9:25 am
Thank you. That’s encouraging.
February 18, 2008 at 9:37 am
Glad you got justice! I agree that body building gives you a strength of character and empowerment. If you have the discipline to hit the gym often, eat correctly, get enough rest, and overall sculpt your body then you can deal with anything life throws at you. And no matter what life throws your way you know you can go to the gym and get your mind back on track and stay in control.
February 18, 2008 at 10:42 am
If you want justice you have to stand up for yourself - Justice starts with getting the courage to do something about it.
If you went through the process, then you are braver and stronger than most Canadian, many of us just give up.
February 18, 2008 at 12:34 pm
I love that weightlifting and training gives us women a sense of empowerment! You go girl!
A think every women on here will same thing "When one of us gets justice we all get justice..were all right there with ya .."
February 19, 2008 at 8:37 pm
Great blog!!
February 19, 2008 at 11:36 pm
WORD UP! I couldn’t agree more.
But mind you… on the topic of facing a bully; I saw this great episode on Oprah that said fear is a great thing to have. Men will always be stronger than women and that’s a fact. Being stronger helps but in a bad situation it’s best to listen to your gut and do everything to get the **** OUT! I could be interpreting what you said wrong, but I just thought i’d say that in case I didn’t.
In terms of bodybuilding for your own personal strength and empowerment… WORD UP AGAIN! SERIOUS!
February 21, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Very well said….and I’m glad you got some justice!!!
February 21, 2008 at 2:39 pm
Anyway i know Anyone can be tortured teased whatever you want to call it. its not very good for a girl.. or even a guy.
niether is this a comment to get some pity but i basicly went through grade …2-10 of teasing (as im still in highschool) i was just an angry kid.. but when i got to highschool there was football and working out. over my course of 3 and a bit years now currently in grade 12, i went down from about 300-305 to about 230 and a lot more muscle. the point of all of this is that. working out… sports.. there all great things… i dont know i cant really explain it
February 22, 2008 at 8:18 am
There is an incredible book written call "The Gift of Fear" written by Gavin DeBecker. He also writes one called "Protecting the Gift" about protecting your children. These are 2 must have’s. Oprah had him on years ago, he is an ex-police officer and he writes about how to empower yourself so not to become a victim. I am proud of you for starting this blog. The physical side is one way of getting stronger, the other thing is making yourself mentally tough. I used to teach self defense for women and children, these books I promoted heavily! Peace. J~
February 22, 2008 at 8:46 am
Reading the comments and talking to people about this subject is great as I realize that we are all affected in some way. One thing that most on this site have in common is that they find courage, strenght, and in some cases, self-control from bodybuilding and the lifestyle. The person who "let herself" be victimized years ago has been "SQUASHED" by the strong, muscular gal she’s become!
February 22, 2008 at 9:58 am
Great topic! fortunatly I have never been a victim, but I have to say I have gained so much confidence from working out. feeling strong and confident will protect us from becoming victims in the first place. I had read an article recently that suggested there are certain criteria for predators in choosing victims, they don’t want a fight.
February 24, 2008 at 4:57 pm
Your an awesome person. I’m sure your a big inspiration to many people; especially women.
Your right about working out. It does help me not only physically, but also mentally. It has given me confidence and made my life better.
Thank you for this post, it helps remind me why I love bodybuilding so much.
February 26, 2008 at 5:58 am
Sorry to hear you had to suffer in the past.
But you are so right about the weights. They are healing and very empowering.
Thank you for sharing with all of us.
Keep rising to the top Sparkie.
With love,
Carla
February 27, 2008 at 8:55 pm
I sincerely hope you never have to suffer like that again. I felt passion from your blog and I think you are VERY strong inside!! Take care always, Amy
March 3, 2008 at 9:58 am
wow, great to hear yuor doing much better !
March 3, 2008 at 10:08 am
Ya that is true…if you are able to show great diciplin in the gym you can face almost anybody out of it. Since becoming a personal trainer i have trained alot of people who come to me not to just be stronger but to feel better about themselves. The reason is because they will have a reason to feel proud. Proud because they took charge of there health and will possibly see more days than the average american…
March 3, 2008 at 2:44 pm
thats why i can’t wait to be a police officer, im sorry about what happened to you, and im glad to hear you have helped overcome it with the weights!!!!!! keep being strong girl!!!!!!!!
March 4, 2008 at 4:14 am
I am happy to hear you finally got justice. I know it can never take away what happened to you, but it’s a start. I totally agree with the empowerment of bodybuilding, but it is only a means. The true power is within yourself, within the choice you make to stand up and decide to do it. Many people use talking about it as their way of dealing, but seldom never go through it. Once you make that leap, the world is yours. You have a warrior’s spirit. I like that.
Stay Strong,
Jay
March 10, 2008 at 3:31 pm
burn his house down while he’s locked up. hahahahaha Ok, i’m a little over the top, but it makes me happy to think of doing that to him. just a smidgen of what it is like to be a victim.
ok, the great workout for stress. ready?
wide grip bent over barbell rows.
the wide grip forces the middle back muscles to work harder, then at bedtime, they are too exhausted to stay tight, they relax, and then you sleep like a baby.
I remember when all I need for stress relief was 45 min with the wife, oh well.
March 11, 2008 at 2:28 pm
Hi Sparkie,
I too was a victim of something so disgraceful to humankind (which they got away with…unless karma has struck them down by now)…and I carried it "privately" for about 20 years before telling someone…still no one knows the details, but I know exactly what you are/have/will feel the rest of your life. The important thing is we hold our heads up high and not let anyone get the best of us… So start holding that beautiful face of yours up for the world to behold…and be proud!
Ever want to talk privately, email me privately on this site and I’ll send my email and phone #. Stay strong, balanced, love and be loved!!! We all need to stick together.
Don’t like seeing you hide your face. I can tell from your "vibes" your gorgeous; inside and out!
March 12, 2008 at 8:01 am
There are too many of us! I was too scared to look for justice - that was 15 yrs ago. Now I work to put it behind me and move on.
I’ve always loved running, but after I injured my knee in HS, I kept no regular exercise routine. Funny thing is…. I made a goal for myself last Sept to "live healthier" and now my knee doesn’t hurt like it used to!
All the best for your continued success.
March 18, 2008 at 7:48 am
Great inspiration! Your blog gives a lot of hope to others.
March 18, 2008 at 7:50 am
Very encouraging words and I am very proud of you…Vinny
March 21, 2008 at 10:32 pm
First let me say that I am glad that you can close that chapter of your life and that BB help you get through it somehow. I work in a prison and know the value of fitness and the value of closure so its always good to hear that a victim of any crime has overcome it. And by the way, great job with your workouts, your lookin great.
March 24, 2008 at 2:59 pm
girl, u know what i think of you
you are one beautiful lady inside and out. keep on shining1
March 31, 2008 at 10:20 am
Many criminals know the justice system that they go around it.
Sometimes the punishment is not serve enough so it okay for them to take a risk on that.
April 3, 2008 at 11:23 am
I had a very close friend have something really bad happen to her, I think that 14+ years later she’s gotten on, but it’s still something that bothers me a lot. The person that committed the crime was brought to justice, but the fact that it happened still effects the way I look at women and the need I feel they have to be strong. Not only psychically, but mentally as well. I live martial arts, and play with my wife a lot, little does she know that my play is actually me teaching. She may not notice it, but over the years she’s become tuffer!
My advice to all the women here would be to put those muscles to use can get involved in a form of Martial arts that’s been proven practical form, such as BBJ, Muay Thai, Boxing, Krav Maga, Kali, anything other then a points only style that looks good when you spar against other people that do the same thing.
Thanks my 2cents, hope you didn’t mind my long winded comment.
April 11, 2008 at 11:45 am
Awesome Blog.. Since i know what’s its all about being in the field..
April 18, 2008 at 8:12 am
Very inspirational blog! Really got me to examine my own commitment (or lack thereof, sometimes). Congrats on finally getting the justice you deserve.
May 2, 2008 at 12:35 pm
Hi Sparkie,
You have a very positive aura about you! Your blog reminded me of a friend of mine who encountered unbelievable abusie. He though took his experience and transformed it into the positive. He’s a prosecutor and protects victims with a vengeance.
-Kathy
May 14, 2008 at 10:13 am
postitive !!
May 23, 2008 at 11:58 pm
not anyone could tell you cant but I am the type of person who studies before doing stuff.
‘Never enter a fight if you are going to lose."
and some fights are meant for you to lose but you learn from it
May 28, 2008 at 2:42 pm
You are an inspiration. Keep fighting the good fight!
June 17, 2008 at 12:31 pm
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