shellyrene’s BodyBlog

I had to ‘temporarily’ delete them…I just can’t stand looking at them!!I know I shouldn’t be ashamed but they’re just soo disgusting and besides I feel like I just want to keep looking and moving FORWARD….so….I decided to only post the previous month’s pictures and then at the end I will probably post them to help motivate others. In the meantime, it was just bringing me down because I dont relate to that person anymore. I was just suffocating in my fat body…now, I feel like Im alive again for the first time in years. I still have sooo far to go but I feel it was bad ‘feng shui’ lol   bad energy to keep looking at that sad reminder of what I looked like yUCK YUCK YUCK I am no longer that person, Im reinventing myself Im going to be stronger, healthier and more beautiful than ever and then the best part i can be MYSLF-who I have been trapped inside -like a prisoner-now, i will shed the layers of sadness….depression…unhappiness and self destruction.

well, I guess I wasn’t really planning on GAINING…but, it happened ….since my weight training I went from my lowest 176.8 to this morning 179.8   It sucks but its been a good eye opener , too! Its made me realize I need to really improve my eating…somehting Ive kindof taken for granted. I cant say that this hasnt discouraged me -it HAS-but it wont defeat me. I am in this for the long run. I never NEVER thought it would take as long as it has….considering I have lost exactly 20 pounds in 5 months! I actually figured Id be down 50 by now!!!!!!let me tell ya-Ive been really REALLY working hard at the exercise, probably TOO hard where it became ineffective. but, the old me mentality would have given up by now but now I see that hey, it may be only 20 pounds but that is PURE fat!!!we arent talking water weight but hard earned blood, sweat and tears   FAT!! so, i cant complain. And when i started i was about a size 18 ( on my petite 5 foot 1 frame) and now Im ALMOST a size 14…so, no-its not the major difference I expected in the beginning but its all good. i know Ill reach –no I will SURPASS my goals in 2007 even though it wont happen by my birthday in September. I will be well on my way. Hey, theres no way id stop now anyways. this is permanent…my commitment will not waiver….

as a beginner here, I just recently started lifting..I love it and can already see some small changes in my biceps..the problem is I have noticed a real increase in my appetite. Today, 2 hours before I left work I ate a powerbar before i headed straight to the gym….after a tough workout (30 minutes of high intesnsity elliptical-cardio and then about 30 of lifting 15-20 pound dumbbells) I was starvinG!!I think I had too much for dinner-grilled steak and broccoli and THEN big salad with some chicken breast. I dont want to negate the hard effort that Im putting into my workouts. ANY suggestions would be helpful Thanks 

I just started using dumbbells at the gym-before this I tried the arm curl cybex machine but didn’t really feel it was as effective. So,my question is i am using the 15 pound dumbells and doing like 30-40 curls on each arm.>>what do really fit, big guys use? I saw some guy using 30 pounds-he was average size…and I didnt want to really stare at the really fit, bigger guys. Thanks

another beautiful day…windows open, sun shining,the sound of my daughter playing her guitar (she’s really good) and someone outside mowing their lawn….I did an awesome cardio AND strength training session this morning. Im working my shoulders and biceps…I think their going to really respond quickly. I can’t wait to lose more fat so I can start the really  fun part of ’sculpting’. But, for now Im loving the elliptical and melting fattttt!!

OMG…Guess who I saw today??!!Yep, THE DALAI LAMA!! I was in Northampton and he had just finished up at Smith College and there HE was…wearing his robe/attire surrounded by about 4 children )also dressed in the same clothing) and security.He smiled at me as we almost brushed shoulders. I was tempted to whip out my cell phone and snap a pic-or at least ask "Master, and message for me!" lol It was verrry cool

Today I can start to feel and see some changes My husband and I were lying in bed and he put is arm around me and I felt his hand touch my hipbone…MY HIPBONE!!!Like, I seriously forgot I had any bones, lol, I began to think I was a big gelatinous blob of tissue. So, that was very cool.

ANother thing, I actually have to start making myself remember to EAT!Is that weird or what? I know that its omportant to eat (preferably small meals throughout the day) but , its just not a big priority anymore.
I guess Im alittle-ok ALOT-obsessed. The more I succeed the more obsessive I am getting.For instance, today I did a HEAVY cardio workout this morning and Im going back again at 3!!Well, anyways…alls cool with the world today

it’s a beautiful day in new england….just the kind of day to make you feel happy to be alive! I finished a great workout after work and now Im at home getting ready to cook a healthy meal on the grill. I am also psyched because I am just about at the 20 pound mark now and Im not ever gonna give up…which makes me glad cuz before I would have quit if it took this long BUT now, finally-I am doing it the right way (and the permanent way). Within the next few days I wil post more progress pics. I have 45more pounds to go!!!!!!