sbogard08’s BodyBlog

So I competed n the OCB Pride of the Atlantic show in Richmond, VA last weekend. I didn’t do as well I I hoped, although I wasn’t surprised.  I placed 6th in Master’s and 11th in Open Short Class.  It was a VERY competitive show with many well-conditioned girls.  Going into the show, I wasn’t quite feeling ready to step on the stage.  The weeks leading up to the show were very hectic for me at work and my training was suboptimal.  Couldn’t get my cardio sessions in, which is crucial in those last weeks.  My overall conditioning was pretty good, but I know that I wasn’t at my my best.  After the show I spoke to the judges regarding how I could improve things , and most said the same……..quad sweep, abs…..  But one judge said something that completely shook my self confidence. It’s not so much what he said, but how he said it. He said that I needed to work on developing my arms and shoulders b/c my shoulders were very small compared to some of the other competitiors.  Now, that is the first time that I have heard that one. My shoulders are usually one of the first things tha tI get a compliment on.  That being said he went on and on about it as though he wanted to make sure that I understood that he did not care for my shoulders….afterall, he has been judging shows for X # of years….   So after I picked up my self esteem and drove back to Virgina Beach, I really started to question why I even put myself through all of this.  Why am I constantly beating up my body and pushing it past its limits?  Why do I spend most of my time isolated in the gym with just some iron and cardio machines, when all of my friends are hanging out and "enjoying" life.  Why do I get up at the crack of ass, even when I donot have to go to work, just so I can get a "good" workout in at the gym early enough to return later to do some cardio? Why do I eat the same 10-15 items day-in and day-out, and deprive myself of the Starbuck’s Chai Tea Latte, Godiva Chocolate Cheesecake, and Gourmet Pizza that I so dearly LOVE?  Why do I seemingly sacrifrice any and everything that could possible be a diversion from my fitness goals…including some personal relationships…….Why?  Am I crazy?  Do I just like to be tortured?  Does everything have to be a challange in my life?  Why am I doing this?  And even more, why should I keep doing it?…..The short answer….I do it because I LOVE IT!  I love pushing myself to new levels and seeing the results. I love proving to myself that I can be disciplined enough to stick to my diet.  And I love the adrenaline of competition.  And I love my shoulders because they are awesome!!!

With that being said, my self-esteem and I are one again.  And today I have officially decided that I will compete in the NPC Lynda Murray Competition here in Norfolk in August.  I have just over 12 weeks to train, and once again I will get bigger, stronger, leaner, and stay feminine in the process.  So off to do some Arnold presses b/c I’ve got to work on my shoulders (LOL!).

So I am now 2 weeks out and searching for some extra energy to get through this slump that I have seemed to fall into.  My energy levl has been very low recently and I feel as though I am beyond exhausted.  However, there is something in me that just will not allow me to quit (even though I sent my trainer a text message saying otherwise).  Lack of sleep is really taking its toll on me.   Although there are 2 other shows that I would like to compete in later this year, I really think that I am going to take some time off after this show.  I will keep eating clean, but will likely limit my time in the gym to 4 days.  Hopefully, as long as I keep my diet in check, I can limit fat while gaining a little bit more muscle. 

As for the show, I am excited and anxious at the same time. Ready tohit the stage and do my thing, but still wisshing I had more muscle.  Although I have done my very best with my training and diet, I know that there is always someone out there who did it just a little bit harder.  And you never know who is going to show up.  So I know I have to bring my very best, or its not even worth getting up there on that stage.  Doing things a little different this time.  I didn’t do tanning for the last show…got my Jantana Competition kit ordered (hopefully it will arrive tomorrow).  Did all my own posing last time….3 sessions with posing coach this time.  Still can’t quite hit the back pose everytime though.  Still have time to work out the kinks though.  The only thing that I have not done is picked a song for my individual presentation.  Have no idea what I’m going to use.  I don’t really listen to the radio that much, so I am at a lost.  May end up going with something old that I am familiar with.  My daughter will love that.  She thinks that I am so old.  Using my same suit, although I’m adding more stones to it.  Decided to wait to get new suit b/c I am planning to get some girls before next show, so will need to get new one then.

All in all, I want to relax and enjoy myself in two weeks. Although it’s alway nice to bring home some hardware, I really do feel like my victory is my journey to the stage.  In my chaotic world as an Ob/Gyn resident, being able to have the self-discipline and consistency in my training to even compete gives me a sense of pride and accomplishment that is only enhanced with the trophy.