The Journey

The best part of having an identity is that everyone around you notices.  You know who you are and no one can change that about you.  When you finally find that spot within yourself that is your center of gravity, it’s a magnificent thing.  Relentless pain cannot harm or break you.  The power to accomplish and achieve exceeds that of weakness.  You never lose your identity through those that will try to bring you down.  Instead you look at each failure as just a near miss, and that you will get there through your own strength.

The time, patience, and consistency that I dedicate each day, yields its own rewards.  I may not accomplish this week, or even the next, but I will accomplish.  I bleed it all out on the gym floor to accomplish those small goals that lead to bigger ones.  Each battle that is won I have fought so diligently and sacrificed so intently.  I put it out there.  Here I am, ready to grow, ready to achieve.  You won’t control me.  I will break free of inadequacy, and endure through my own center of gravity.  Welcome to my universe; ground zero.  Where the unreachable is shrugged off, and success is measured by pure conviction.

Here will be my new training day diet starting on Monday 8/17

Meal 1 - 8 egg whites, 1 egg yolk, 1.5 cups oatmeal (cooked)

Meal 2 - 4-5 oz. Extra lean Ground Turkey Breast, 1.5 cup oatmeal (cooked) or 7-8 oz sweet potato (no skin), 1 cup green beans

Meal 3 - 6.5 oz chicken breast, 3/4 cup brown rice, 1 cup green beans

Meal 4 - 4 oz can of low sodium tuna, 1 Kashi Bar, 1 oz of almonds or assorted nut mix
Meal 5 (pre-workout) - 1 cup oatmeal (cooked), 1 kashi bar, 1 scoop ON Whey Protein in water

PWO Shake - 2 scoops ON Whey Protein in water, 2 tsps. dextrose, 1 medium sized banana
Meal 6 - 1 can of alaskan salmon (3 servings 180 calories), 1.5 cup oatmeal (cooked) or 7-8 oz of sweet potato (no skin) or 1 cup brown rice

Pre-Sleep - 1 Scoop ON Casein Protein, 1 tablespoon of organic PB

Calories - 3056

Why so many calories?  Well, I upped my cardio to 35 minutes 4 times a week now and 15-20 minutes of cardio on leg day.  I am getting results without lowering calories, so I’d much rather eat more than eat less!!!!

Off-days I basically eat 2450-2500 calories, a lean protein source with every meal, and a low GI carb with every meal.

This new regimen should give me serious results, esp. with adding more and more cardio in.  I’ve managed to actually get stronger and shed bodyfat at the same time, which is freaking awesome.

Food.

I never realized how much nutrition mattered for gaining muscle until I started eating correctly.  I honestly can’t remember the first day I decided to start eating 6-7 meals a day with the right macronutrient ratios and such.  It seems like I’ve been eating this way for SO long now that I don’t even remember how to eat any other way.  I turn down free food from my friends.  I turn down alcohol when I go out to bars.  Sometimes I wish I wasn’t so strict about my calorie intake and such, but as a beginner in this sport I want to make everything perfect so that later on I can adapt and change so that I can be a litter more lenient.  Now is the time for me to figure out my body even though it is always changing.

Nutrition has been 95% of the equation now for me.  I dare say 97.5% of the equation because now that I know cardio is just a tool to burn more calories that only leaves my training.  Since I made the realization that what you eat is essential to building the best quality muscle I become the most anal bastard when it comes to food.  Anyone else have this problem?  In most respects, I really don’t care.  People can live their lives as they want.  I will be scientific in my eating and my training because I know that to look my best and to my best I have to give 150%.

My roommate commented to me last night about eating differently on my day off.  She said, "You don’t lift tomorrow what does it matter what you eat?"  I simply chuckled at that and said "everything that goes in my body matters."  It matters even more on the days I don’t lift because I give my body rest and feed it to grow.  Our bodies grow when we are at rest, not in the gym.

I don’t take it personally, though.  We will all live our lives the way we see fit.  For me growth, both physically and spiritually happens when I give everything I can.  That includes eating perfectly.  I will grow.  It may take years, but I will grow.

Each day, a gift.  I must try so hard to utilize what I have been given to make the best possible scenario of who I am.  Everything around me stands still in comparison with moving heavy weight.  That is the only thing I see.  The iron.  It brings me back from my translucent life.  What’s more, it gives me an intense focus that holds my life together completely.  So many years I hung in limbo, trying to find that one thing that I could call my own.  Here it was already in front of me.  In the mirror everyday, staring me in the face.

Change can be a gift too.  The will to change oneself into something greater through dedication, time, patience, and goddamn hard ass work.  The why is inconsequential at this point.  All there is now is a driving force.  Day after day putting in the time to see the next weeks changes.  What will I look like in 3 days? 6 months? A year?  Who knows.  I look forward to it though.  That thing staring me in the mirror is of my own consequence.  My own damn design.  My body does not control me anymore, I control it.  So many things in life we lose control of if there is one thing I know it is that I can wield my body like a sword, bring it to port like a ship at sea.

I have not fully mastered this art yet, but I am well on my way to truly understanding exactly the way my body works.  The challenge is there and I meet it head on everyday.  I expect nothing less than my complete focus to achieve the best me.  This is all I know.  This is all I am.