Just 1 Fat Chick on a Diet

Today I bought a pair of little booty shorts..12.99 at Target, gotta love it..My bf loves them. I am amazed that I actually dont want to throw up when I see myself in them. I’m relatively happy with the progression on my legs. Still a lot more to go, but today I went for about a 3 mile bike ride with the beau. We saw a fox!!! First time I’ve ever seen such a thing on Long Island. I was in complete disbelief. Coolest animal I’ve ever seen running the streets here!!

 Anyhow I bought Kevin (my bf) a bike as a little present and he enjoyed riding around with me a lot more than I thought he would, which made me really happy. I didnt really work up a great amount of sweat, but my quads are killer sore, so I guess thats good. My trainer (paul) wants me to do 30 minutes of cardio 4-5 times a week on top of diet and our training, but he said to really be sweating. I wasnt…but I went for probably more like an hour, if not longer….so I hope that evens it out.

Gotta take a peek at the diet for today, and then going to do some legs raises that I neglected from yesterday and maybe abs. Its a girly time of the month…you know…so I dunno if my stomach is feeling all that movement but I’m going to try..

I also am pretty proud of myself from last night. I went out to a nice Italian resturaunt and had a few cheats, but think they were probably better for my diet than I initially thought. See I was supposed to have a romaine salad  with salmon and chicken  (4oz and  3oz, respectively) and then when we got home have a protein shake with two scoops of protein. We ended up making plans to go to Fire Island, which is a whooooole nother story I’m a little annoyed about. (below) So i ate my whole plate when they brought it. Which ended up being more like (6oz) of chicken and (8 oz of salmon) and some carrots and green  beans. I had some (4) mussels (figured with their name..they cant be too horrible for your body) and a LITTLE taste of the bad stuff…(a bite of bread, of my bf’s steak, of his friends veal rollatini and his friend’s gf’s strawberry cheescake..) a LITTLE taste of everything. Everyone shares very nicely ;op So instead of getting a bad entree and some dessert I sampled a bit…I dont think thats as bad as I could’ve beeen with all the temptations.

To drink although I wouldve loved a glass of wine, I had 2 teas with one sugar each…and for dessert a cup of coffee, with dab of milk and 2 sugars…(I’m not going to check the calories, because its done already and today is a new day)

So onto Fire Island…sheesh…first of I dont think I’ll ever go there again sober..it was a bunch of seagull cackling, fran dresher sound-a-like, gum smacking, hair twirling, whorish twits…and stalking them were a bunch of roided out, gotti wannabee, small T-shirt wearing, loud-mouthed drunk men….It was like an island full entirely with the bowels of humanity …my bf said it best when he said "its like someone cloned their entire personalities and souls over and over again and just put them in different bodies". Needless to say I was really tempted to throw a few drinks back, but I didnt. Stayed sober. (mostly cause I promised to be a designated driver, although I ended up not driving afterall)

But one thing these obnoxious women did have on me were these tight little bodies in completely innappropriately short dresses and shorts with their cheeks hanging on out….yeah I was more jealous than I’d like to admit… I felt like I was in high school again. That anxiety and panic, that I was being looked at like an outcast. No one was even looking at me I’m sure of it, but I began to feel like my arms were sooo flabby and my butt was so saggy and big and gross, and my thighs thunderous…I felt drab, old and fat… I started hating myself a bit..like I used to..I kind of wanted to cry and run away. I wondered if my bf would be more satisfied with any of these girls, personality-less or not…I wondered if my personality was the only reason he would choose me..

Now a bit of background on myself that not many of my bodyspace "fans" know and would seem uncharacteristic of my chipper self. I was extremely mentally abused about my weight growing up (and everything else), by someone very close to me. Used to call me fat at 7 years old…made me wear long sleeves in the dead of summer..under my bathing suit even…gave me an entirely unrealistic view of what a woman’s body should look like at perfection….subjected me to constant watching of Howard Stern, critiquing all these tiny beautiful women like they were disgusting. It has taken me years, and I’ve gone through many weight battles, including bulimia….and I finally got to a place where I am semi-comfortable with who I saw in the mirror…and who I am entirely. It hurts me badly when I regress like this…I know I’m not perfect by any means and not any guys IDEAL fantasy (except the hubbies, because he loves me) but I am going to have to be ok with who I am and just work on making it better…so today…I bought the shorts…They may not look like they do on every girl in FI…but for me…I’m much happier with the way they look now than they wouldve in the beginning. And I’m noticing that I may not be "The FAT one" anymore….Even if I still feel like it… :/

Ok so my goal first is to help motivate everyone on here as much as I can and do whatever I can to give back, because you guys really keep me motivated and I love you all for it. So I’m going to try to at least 3 blogs a week, give a bit of knowledge that I’ve learned or share a recipe or something…todays recipe link is for Instant Flax Meal Peanut Butter Hot Cereal..

http://lowcarbdiets.about.com/od/breakfast1/r/flaxpdcereal.htm

 I’m going to try half of this today and let you know how it tastes…

So onto my training. Today my trainer came and worked my butt so hard that I almost puked..I actually was dizzy and nausceous (spelling) for about 30 min after he left..but feeling great now…wish i couldve pushed myself harder:

push ups

renegade rows

moutain climber

squat thrusts http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LS3PunC_aE&feature=channel

 bicep curls, over head dumbell presses

pelvic thrusts

3 sets of each excersize in a row for about 30 minutes straight..I wanted to kill him. But he knows I’m grateful… :0)

Also about my diet…cut it down a ton..which I am thankful for…1250-1400 cal, 75-90 carbs! (was a little scared), 45-50  fat, 135-150 protein…big changes from my 1600-1900 cal diet…He said we should see a 2-3 lb loss every week with this diet when accompanied by our sessions and 30 min of cardio 4 times a week. I’m ready to see it come off. Being in the 150’s now I feel so much like this is conquerable and I feel amazing!!

I just bought a new bikini…which I think already looks pretty good…and its adjustable for when the rest of the chunk comes off! :0) So I will take pics when I find my camera…and am using it as a motivation point from now on! :0)

 Everyone stay healthy and happy and keep in touch! :0) Keep progressing!

I’d like to start off by saying: that memorial day excess baggage…the 1.5 lbs I gained in one day..has made way for todays 2 lb loss..bringing the weight not only back down to where it was but to 160.5 which is EXACTLY 35 lbs lost…25 left and it seems such an easier number to reach than 30 lbs.. :0) I’m ready to let that 25 go!

So today…Although I picked up my phone this morning to see the dread number 666 dialed into it…I had a pretty frickin awesome day…

 I preplanned a little towards the end of the day to get my nutrient levels where I wanted them…Needed to make the calories a bit higher to get all the protein fiber and fat I needed…so I dont know if I shouldve just left the calories low and nutrient counts low with it, or bumped it up like I did…I bumped it up and havent eaten past 6pm..which I think is awesome! :0) First night in a long time that I’ve done that and feel completely full

 I finished off the night with 2 green teas, cause I was feeling a little sluggish (I’m not getting sick<<<<denial) and went for a short 15 minute jog/walk around the hilly terrain with the two little ones in the double stroller…not a lot of time, but better than nothing and I worked up one hell of a sweat..those kids are not LIGHT! lol Not to mention I ran the last block cause I almost peed my pants from all the water I’m drinking..CANNOT wait to adjust to that…or I may need to borrow some of the childrens diapers :/

All and all I am proud of my itsy bitsy bit of progress :0) and to reach the 35 lb mark…Here is the breakdown of everything…

Calories- 1822 Carbs- 156 (woot woot) Fat- 69 Protein- 160 Fiber-28 Sodium 3016 (any tips on bringing this down more?)

Well keep in touch all of my friends and stay healthy and beautiful

xoxo

Lori Anne

As referenced in my previous blog..here is todays slow climb out of carb-land..not as terrible as I thought…and at least its all before 8pm

So yesterday…which I kind of knew would turn out the way it did  ..was the memorial day BBQ at the M-I-L’s (mother in law)…who is an amazing cook…I started my day positive..trying to avoid the inevitable…

I ate an amazing breakfast, which I made for my honey too (trying to get him eating healthier regularly)…I made eggs with lowfat cheese and onions, and fiber one (protein packed) pancakes with bananas and flax seed, cooked them in a wee bit of olive-oil.  YUMMY..(tasted like banana nut pancakes)

Did a 30 minute run of cardio…10 on the eliptical, 15 on the bicycle and 5 on the stairmaster (until they closed)

And had a protein shake to curb my appetite at the BBQ, with 2.5 scoops of strawberry protein and strawberries mixed into water

 Dinner time I was going strong…even brought my own shrimp from home and put it on a skewer with some green peppers…(everyone laughed at me…but I could’ve cared less..)and some light kidney beans as a side for some protein, good fats, fiber and a substitution for all the other mayo-filled side dishes…

And then after specifically asking the M-I-L if the burgers on the table were turkey, I grabbed one, removed the white bun and put it on a whole wheat sandwich thin ate that with some grilled chicken (bunless)and some salad with feta tomato and olives…I felt proud that I wasnt screwing up too bad…

 THEN……after scarfing my whole burger down and the rest of my plate…I heard someone say "Ok heres the turkey burgers now" ( was a miscommunication) I nearly had a fit…I ate a whole regular burger. And really in retrospect I shouldve just moved on….AND THERE IS A MORAL IN HERE….

I let it get to me so bad…that self-defeating attitude that I always preach to avoid..that regret…so what did I do…ENTIRELY give up for the day…"forget it, I said..its a holiday…and I already ruined it with that burger"

Another half a burger AND a turkey burger…then ice cream, angel food cake with cool whip and strawberries in syrup, scones, a brownie…let the carb binging begin…I felt awful

The worst part about it…I never even felt full..I guess that carbs do nothing to supress appetite..but provoke it…I never realized it until I cut the starched out of my diet…

Last night I begged my bf to go for a bike ride with me..and he wouldve, but the bike that he thought was at his mothers was gone…so…no dice…

This morning I was sluggish and pretty unhappy with myself about the day before…BUT this time I took a different stand. I started my day like yesterday never happened. I learned my lesson.

That self-defeating, pity-me.."I hate myself".."I should just give up" attitude…did me no good and I would not allow myself to regress again. I’ve made amazing progress and I WILL do better…EVEN WHEN I STEPPED ON THE SCALE…and GAINED BACK THAT LB I FINALLY LOST! and then another .5 lbs…I just shrugged…I lost it once…its doable again. No regret is going to break me… As far as I’m concerned..yesterday was a figment…and I just have to keep progressing.

My hunger has had different plans..I guess from the increase in carbs, but I’ve managed to at least stay healthy foods..even if they’re a little excessive today…I’ll do even better tomorrow and so on…stay tuned later for the calorie/carb update…(baby’s awake)

Spent the day at the beach for the most part and took a few small naps, so my meals again were not spaced properly…but overall the verdict is not bad

calories: 1751, fat 57, carbs 149 (pretty good), protein 169g (awesome), fiber 28g, sodium 3094 (high)

tomorrow is the real threat…I will do my best..bbq at the mother in laws!

I started the day off with a 2 hr delay in eating, cause there was no food at my house and stomach was bugging me..rushed around the rest of the day..training, food shopping, going to the bank..missed a few meals and ate a lot at once..but seemingly ate closer to my goals..so I’m happy about that…ESPECIALLY with the fact that we went out to popeyes. I ordered super healthy and am totally stoked with what sparkpeople calculated for me..

(THAT CHART DID NOT WORK)..will have to do it manually

calories 1834 (high) carbs 169 (high but better) fat 64 (trainer says too low) protein 169!!! (yippee)

Will type the rest all out tomorrow..I’m sleepy…

Heres the list:

Hood simply skim milk

18 eggs, which I plan to boil half and egg white the rest..

Perdue shortcuts chicken brst: honey roasted, original and griller

Perdue shortcuts trky brst: oven rstd

Vita muffin..choc choc chip (this is my treat)

100% whole wheat bread (mostly for the bf)

thomas’s light  better start whole grain english muffins

Frigo light mozz cheese sticks

JD Trky sausage, egg and potato breakfast (for a cheat one day to supplement egg sandwich)

Shrimp, frozen cooked

Tilapia frozen

minute brown rice

Blackberries

Cottage cheese AChoice 1% milkfat

AChoice canned chicken breast, white meat 98% fat free

AChoice Tuna canned in water

Herb roasted nut mixed with almonds, pecans and cashews

Almonds, whole plain

strawberries

kidney beans

bananas

celery

red, yellow and orange peppers

avocados..( have no idea how these are eaten)

swt potatoes (microwave in the bag kind, cause I dont cook)

carrots, organic baby peeled (for snacking)

red delicious apples

What do we think?!

Um…trained today…hooooooooly….I’m going to be sore…

I dont know weights and all that jazz..leave that to the trainer, who just pushes me. I’d rather not know how heavy etc..because I think then it becomes mentally defeating.

by @ the gym.. I did

10 minutes on the stairstepper (first time using a stair stepper…yoooow…10 min is enough!)

about 5 sets of bi-cep and tri-cep curls

renegade rows with small dumbells…(enough of those to make me want to punch him…)

pelvic thrusts

push-ups (bringin up the ta-tas..amen to that)

worked shoulders and chest on the machine..you know that one… (I have no idea what its all called) Where you pull your arms apart..hope that helps..but 2 sets for both sides

SQUAT THRUST…(AND HOLY SH*T….are those things PAINFUL!) 2 sets of 12 I think

and leg raises 25 on each leg…

But most important..I will post what these squat thrusts look like for any of those girls tryin to tone up the bottom…I can feel it already..and in two days….I may not be able to sit….

to be in 2010’s best female bodies on bodyspace..even if I dont will. Just to be confidence and sexy enough to nominate myself ;op Time to hit the gym with my trainer!