Opeca64’s Blog

Have you ever gone to the gym pumped and ready to go and suddenly you get there - and it seems like everyone in the free weight room is staring at you - or ambivalent - and down in the dumps? That was what happened to me yesterday!

It really bothers me when I’m working as hard as I can, and yet everyone is so out-of-it and in their own world that if you dare to ask: "Is someone using the Smith Machine?" You get the sarcastic response: "I don’t know. I know I’m not."  I was getting real attitude from the free-weighters at my gym yesturday, and have no idea why.  I try and keep my distance from most people in the weight-room just because I don’t know anyone.  I’m usually the youngest & the only girl with a barbell in attendence.

I get really self-concious when stuff like that happens - it ruined my day in a way.  I went to work and I was all out-of-it.  (Didn’t help that I had to do the work of two people at work.)  Sigh.

So, iTunes told me at long last that the problem with the update - was there’s.  Thank gods, I’m so tired of fixing my computer (I just had to reformat my computer).  Anyways I got a hold of Lean Me (Pro), by Miriai LLP.  Well, so far (Day 1) I’m pretty impressed, with a few minor complaints.

Obviously this app is designed for serious fittness enthusasists, reviews from iTunes are from the general public - and most complained how they felt like they didn’t understand what was going on…"this isn’t just a calorie-counter, is it?"

“With Lean Me we set out to create the only professional level, fully integrated diet and fitness tracking software for the iPhone. To that end, we had an ACSM Certified Personal Trainer on site throughout every day of development, leveraging his 17 years of experience to help us really understand the difficulties of counting calories and how to make Lean Me both as powerful and as intuitive as possible.” (TechRepublic.com…quoting Miriai LLP Developers)

You do get just that:  Adaptive Calorie Settings, Bodyfat Calculators, etc.  Beautfiul really.

My only cons:

• You can’t delete food entries once they’ve been made.
• Most brand-name foods must be manually entered.
• Serving Size settings can get a little awkward.

I don’t know what other people thought.  But so far so good.  I paid $13 for it - I’m going to work with it as much as possible.

The following is a bit that I thought was interesting from Calorie-Count.com.  I also have an account at Calorie-count.com, for I use the calculator for analysis because I’m too cheep to buy my own software (I actually just downloaded "Lean Me" for my iTouch, I just have to get my software updated (which is taking time).  Anyways, I’m glad to say that I’ve finally complete my therapy!!!! (I officially was given the green light from my providers, but more importantly I feel wonderful & in control).  My binging has whittled down to that chocolate truffle that one cannot resist at Christmas time.

Anyways, I’ve been prepping my body for intenser-training come January 2009 - though I didn’t plan for a New Year’s Resolution - LOL.  Just after I stopped interacting with the website I was diagnosed with Exercise-Induced Anaphylaxis…which meant that I was allergic to exercise…so all of my training went on halt and I focused on my efforts to target the reason for the sudden outburst of allergic-hypersensitivity.  I gained weight over the last year - mostly because I couldn’t play hockey or even walk around the block…very unhappy about all that.  For whatever reason, roller skating wasn’t effected tremendously by the onset of the period of hypersensitivity, so I could remain at my job (you’d be surprised by how little movement you need to skate.)

I have been very touched by the support that I’ve received here.  Thank you to everyone!

Here’s the “postings” from Calorie-Count.com (Now affiliated with About.com):

Okay, the following is (at least from my point of view hysterical) … so this individual continuously tries to prove her point that one should never-ever eat frosted flakes, when the thread was simply asking if they were okay once and while.  I felt a little angry that she was swinging my point - so I ranted a bit…probably shouldn’t have (should have been the better person and all)…but I found it entertaining.
Read the rest of this entry »

So…it’s been a long time since I have posted anything on my BodyBlog…so I might just have to do some catch up.  My life has really improved, in general, not just in my fitness level.  I am frustrated at the momment with my school’s academics beacuse they cannot provide me with the math courses I need.  You see, my school is really small.  I was transfered there from my public school when my depression hit its worst.  Now I’m stuck there for a few monthes completing group and family therapy until both my family and my emotional state is well.  Of course…that was a few monthes ago…things are pretty much done these days.
In terms of my fitness level, I have been working on developing better habits for my future and a different mindset about food in general.  This is something that I didn’t see as important as before.  My body fat percentage dropped dramatically once I stopped binging/restricting (in fact I eat more than my dietitian thought I should, but not gaining much other than muscle. lol).  I’ve been about 124 for the past 5 weeks, but I’ve gone from a 13 size pant down to a six (which is falling off - and therefore pissing me off. startling to say the least)

In all honesty I wasn’t even following a strict body-building diet at all.  I started that just recently after I decided that I wanted to get past the 124 plateau.  All of this probably has to do with my new job: I am currently working as a skate-guard at a roller rink (something rather physically demanding).  It’s a job that I have wanted for years.  Hardest part is that you go anywhere fro 3-12 hours working.  This involves handing out rental skates, circling the floor and helping people up, sweeping the entire floor and the asile, doing the snack bar, and then DJ-ing. There usually are a few people working with me - but we all cover 2 of those jobs per session (3 hours).  I always choose circling the floor and the stateroom (handing out rental skates); both of which you have to wear your own skates to do.  Of course…the amount of energy I put out in a day of work is obscenely large - I have know idea if I’m suppose to try and cover some of the deficit or not - I don’t even want to consider that for me - skating for 6 hours is about 2,366 calories burn itself…

Anyways…that’s it for right now, write more later

This is really rewarding the strength in my upper body has allready increase quite a bit and I noticed it in gym class. lol.  My weight has dropped a bit - but my concern is over what was acctually lost.  I went ot see my dietican and my bodyfat went up - which was really disheartening and rather confusing because I don’t know what I did.  I feel stronger - but am I really eating muscle?  What’s up with that?

I suppose my eating might be a little low - I’m working on correcting this but I don’t really know quite what to do - or what is best.  From all the reasearch I have found that I am an endomorph - but what with an increasing bodyfat?

Sometimes I wonder if I’m the only teenager who simply begins crying as they walk into a department store.  There are thousands of reasons why this simple task is just about the hardest thing that I can do.

1. Shame for Gaining Weight - I used      to be thin, lean, and in seriously good shape.  I prided myself on my emaculate eating      habits and flaunted around my body.       Now though I am ashamed that I have fallen into the masses of      individuals still struggling with their weight.
2. Shame of Public Opinion – People think      that fat people are gross.  No, you      don’t have to say it to their face – but their overwhelming appearance lends      itself to stigmas that they are lazy, overindulging and sedentary      individuals.  Wether or not these      things are true seems to be unimportant because in these days there are      tones of ways to manage weight.
3. Failure to Fit into Normal-Sized      Clothing – I can’t take the fact that when I walk into TjMax I have to      sho in the large section or by size 10 pants.  It keep coming back to me – why do I      have to struggle with my weight white most teenagers are enjoying their      slim bodies?  How come I have to      already shop in the womens section when my peers still fit into kids      clothing?
4. Sizing in Stores isn’t Universal –      Unlike Men’s clothing – wemon’s clothing is particularly fickle.  In each store a ‘0’ is a different size –      let’s not forget that some have more room in the but, or around the      theigh, or perhaps are slimin the leg.       So I could pick up a 10 in one store and then a 16 in another and      the 16 would still be smaller than the 10.
5. Looking in the Mirror/Trying on      Clothing – Not only am I faced with the fact that non of the numbers      are all that ‘normal’ but seeing myself in the mirror as I try on pants –      that if I’m lucky –jk- are too small!       I’m a fat pig.  Then someone      else comes by and tryis on a 4 four, or worse still youfind that your      older sister lost some weight as in a size 4 now!
6. The Reality that There is no Quick Fix      – sometimes knowing that something can change over night makes you feel a      bit better – makes you have a great sense of hope.  So if someone said you could lose those      30 lbs over night perhaps as you were faced with looking at yourself – you      could say “This to shall pass.” And be able to not break down.
7. Overwhelming  Sense of Time Lost – Now you have to      tnhink of all the time that you spend “trying to lose weight”.  This could be weeks, monthes, or years      prurhaps.  It during this time or ” that a single thread of you mind always comes back to “I still      need to lose weight”I’m fat” or “My sister is smaller than me.”  You ask yourself how many public events will I miss because I can’t take the thought of being overweight? Or how many jobs will I fail to apply to becuase o f my weight?  How many friends will feel negleted because I am afraid that they will think that I’m inferior becausse of my weight?  When will I be sexy again?
8. Experience of a Normal Childhood Seems Inevitably Impossible      – Then you looked at this time and say – what sort of life can I gather      from always measuring my food or packing lunches – its not so much that      food is essence to having fun in life – its not.  However there is a certain freedom that      comes with “not having to worry about food” that is priceless and makes      the world seem like some endless possibility.  You never have to make sure to pack that      chicken breast or cook that ½ cup of brown rice.
9. Unfortunately No Amount of Therapy Can      Make You forget “you’re weight”.      – it seems like a global fascination – weight and appearance.  Who can make each other skinnier and who      can have the leat bodyfat.  This is      not to say that I don’t want to do so – or that people who do it are      wrong.  It’s just think about how      many individuals are saying “I have to spend 4 more weeks dieting” – its’      as though they’re going to spend their lives “Dieting” or “Trying to Lose      Weight”.

It seems that my life is so hectic that I can’t let go of food as my coping mechanism.  All I can think of is: shit!  I used to be in shape and I feel like I should give up trying to get back into it.  I can’t seem to lose weight at all - I suppose I know why, but its frustrating never the less.  I’m embarassed to go out in public…sigh.  I just don’t want to feel like I need to be in shape to be liked…I’m so lost.

Today I didn’t aim to be perfect like I normally do. Instead I said that I would limit my calories and made sure that I didn’t eat as many as I did the day before.  That is less that 3000.

I did about 1800 today. Didn’t pick that great of foods. I’m absolutely not hungry - which I mean is a first.  I read a whole bunch about hormones and yes - today and yesturday I kept myself extremely well fed.  My problem was probably an extremely low leptin level because I wasn’t eating well and fasting often.  So by doing this I’ve pumpped them up - trust me.  It’s the first time that I sit here pretty damn sure I’m not going to eat something - I’d much rather be doing something else!

Today was my self-study.  That is that I let myself have whatever I wanted and then disected it.  So yeah, I didn’t eat anything all that good for me and I managed to learn several things about myself:

• I like breakfast, afternoon snack, and dinner
• I don’t get hungry for lunch
• I don’t eat breakfast till about 7ish
• I like fat-contain foods, little protein, but I like fruit, milk, and oatmeal. I don’t particularly like plain-sugar.

Well this morning I did a 45 minute walk with intervals ~3 mins at 3.7 and then 4.0 at a 4.5% incline. I really wanted to start running when it went up to 4.0 so I tried really hard. Occationally I would find myself locking my knees out and holding my body still - not good! so then I would focus in on my music and start up again.

The first three songs on my tape didn’t help me when it came to speed walking, so I ended up cycling on "Bad Boy" by Cascada which is one of my favorites and has a strong quick beat (its techno/dance).  It was good.  This afternoon I’m going to do some weights.

However I forgot completely to warm up - so it hurt for the first 10 minutes or so.  I did warm down.

Getting up was difficult this morning because I think 9:00 pm for bedtime is too early.  While I was tired I still tossed and turned.  Anyways I’ve done clean-eating so far!  I’m really excited, this is Day 2 of Level 0 of my program, so the work is not quite there.

Now I have to go write a paper - so cya.

__

I did my workout and I met another one of the Y-trainers.  He was probably the person I should have talked to in the beginning.  He knew what I was talking about when I asked him about Whey Protein and also helped me with the trainning.  Afterwards I probably had a little too many carbs in my drink - but I wasn’t quite sure what to do.  I decided that post-workout I would have 3 scoops of Cytocarb and 1 Scoop of Whey Protein Powder.  I made up my shake for Monday because Friday i’m off.  Hopefully it will stay in the fridge.

Well tonight I had an urge to binge.  I did eat dinner early by about an hour and my evening snack by 30 minutes.  I tried to stay on target but I had homework today and it seemed that was my problem.  I didn’t eat more than planned.

Tommarow I can’t do HIT first thing in the morning and I have a lot of homework to catch up so I’m going to do my Level 2 menu (which is fewer cals) and get some of that work out of the way.  Anyways the GYM doesn’t open till 7:15 and I want to program myself to wake up earlier.  I’m not a fan of waiting for food, as you can tell so I don’t feel like waiting two hours and not eating - so… tommarow is a rest day.

Level 2 Meal Plan:

Meal 1:
½ cup Oatmeal w/½ Scoop of Hydrolized 100% Whey Protein Powder, 1/3 Egg Whites, 1 whole Egg

Meal 2:
½ cup Lentil Soup, 6 Almonds, 2oz Turkey or Chicken

Meal 3:
1 Medium Yam, 3oz of Salmon, 4 Steamed Broccoli Spears

Meal 4:
Growth-Mode Shake Toned-Down (1 Scoop Cytocarb II + 1 Scoop Protein Powder)

Meal 5:
3oz Chicken Breast, 1 tsp Healthy Oil*, 5 Baby Carrots, 8oz Non-Fat Milk

Meal 6:
½ cup 1% Cottage Cheese, 1 Green Apple

Decrease in Egg Whites, Brown Rice, Oatmeal, Salmon

Increase in Broccoli