Gotta love the whiners
Does anybody else know someone who is constantly starting and stopping workout and weight-loss programs and then complaining about his or her lack of progress? Does anyone else find this behavior annoying or frustrating?
For as long as I can remember, a friend of mine has been telling me how dissatisfied she is with her weight and body. Nearly every month, she is telling me about this new workout regimen or diet she has adopted. Then, a couple of weeks later, she is telling me that she had to quit because the workouts were causing her too much physical pain or the diet was making her miserable. She tells me the plan, which she had been so enthusiastic about just 2 weeks earlier, wasn’t a “good fit” for her. Then, within a few weeks, she is telling me about another workout venture, one which she will be abandoning only weeks after she begins it. This cycle has repeated itself over and over with very little variability throughout the past several years.
What I find funny is that she wonders why she never achieves the results she desires and why she can’t find the right workout and diet. In fact, she complains about her lack of progress and has asked for advice on several occasions. My responses have always been the same. I tell her that there is no magic routine or magic diet. I tell her that getting in shape takes hard work and sacrifices. It requires consistency and dedication to reap results. I emphasize that the process is not very enjoyable most of the time, but that the outcome will be well-worth the effort. She seems to listen to what I have to say, but before long, she’s back to her counterproductive cycling. The first time she relapsed it was hard to hide my irritation; I wanted to force her to heed my advice. However, the more it happened, I started to care less and less. I figured out that getting irritated with her wasn‘t helping her or me. I realized that I couldn’t make her listen and I couldn’t force her to have self-discipline and dedication. This had to be her choice. Since coming to these conclusions, I’m better able to support her and offer advice (when she asks) without becoming visibly frustrated or annoyed. Now, I just smile, offer the truth, live by example, and hope that she will eventually figure it out.
August 28, 2007 at 2:39 pm
I absolutely find this frustrating and disgusting. I wrote kind of a harsh blog on this very same subject today!!
August 28, 2007 at 2:42 pm
Amen. I also think that a lot of time people set unrealistic goals, or even if the goal itself isn’t that unreasonable they want them to come too quickly. It’s a lifestyle, not a hobby. It’s habits and reconditioning. All you can really do is be the best example you can and keep giving advice until she actually is able to be self sufficient. Or at least stick with it long enough to start seeing some results and get addicted and want more.
August 28, 2007 at 7:50 pm
omg i can relate. it seems like everyone of my friends are jealous but they can t stick to any kind of exercise or diet. and sometimes they get mad at me when i try to help them. oh well. gotta love em right. lol
August 28, 2007 at 8:06 pm
I dont pay attention to whiners. Friends or not, there isnt enough time in my day to deal with whiners. Just like you said, you offer advice and 2 weeks later they go back to whining and making 0 progress. So, I dont waste my time with these people. If friends of my start complaining I just change the subject or ignore them till their done. I quickly grew tired of people using up my time for nothing. You are much more patient than I am and I applaud you for that.
August 28, 2007 at 8:33 pm
Tell the whole truth…u r her friend..tell her you luv her..but just tell the truth. Maybe if she hears it enuff she will be motivated to make a change and stick to it. But I agree with the other, your much more patient than me also!
August 29, 2007 at 6:39 am
Sounds exactly like my mother.
August 29, 2007 at 7:15 am
I work in an office with 6 girls ages 21-24. I’m the only guy. Everyday I listen to these girls talk about how fat they are and how they want to change. They all joined golds gym for some body pump work out thingy. The next day, they’ll sit at there desks all day. Never getting up just to walk around and for lunch they’ll order super sized MC. D’s. Through out the day they’ll eat various candies and snacky food. And then the following week they’ll Bitch about why they didn’t make it to the gym or complain why they haven’t lost weight. I feel your pain. My girls go through this cycle all the time. It get’s old hearing about.
August 31, 2007 at 5:00 am
I experience much the same at work where my coworkers will ask me what they could do to tone up or build muscle and I tell them watch what it is you eat and what types of exercise would help. When I question them periodically or when stuffing their face the answer of I dont have time or it slipped my mind never surprises me.