@*$&#*!!!!!!!!!!
i couldnt think of a good title but that pretty much sums up the way i’ve been feeling. i weighed myself this morning and i’m up to 115lbs, which i’m sure to many doesnt sound like much but i’m up 10lbs since my competition…which is really comes as no surprise to me. ever since my show my diet has been freakin horrible!!!! my binging has been scary, the worst it has been in years. i’m happy to say that i figured out the reason behind it and i can stop it. i wont bring everyone down with all the details but in a nutshell, during my contest prep i was so focused that it consumed my mind/life…nothing could sway my attention, now that my contest is over all of the shit (drama) that i ignored basically just kicked me in the stomache and it has been overwhelming to deal with all at once and i was using food (binges) as a diversion. the good news is that i know why i was doing it, which means i can correct it and get back on the right track. i’m going to look at the brightside…maybe some of those 10lbs are muscle 
whew..i hate being a downer, so exhausting! i am super excited about my new training program that i started this week, its a 3-on 1-off split and I AM FREAKIN SORE!!!! certain parts of my body never get sore, but i am happy to report that my ENTIRE body is aching…i’m moving around like im 100 years old–LOL!! with my new program, i started logging my workouts in the ‘workout tracker’ since that seems to be more organized than my ripped up notebooks. i have to say, i am not totally thrilled with the tracker…when i log dumbell exercises should i just put the weight of one db or the total of two??? hmmm, i dont know! what the hell, i know what i mean and i guess thats all that matters…LMAO!!!
i am a silly goofball that loves to make fun of myself and not take life too seriously, its been a rough couple of weeks and im happy to be feeling better…more like myself. things are looking brighter for me!! i hope everyone else is still kickin ass, cause i’m back on my game! 
November 15, 2008 at 8:09 am
i wouldn’t worry too much about that little rebound, i’ve heard from countless people that after a contest when your body has been so deprived for so long it is in the PERFECT state to build muscle and you can take it lax on the diet for a little while and make very good gains
that’s when you’re body is holding so much water you can like poke your ankle and the skin stays indented for a time. Def was not fun.
just don’t eat so much crappy food that you end up with pitting edema…which i did
and whenever i was doing the workout tracker and on my paper logs i add the two dumbbells in dumbbell exercises but i think it’s pretty much personal preference
November 16, 2008 at 1:12 pm
I just put the weight of the dumbbell. Or when you enter in the weight it still allows you to put words so you can put something like "40ea". Sounds like your new workout is killer! I’m sore today as well. I crave that feeling!
November 17, 2008 at 7:26 am
oh man nic… that’s how i felt… i think i even said something to the effect of, "i hope you can handle being off competition better than i can!!!" it’s like that allowance to go off the diet a LITTLE makes you forget where a little ends, right!?! i was always the most disciplined person i ever knew competing, but as soon as it was over i slammed on 10 pounds too. if you look at the chicks in oxygen though, it’s not uncommon for their on/off season to varry by 10 pounds so that might help you feel a little better. i think it’s super hard to find that balance of dieting for life. competition, it’s like you say… you can FOCUS on it as a priority….
it’s good to know others out there go through the same thing… hang in there… it takes a while to even out.
… feeling for ya….
November 28, 2008 at 2:44 am
I’m late with reply to this one but that doesn’t make you any less of my little freaky, funny, goofball!!!
I know u back on track by now(except for holidays which is FINE) and kickin ass!!! And DO put one dumbell weight in tracker, unless u using diff weights with diff arm!!!!LMAO
Tracker is good…Diet tracker is even better, but I suggest you don’t track back what you ate back in da binge days for you might fall under even more deppression!!!HAHHAAHAHAAHAHA
Luv ya and looking after ya as always!!!!
D.