Never Again..
Will I date someone that doesn’t work out.
I’ve dated a range of ‘types’ of guys. I’ve never wanted to categorize people by what they do. I’ve always tried to look at their personality more than anything. So I’ve dated a handful of guys that really aren’t into working out. I’m over that now. I’ve hit the final straw on that one.
No matter how much they say they understand. No matter how much they say they support me. They never do. They’ll never ‘get’ it. All they want is to reap the rewards. "I’ve got a hot girlfriend." Yet they’re jealous of the time I spend in the gym. They don’t like that I have to be so structured with my food. That I have to carry a food scale and a cooler with me. That I can’t go out to eat. That the first thing I plan in a day is when I can get to the gym.
This is my passion. And they’ll never understand that passion if they don’t have it in themselves as well. They’ll never accept ME if they can’t accept WHO I AM. And the gym, competing, this sport, that is WHO I AM. That is what I’ll always be. This is what drives me in my life.
And then there’s the physical and health standpoints of it. If someone doesn’t give a damn about their health, that goes against what I’m doing with my own life. Physically, if I want to touch muscles, I shouldn’t have to resort to just touching my own. I’m not a big chick. And I don’t want to feel like I am. I don’t want to feel like I could overpower a man. That’s not right. Yeah, physicality itsn’t everything. The body only lasts so long. But when it comes down to it, physical attraction does play a role in things. And I don’t want to have to constantly ask myself, "why doesn’t he care about his body?"
Arrrgh. It shouldn’t be so hard to find someone with the same ideals and dedications that I have.
November 28, 2007 at 9:52 pm
I’ve come to find out muscle heads and gym rats are a rare bread, those truly committed to the fitness lifestyle. People don’t understand that you would rather train than part,y rather diet than dine and rather feel good than feel full. Body Building.com is a great site for like minded individuals. I’m glad I found like minded people on here. Great blog by the way. Some great points you have in there.
November 28, 2007 at 9:55 pm
Preach on girl! haha. im not as strict w my diet as u are mainly cause im still tryin to gain mass but ive lost many relationships to the "i dont understand why the gym and eatin are so important" line. if the dont get it, then they obviously dont get me so im better off wout em. so i know where u are comin from..some ppl dont get it bc its not their passion or important to them. they think its just a hobby and not a lifestyle..but dont worry ull meet someone with the passion and lifestyle.. plus ppl who care about how they look and their health are hotter anyways lol
November 28, 2007 at 9:58 pm
If you don’t share that common thread before the dating begins: most likely that common thread will never surface. Thoughts from the hazy…..
November 28, 2007 at 10:21 pm
I agree… it’s not just you, I put lifting above relationships and make sure they don’t get in the way. A lot of time they end up not getting in the way because the relationship ends…
And ya know what? I’m better for it…
More power to ya, keep up the good work!
November 28, 2007 at 11:04 pm
You said that it shouldn’t be that hard to find someone with the same ideals and dedication that you have. It’s hard, no matter what it is that "floats your boat". Being a bodybuilder makes it twice as hard because, as you so eloquently point out, it’s a commitment that can’t be cast aside or ignored.
I support your decision to put your passion first. You can’t make anyone else happy, unless you, yourself, are first happy.
Good luck in your search, and happy lifting and competing.
November 28, 2007 at 11:25 pm
take your time to find the person. the person need not be a great bodybuilder but he has to be someone who REALLY accepts your lifestyle and have no absolute agreement to your training regime.
I know couples who sports different jobs but they accepts each other’s lifestyle, training regime and value gym. that’s good enough.
December 2, 2007 at 10:45 am
I think it is safe to say, a couple who does not work out together, does not work out. The committment to your own health and physical progress is too great, if the other person is not making the same gains, there will be problems. fortunately, those problems will show up very early, so you don’t have to worry too much about long term relationships going bad.
December 2, 2007 at 7:55 pm
you’ve said exactly what needs to be said. Its a time that can be shared as well. I train with my g/f and she enjoys it as much as I do. She has recently told me that she cant imagine dating someone who doesnt look after themselves now. Much respect to your blog. I hope you find someone who you can truly share your passion for fitness with
December 13, 2007 at 2:32 pm
Preach Neely, Preach,
Good luck.
unfortuantely, i understand. it goes the same way with dating women that don’t workout. i gave it a try and i even went as far as they just needed to be active-sports, jogger, etc. but like you said, everyone says they will understand, but in the end they never do. Gym is the first thing i think about when i wake. I wake up first before going to work and if i make it to the gym late due to traffic, then i go work late- my workout comes first. I even go out to eat but there is very few things that i can eat. I say this to say that i understand. No one but a gym rat will understand people like us here at Bodyspace. Just stick to gym people. I admit it limits your selection of men, but at least it increases your chances of finding someone that has similar interest to you. And as for the muscle thing. I like to see wmen with some muscle on them. i love you fitness women. here in atlanta, women have more of a southern shape. Thick and round. Hooray for muscle. In teh islands, we say that a little bit of meat on your will keep you warm in the winter. I rather have a fit women and a very thick blanket