So I am 12 lbs away from what I consider a good place to walk around weight. I definitely lost almost all the work that I did on these legs of mine. But reality came and smacked me in the face. My last post sounded like I had a grip; but I really didn't. I was still yo-yoing in emotions, and that was definitely seen through my eating. I was still weighing myself every day and obsessed in the mirror. It took a wisdom tooth surgery to make me get a grip on reality. I had never weighed 130lbs in my entire life! In highschool I was 145; and have always carried a lot of muscle. So to think that without staying on a competition diet (which is not a realistic diet to keep for the rest of "my" life) and spending 3hrs in the gym isn't realistic. And I had to get out of the gym for a while, I was soooo worried about what others may say if they see me gain some weight back. I was totally obsessed with the wrong things. Lastly, I was on the verge of throwing my finger down my throat. COMPLETE and UTTER NONSENSE, cuz I know better. So I can truly say that wisdom tooth surgery saved me from myself. So now I am back to regular life and when I fail, it's okay. I plan on competing again this summer, I was originally looking at the spring but the summer is more realistic. So the goal now is to eat REAL food, no fake food. Clean eating is my goal..not just for competition but for life. It may sound funny but one of my goals for 2011 is to totally eradicate Doritos from my diet. No Doritos for 12 months! Listen that is a struggle, I LOVE THEM. They truely are one of my weaknesses. Last night was my first challenge and I passed. My son had a bag of Doritos and we were snowed in. I just wanted to eat one but I drank water instead. I kept telling myself no and I made it. I will almost be three weeks into my challenge..and not one Dorito. LOL, thats a feat. See ya soon: