...which camp are you in?? I'll be honest. I've had seasons where I was in the "self-love" camp and many more seasons of the "self-loathe" camp.

I was on FB today and a friend had posted a video of themselves in the mirror just a posing and it got me to thinking...it seems to be socially acceptable to talk down about yourself. And people who walk around with confidence and actually "LIKE" themselves are called arrogant. My question is why?? Why is it ok for you to tear yourself down, but not ok for you to lift yourself up??

You have to love yourself before anyone else can truly...so why not walk around and tell yourself that you are beautiful, special or unique??? I use to have a practice of giving myself a daily affirmation about why I was good, special, unique, etc. and I liked myself a LOT more then.

I'll admit, here lately I've been in the "self-loathe" category a lot more. I've been looking at what's wrong with me instead of what's right and good. And what has it gotten me??? Nothing except bouts of being depressed.

It's ok to love yourself!! Time to start practicing love and get back in that camp!

Have a great day everyone!

Peace out!
M

Good morning peeps!!

Today was legs and man oh man what a beat down!!! (insert wicked grin!) I'm going to be feeling this one for sure!! Already starting to stiffen up!!!

But the thing that rang true to me today, is I'M BACK!!!! For over a year I've just been going through the motions and trying to stay on point with eating, yadda, yadda, yadda....and as I was crawling out of the gym, I thought to myself DA*M that felt good!!!

And then it hit me, you are on fire again!! Meals on point, exercise on point, but most importantly, my BRAIN is on point!!! People don't factor in how much of a mind game this can be at times! But I definitely have the FIRE in me once again!! I can't wait to see the results at the end of the 12 weeks!!

Find your FIRE everyone!!!

Peace out!
M

...I want to be" And that's when I said that is right!!! If I eat the way I'm suppose to and put the effort in the gym I'll get the results I want period. It's as easy as that lol!!! The # on the scale is insignificant because there is a point where our bodies say this is my optimum....and that's what I'm working towards not a #.

Have a great day everyone!!

Peace out!
M

Morning peeps!! Happy Friday!!!

There is just something about 2013 that is different...feels like it's my year!

I have been on this journey since Jan 2010, and I have had ups and downs for sure. Lot's of living going on and choices made. Lots of ups and downs and lessons along the way.

When I started this journey in 2010, the reasons were very personal. I was in a pretty dark place in my life. Not going to get into all of it, but something had to change. I worked hard in 2010 to get the weight off. Didn't know anything about clean eating, was just doing Weight Watcher's, and the weight did come off but I still wasn't where I wanted to be.

I started really being active on here later that year and met some really amazing people! They all helped teach me about lifting and clean eating and then I found Tosca Reno's book and when I made the change to eating like I am suppose to, really saw a difference!

With 2011 came a lot of changes and tragedy in my life. There was a 3 month stretch there that if I was able to work out it was a good day. Not because I didn't want to, but because I was traveling back and forth from hospital to hospital. My sister-in-law was in a coma and my aunt was dieing of cancer....I lost my aunt but thankfully my sister-in-law came out of the coma and is thriving! I worked out when I could and kept my eating clean.

Fast forward a few months and that had me moving to a different state and starting a new life. Workouts were still on track for the most part, but the eating was very lax at times. I'd have periods of tightening up and would see results, but then I'd slack off again. No one else's fault but my own. MY choice. This roller coaster lasted through all of 2012.

So when the end of Dec 2012 was nearing, I started thinking about what I wanted for 2013 and for me for a lifetime. That had me analyzing what I had been doing when I was at my best. versus what I was currently doing. So I started making changes. Decided 2013 was going to be MY year to be FABULOUS!!!

But here's where I had the Ah Hah moment..this time, the reason's for doing this are different. Still just a personal, but for a more healthy reason. And here was THE AH HAH moment....Rick and I were talking yesterday about how much we each wanted to loose and it just came to me...I had read in Tosca's book, if you eat the way you are suppose to and do the work in the gym, there will come a time when your body says "this is the weight.....

Morning everyone!!

2013 is the year for me to be FABULOUS!!! But it's also the year to push myself and work on some of my goals I've always wanted to. My main goal is to increase my flexibility and be able to do some of the harder yoga poses that I have never been able to.

So here is one I think I have down so far. The next goal is to be able to get my legs over at a 90 degree angle while still holding the pose.

Have a great day everyone!!

Peace out!
M

Morning everyone!!

I have a lot to talk about today. Workouts and eats are on point and have been the last 3 weeks. Week 1 I cheated a lot, so my results aren't what I was hoping for, but I can see progress.

I am planning a cheat on Sunday since it's Superbowl Sunday, but I have found clean cheat versions of what we'll be eating....chicken taquitos, buffalo shrimp dip, my homemade salsa and guac. Bud 55 for the beer so it's a cheat, but not as bad as it could be.

Yesterday was a very emotional day for me. A very close friend of mine, close as in I think of her as my sister, called me to let me know her cancer is back. She's 39 and a single parent. The cancer she had originally, was a very rare form. They only know of 8 other people in the world with it, so they treated her and put her in a program to monitor her every 3 months for the next 6 years.

So she went through the treatment and a year later they told her she was cancer free. Last week was time for her 3 month pet scan, and they let her know yesterday that she had 2 spots on her lung and a large spot on her lymph node of her sternum. So she is going to MD Anderson's in Houston next week for biopsy's. Please keep her in your prayers.

Back to training....next week I start Phase 3 of the PFD program with Steve Poynter. I'm very excited about that because I'm anticipating DOMS for every part of my body!! This will start the 6 days a week portion....BRING IT ON!!!

And last but not least, today I am "officially" old....my youngest turned 20 today!!!

Have a great day everyone!!

Peace out!
M

T G I F!!!!! Happy Friday peeps!!!

What a great week this has turned out to be. And I can honestly say it was my week to turn the tide, so to speak.

I started out this month with starting the $100k challenge. I am now in the beginning of week 4, and I can honestly say my results, though not bad, are not what I was hoping for. So I asked myself "Why??".

Well, here are a few of the reasons...I cheated on my meals...yeah that about sums it up. Not the eating, but the enjoyment of a nightly wine or 2 to unwind.

So when I reported in to my trainer, I was honest and told him I had cheated the first 2 weeks. Didn't try to make excuses. He came back and told me to stop it. Stop sabatogging my progress. So that got me to thinking. Why do I think I need the nightly wine??? What was I doing in July 2011 when I was at my best that I'm not doing now??? What am I doing know that I wasn't doing then??

And it all kept coming back to drinking the wine every evening. So I asked myself, "what is tripping that trigger???"

When I stepped back and thought it out, it was basically, every day I am getting really bad headaches. My job requires me to do a ton of research and by days end I'm wiped out. And it finally dawned on me, the stress of it is what's causing the headaches. Ok, so then came the question "Why" because my job hasn't changed. What have I changed that is allowing the stress to creep in. The answer...I have stopped my daily meditation and breathing. I use to take 30 min every day to just set and relax and take deep cleansing breaths and meditate. This would destress me and relax me almost as much as yoga does.

So on Tuesday, when I felt the headache coming on, I put on my headphones and listened to my meditation music and just took 30 minutes to breathe deeply. By the time the music was finished, I felt destressed and the headache was gone. And I have repeated this every day this week with the same results. So yes, this will become a daily practice for me once again.

So my question for you is this...if you are struggling, what is tripping your trigger?? Once you know, you can work to fix it!!

Have a great day everyone!!

Peace out!
M

Morning everyone!!!

Man, I had the ultimate blonde moment yesterday! lol!! I thought I was at the end of week 4 of the $100k challenge all day. I woke up this morning, looked at the calendar and said OMG!!! You are such a dork! lol!!
Oh well!! Gives me another week to make it happen! lol!!

Yesterday was a break through day for me on many levels. I have been stressing a lot lately and we all know how stress affects our weight loss. But the one thing I've been suffering with for a few months is afternoon headaches...really bad ones. It finally dawned on me, that I had quit my meditation and breathing practice and it was around that time that the headaches started happening. I internalize my stress.

So when the headache started yesterday, I put in my headphones and turned on my mp3 player and just listened to my meditation music and breathed....long, deep cleansing breaths. By the time the music was finished, the stress was gone and so was the headache and I felt more at peace than I have in a long time.

With the stresses of this life, it's important that we take the time to just breathe. Find something that helps you to relax and gives you a sense of peace and try to do it every day.....take time to breathe!

Have a great day everyone!

Peace out!
M

Morning peeps!!

Well, today was progress pics/stats day and I was happy and upset at the same time. Down in inches but up in weight. So I went ahead and took the progress pics and was once again happy! lol!!!

I can see a definite leaning out and fat loss so all is good!!!

I have been doing kickboxing/dancing for my cardio and here is a video of what went down today.

http://youtu.be/OFWGLxggnRw

Some serious calorie burn with this all while having fun and ending with palates/yoga to stretch everything out!

Have a great day everyone!!

Peace out!
M

Morning peeps!!!

Well, tomorrow is the end of week 4 for the challenge and progress pic day and measurement day. I'm really nervous about this. The first 2 weeks I cheated on the meals. Not gonna try to hide the fact I just did. Last week I was on point with meals and workouts. It was a good week.

Well, this week will be my breakthrough week. This will be my battle of the mind week. I have a hard work schedule ahead of me....12 hour days. And by the end of the day, my brain is always fried. My day job involves a lot of research, so by day's end my brain pretty much is done lol!! And we all know when we are beat down like that, that is when bad choices are made.

So the question I have to answer is "How bad do I want this??" This is the week I will have to put on my big girl panties, pull them up and say suck it up buttercup!! Just do it!

Here's to big girl panties!!

Have a great day everyone!

Peace out!
M

Happy Friday everyone!!!

Today was pull/abs day and I can tell you I'm already feeling it in my back!! I've been doing assisted pull-ups and yowzer!!! (sp) lol!!

We ran out of time for cardio, so at lunch I'm going to do 30 min kickboxing to get it in. Tomorrow is off from lifting so the plan is to do an hour session of kickboxing for cardio day!

We have been garage saleing, Goodwilling and Salvation Arming and Craig's listing for all the furniture in the new place. We have made some FABULOUS finds!!! It amazes me what people get rid of when they move!! So anyways, we've been searching for just the right bar stools and finally we found them yesterday on Craig's List! Wrought Iron with cushioned seat and SO beautiful!!! Can't wait to pick them up tomorrow!!

Have a great Friday everyone!!

Peace out!
M

Happy Wednesday peeps!!!!

Man I am feeling great right now!!! I just finished a 45 min kickboxing class off of Youtube. Took me back to my roots in karate and by the time I was finished, sweat was dripping in my eyes!!! LOVE it!!! But it also made me feel powerful!!! I haven't felt that in a while. Don't get me wrong. Lifting makes me feel powerful, but when I was taking karate all those years ago with my kiddos, I felt powerful in a different way...kinda like I could go out and kick major a**!!! Not to mention it is a kick ass cardio workout....literally!! lol!!!

I've been doing a lot of thinking about every aspect of my life the past few days....setting my goals for 2013, etc. For those of you who don't know me too well, I have the privilege of working from home for corporate America for my day job and my second job, or as I call it, my artistic relief, is photography.

This means I'm home all day if I'm not out shooting a wedding, portraits, etc. So that means I can hang out in my pj's all day if I want to. Now, as wonderful as that sounds, it can become very "easy" to not, how do I want to phrase this, fix yourself up. Hair up in pony tail, no make up and pj's...

Now I know that sounds wonderful, and there is a time and place to just vegetate like that don't get me wrong. But if you do it every day, it kinda messes with your psychy....or at least it does mine. And this is a habit I have gotten in to the last few months. With all the hours I was putting in for corporate, 12 hour days 5-6 days a week for the last 4 months, I didn't stress a lot on my appearance.

Well, that is one of the "things" I'm going to work on. I'm going to make it a point to NOT put back on my pj's after the shower and fix my hair and put on some mascara and eyeliner. I don't wear a lot of makeup unless we are going out. But I really do feel better if I make that much of an effort.

So here's to feeling and looking better in 2013!!

Happy Hump Day peeps!!!

Peace out!
M

Morning peeps! Just now getting a second to breathe from work!

Well, I finally had a meltdown moment yesterday. Yesterday afternoon, I decided to go through my progress pics and find when I was at my "best". I have been taking pics since I started my journey in 2010. My whole goal right now, is to get back to that time and better!

So I started going through pics, and the more I looked, the madder I got. Now, when I get mad at myself, I cry. This was not a pity me cry, this was I can't believe you allowed yourself to do this to you!! Basically beating myself up!!

So why did I allow myself to digress?? Oh, I could make tons of excuses, life, moved across country, getting use to a new relationship, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah!!!! But what it boils down to is, I CHOSE TO EAT BAD AND NOT WORK OUT AS HARD!!!!! ME!! I mad the choice!

So where does that put me now?? Well, I'm 20 lbs heavier than I should be. I know part of that is muscle, but probably on a couple pounds of it.

That is where I am currently at. It's not pretty. But here's the thing. I know what to do to correct it. I'm working with a fabulous trainer to help me get back to my former "better" self. What have I learnt??? This is a daily thing that I have to do for myself. Daily! I have to eat proper daily!

Is it ok to allow yourself a cheat meal once a week?? YES!! Just not every day like I have been doing.

So now I'm on the journey to be better period!!! Hope ya'll stick around and enjoy it with me!!

Peace out!
M

Morning peeps!! Took my measurements this morning and was very pleased! I'm down 1.75" in my waist and 2" from my hips. I don't know my weight because I'm avoiding the scale. Not because I'm scared of it, but because I'm in the muscle building phase of the plan that stevep78 of Fitness Poynters has me doing. I'll weight myself of Wednesday the official weight in day.

I've been thinking a lot about my "overall" goals I want to reach. 2013 for me, is about being FABULOUS!!! So what does that mean?? Well, I think for me, it means setting goals sure, but mostly, I want to just be better. There are certain poses in yoga I have never been able to achieve. I want to strive to do some of the more difficult poses and do them correctly....I guess just pushing myself. Pushing myself in every area, but not forgetting to enjoy myself in the process.

What goals are ya'll setting for 2013??? Let's make this our year everyone!!

Peace out!

M

Morning peeps!!! I know why my workout plan is called PFD...psychotic fat destruction. Every FREAKIN' muscle hurts!! LOVE IT!!!!

Yesterday was rest/cardio and I did a lot of different cardios to try stuff out. I get bored with my cardio really easy. Today was the push/cardio part and by the end of it, I was ringing wet with sweat. I had sweat dripping from every hole in my body I think!!

I love that feeling of getting in there and leaving everything I have on the floor, literally!!

Dear Lord baby Jesus, I'd like to give thanks for hot tubs, foam rollers and the massage head on my shower....without these things I would not be mobile today!!

Have a great Thursday everyone!!

Peace out!
M