miked512’s BodyBlog

No, I haven’t read Nate Green’s book.  Not yet but it seems like an interesting read.  Maybe after my next supp order.  Who knows?

At any rate, this post is about one of the most annoying side effects of being in shape, lifting weights, and being bigger than a lot of people.  Its not having people move around you, treat you like they’re intimidated/afraid of you, the soreness, or having to squeeze a lot to get through tight spaces.  Its being asked to help people move.  I now have a rule where if no one asks me directly, I’m not going to volunteer.  I’m going to let you know I don’t want to do it but I’ll do it because I’m "your friend".  I won’t even ask others to help me move.  Why?  Its annoying first of all.  Second of all, using people as props because they’re not strong enough to move their piece of the furniture but they can hold a piece of furniture that just happens to be too big (but not too heavy) for you to wield by yourself.  So you’re moving them around like a rag doll.  Not only is this annoying, but its also humiliating to your human prop and thats just sad.

Is that the only real function of all this muscle we train so hard to get?

No, its also useful for pushing vehicles out of the road on your way home from work.  I’ve always considered pushing/pulling vehicles for distance an effective form of GPP or high intensity cardio for those of us too lazy to do real cardio.  Unfortunately (or fortunately), today on my way home I see a truck in front of a line of motorists waiting or swerving past this truck with the one human attempting to push a truck out of the road.  I decide to pull over, and help this poor human move his truck out of the road before he gets killed or worse, the dumb atlanta motorists all pile up in a line and start honking their horns.  I see him, the truck moves back and then starts to roll back toward him.  I completely surprise him by making my debut and pushing the truck on to the side of the road.

First thought in my head "Wow, I need to start doing this for GPP again.  And get bigger vehicles too.  Damn, I’m a sick psycho."

LOL, so we have us a long, lengthy discussion about marriage, selfish motorists, and how he forgot to get gas and managed to run out, and the like as we drove around to a gas station to fix his truck and the like.  It was an interesting 10 minutes of my life, he thanked me, and well, went on our merry ways.  Oh well, as I was typing this I realized, I’m really glad I DON’T have to use this muscle everyday for life or death situations other than training.  Geez, and I thank the men and women of past and present for making this type of life possible.  You know who you are?  Too numerous to name.

Ha ha, so why don’t you all tell me about your "function" stories?