LovelyLady’s BodyBlog

You know, I’ve taken Hydroxycut and Hydroxycut Max.  My fiance loves taking his Hydroxycut Hardcore.  Now we find out that there is a recall on the products because of possible links to liver damage.  That does not make me happy at all.  In fact it makes me feel like I should go get a check up.  Mostly I’m feeling leary because the other day my son asked me how come my eyes look yellow.  Now this recall.  It all just makes me nervous.   I want to say I’m just tripping, but maybe a peace of mind checkup is in order anyway. I am overdue for an annual physical.  Oh well…..   :{

You know, I’ve taken Hydroxycut and Hydroxycut Max.  My fiance loves taking his Hydroxycut Hardcore.  Now we find out that there is a recall on the products because of possible links to liver damage.  That does not make me happy at all.  In fact it makes me feel like I should go get a check up.  Mostly I’m feeling leary because the other day my son asked me how come my eyes look yellow.  Now this recall.  It all just makes me nervous.   I want to say I’m just tripping, but maybe a peace of mind checkup is in order anyway. I am overdue for an annual physical.  Oh well…..   :{

I’m getting older, but no qualms because I’m definitely ending this year off looking better than when I started it.  I can celebrate my birthday without the backfat, and that’s always a plus!

I have a goal to get down to 115, and I am almost there.  I haven’t been a hundred and twenty anything for years.  After my five year old was born my weight hung out around 130.  So this is a really big moment for me.  I forgot to check my bodyfat in all of the excitement, but I prefer to do that in the morning before I’ve had my water and breakfast.  It’s really cool, because earlier this week I had a serious bout of not feel good itis because I had another backslide.  Plus my baby didn’t feel good for a few days- that means my house was hell for me,lol.  Anyhow, I guess I couldn’t handle all of the stress, shin splints, I’ve had a bit of a tough time.  I started having problems with a growth on my leg, and nausea to boot.  I said to hell with it and saw someone.  Turns out that I shouldn’t be drinking whole milk.  That’s what kept making me sick.  My nutrition consultant had me start a food diary recently, and I’m glad for it, because without it we wouldn’t have been able to pinpoint the problem so quickly and easily.  I thought my problems was carbs, but it’s not.  I stopped using milk for my protein shakes. No milk.  Everyday, I feel better and better.  It’s only been a few days.  It’s amazing to me.  If someone had asked me a  week ago, I would have said I don’t have any dietary restrictions….HA.  I should be able to eat yogurt, but I’m a little scared now. lol. I haven’t been nauseas or had a headace since I left the milk alone.  I don’t want to ruin it even though I’m pretty sure I can eat the yogurt and be okay.  My body reacted so well and quickly to dumping milk.  I didn’t even know I was bloated?!?  I didn’t know I had a bloating problem,lol.  I just thought my stomach was fat because I had kids. At least I didn’t have to do anything stupid like cut out all carbs.  Especially fruits.  My doc scoffed when I mentioned cutting carbs.  It was like what do you think vegetables are.   I might not have made it two days anyway.  I love love love my fruits. and I like having oatmeal for breakfast.  Heck, I may even add a little sugar every now and then since I know my problem is with milk.  It’s crazy, because right now I feel like I stopped taking poison or something.  I just don’t know how to explain it.  I’m excited.  I’m happy.  The other side of the sad coin is soooo sweet.  Oh yeah, I was prescribed sleep.  Like I didn’t know something would be said about my sleeping, or lack of.  The past few days, my teen helped by watching the girls in the morning and letting me sleep since my tot routinely stays up past 2am no matter what time all of the lights go off.  I’ve gotten 7-9 hours of sleep that way.  Did I mention in any of my posts that I have a great son…  We can’t rely on this routine, but it will work for a few more weeks, and that’s all I need right now.  It’s amazing what a tweak here and there can do for a person.  Hell, I’m eating super great, I’ve been busting my ass with workouts.  A setback just did me in….All I have to do is just change my diet according to my body changes using the advice I got from the doc and I should be good.  No crazy crap involved!!  And this guy isn’t even a nutritionist!  Just someone who’s into the body like that.  Most doctors could care less about fitness and such.  There’s always some out of shape M.D. advising someone to exercise and eat healthy.  How ironic!

Holy Cow!! I went to a Gold’s Gym to have my weight taken and get my bodyfat measured.  No big deal right?  I figured my BF was going to still be 22%, but it was 20% !!! It blew my mind.  I almost met my goal of 18% bodyfat!  My weight isn’t all low in the 100’s, but my bf is nice right now.  In this short amount of time, I accomplished so much.  It’s just not wrong to be proud of myself at this point.  woooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Basically, I’m supposed to weigh in once a week and report my new weight and mail a photo to my fitness consultant.  I keep stepping on the scale though.  And then I go nuts if the number raises.  Yes, I know weight fluctuates throughout the day, I know I shouldn’t step on the scale every time I think about it, but a crack head also knows that crack pipe is a big fat no-no.  That’s what makes it addictive.  I don’t want to do it, I shouldn’t be doing it, I’ve been asked not to do it, but I just can’t seem to commit to staying off of the scale for very long.  Meeting this goal is so important to me.  I have to do it and I have to do it now!  And it doesn’t help that the weight is not peeling off like I want it to.  Even if my  bodyfat dropped and my weight didn’t change. I would be a happy camper.  I don’t take my bodyfat all of the time.   I know that I need to lose another 10 pounds or so to see a real change in my BF.  Just 18%.  That’s all I want before I settle down and take it one day at a time.  I need to lose 4% of my current BF of 22%.  I’m getting there.  I’m so close it’s making me crazy! I’m eating every 2-3 hrs. mostly fish, veggies and fruit.  I learned to use the treadmill!  I shake things up.  I lift.  I can do everything except be patient!  Beat that! ;}

So, it looks like I won’t be wearing a two piece on the 4th of July, or ever for that matter.  My body is shaping up nicely, but my stomach refuses to tighten up.  I will continue to lose weight, and maybe I will eventually find a half way decent set of abs.  I am definitely eating well, maybe I just need to be more patient.  Either way, all I know is that next summer I am going to be ridiculously sexy.  I decided to get back in shape and it’s actually happening.  I meet a new goal each week.  If I were younger and didn’t get pregnant so many times, I’m sure I’d have abs right now,lol.  If I find out that the "damage" to my midsection can only be fixed with surgery I won’t have it done.  I will stay on track with my training and healthy eating.  And I will learn to accept the jelloness of my abs as a badge of honor.  After all, there are women who would do anything to have babies.  If I had to go back in time, I would still have my children.  Besides, it was actually a choice to let myself go during my last pregnancy.  I thought it would be so easy to get back in shape, especially since I spent most of my life trying to gain weight.  Little did I know.  One thing is for certain.  I have a different type of respect for fat women at the gym….

Oh my god!  I want to say I can’t believe it, but I worked hard to pass that little plateau.  It’s been a good while since I weighed 130anything.  Actually, it’s been over two years. The summer of 2005 right before I got pregnant to be exact.  I’m 138 now, and I’m proud of myself.  I got so fat carrying my baby.  And then I was in the 160’s for a good while and it depressed me.  My son told me he was proud of me today.  He said I’m doing a good job getting back in shape.  Man, I wanted to cry,lol.  My belly fat is melting away.  My baby used to like poking my belly.  She thought it was funny.  She would say "pokey belly".  Her elbows don’t rest in my belly fat when she sits on my lap.  I just feel good right now.  I like wearing my body now.  I still have some work to do, but the difference is that it’s fun again!

Know what?   I keep beating myself up, but I looked at my bodyweight chart and realized that I may not be doing so bad after all.  Between May 3 and June 8 I lost a total of 10 pounds.  That isn’t so bad.  Right?  So let’s see what happens between June 9 and July 9.  Yesterday my family went to the track for a little running.  Running on the ground is nothing like hitting the elliptical.  I was really considering buying an elliptical, but not anymore.  I did 5miles in 40 minutes on the elliptical Saturday.  When I got on that track yesterday, it was soooo hard to run around.  This morning I tried again, only I ran in the street.  It was a walk/run.  It wasn’t even far.  I was only outside 10 min, but I did something other than sit all morning….I don’t even want to think about doing cardio later.  But my off days are wed and thurs so oh well.   

I wake up every morning wanting to look like Alicia Marie, or my former self.  I know it won’t happen by magic, and I know my age, and I know I’ve been out of shape for two years, so I can’t expect to get back in shape overnight, but none of that means anything right now.  I watch the Biggest Loser and I swear they have it so easy in a way.  Stop eating pizza and twinkies for breakfast and all of a sudden start eating good and working out;  Heck yeah the fat will melt off.  If I could lose ten pounds next week and still be healthy, I would be all for it.  Do they work out for five or six hours per day or what?!?  And, the longer I stay stuck at 141, the more I feign to get back down to an itsy bitsy waistline just to show my body who is in charge!!  Before I felt that if I just toned up pretty good, or gotten in the 130’s that I wouldn’t care about my weight.  Now, I’m not so sure.  I guess maybe I feel like I have something to prove.  It is possible for a tired, flabby, out of shape mom to get her sexy back.  And in a bikini!!  None of that size doesn’t matter crap.  It matters all right.  Especially when your belly outshines your butt and your breasts.  My body has nil balance.  Little breasts, BIG belly and small hips  WTF?!?  I managed to get rid of the backfat, but that belly is hanging on for dear life!  I’m actually dieting, and it’s hard and it makes me crabby.  I want to be sleep now, but I can’t because I’m hungry as hell, but I don’t want to give in to snacking so late.  I have a diet set up for me by a respected fitness guru, but geesh.  That doesn’t mean I won’t get hungry and want to pig out on a truckload of fruits and cashews.  And at this point I do have to limit my fruits, as backwards as that sounds.  Some people tweak out on Mcdonald’s.  Me, I lose it over the taste of a sweet cherry.  Fruits are my Kryptonite.  What am I gonna do!  I have to lose this flab and I need to lose it ASAP without getting lipo.  If I get any surgery, it will be implants so I can finally have some boobs!