lovejones596’s BodyBlog

Did I mention that my progress is slow? It’s slow, real slow, molasses slow. I look at myself in the mirror and say "ya know, my waist looks a little smaller." I do the 3 stomach poses… the relaxed, the semi relaxed and the suck it in. I look at it via front, then turn to the side and think, "yeah, I do look slimmer." Then I wip out the measuring tape to see what the numbers show…drum roll… nothing! nada! zilch! My hips went up 1/4 inch! Maybe that’s why my waist looks smaller! UGH!

I will begin my "bulking/building" phase next week. I am excited and bummed at the same time. I’m looking forward to building muscle. Not looking forward to getting bigger. Most people will not see my muscle, they will just see me get bigger. Not to mention, my waredrobe sucks as it is now, it will only get worse. I will REALLY have nothing to wear and I’m not going to want to buy anything… I doubt I will lose much fat during my building stage. UGH again.

I just need to eat clean during this time, enjoy a little cheat here and there and we’ll see were I am at in a couple weeks. Hopefully then I will have some pictures to post. I’m too chicken to  post my before shots before having something for my current shot. Besides, if someone from work comes across this, that is the last thing I want them to see!

Well, hope everyone has a great day. Eat clean and stay healthy.

For those who don’t know, my best friend is Julofthenile. She is the one who got me on this site and has convinced me compete in a figure competition in April. Anywho, she will be competiting in her first tomorrow. I’ve watched her completely transform her body. It’s amazing, from no muscle at all to a buff momma. I’ve witness her struggle with cheez-its and how she overcame them, watched her work through injuries and now turning an interesting shade of burnt orange. I started to think of my upcoming journey and I ask…what am I getting myself into? Can I really do this?

The other day we looked up when the competition is—April 5 and there is another April 12; I may do both. We counted back 12 weeks for leaning. (Jan 12) I would like to do a cleanse before I start leaning so that’s 5 days + 3 days to get back to regular eating, that brings me to Jan 2. Then I need to ween my baby girl. I feel guilty just thinking about it. I need to be done with that by Jan 1, before I start my cleanse. Going back 9 weeks for building brings us to Oct 29. That gives me 1 week to eat without guilt. To enjoy what I put in my mouth because most likely I won’t be eating them again. Good bye chips ahoy. Good bye Breyers ice-cream… all flavors. Good bye PB&J’s. Good bye lays baked chips. Good bye pepsi. Good bye mashed potatoes. This is my last week to enjoy you and I won’t taste you again until the end of April (or maybe never again). This is probably my biggest goal ever. I’m excited yet terrified at the same time. I told my husband that after next week, we no longer can have any of these things in the house and he said "what about the boys?" and "you’re going to make me suffer?" Well, misery loves company, so yes, he will have to suffer and regarding the boys, its better for them too. We just have to come up with a better dessert for them. Can I really do this?

If the diet thing is not bad enough, I will have to get on stage and walk half naked across it while people judge me. The last time I was on a stage was my senior year in high school for my variety show. That was in ‘86! (I didn’t do very well) I’m sure I can walk across like a robot, but I don’t think I would score very high if I did, so I really need to work on my confidence and stage presence.

Then there is the "tanning" thing. Cheapers! I am naturally tan, and I plan on tanning some before the competition… but that JanTana stuff is nasty! I’ve been applying it to Juls and its on my hands…it’ll be a couple of days before it comes off.

I do look forward to the building stage. We are going to try the body auditors routine – 1 body part a day, with only one working set, work until failure (see his blog for details). I just don’t look forward to possibly puking. I hate throwing up!

One thing that I’ve learned from Juls is that it’s a process. It was good to see her go through it so now I at least know what to expect. It’s going to be an interesting journey but I look forward to getting there.

Ok, why do we use fruit to describe our body shape? I am an apple and my friend Julofthenile was a pear (she has now moved to the vegetable category and is more of a celery actually more like a carrot, now that she has that fake tan stuff on for her competition this weekend ). Who started all this anyway? Fruit is healthier than lets say doritos or a cheese puff… Imagine what other options there are to describe someones shape. A dorito could be someone that has large shoulders but no butt, "thick" in the center could be a cookie, your own flavor choice. Or maybe a potato, how about a butternut squash for the larger hip person or wine glass for the "apple" shaped person, larger in the center and twigs for legs. This could be fun to think of what other things that can be used to describe a persons shape. What are your thoughts?

I haven’t been to the gym for one reason or another since Tuesday. I was able to go rollerblading pushing a double stroller on Thursday. That really kicked my butt. I felt it every stride. It was great to do it. Got the heart pumping and my 4 year old was rooting me on. Actually, he was more interested in getting to the park. So today I am heading back to the gym meeting up with my girl. Not sure if I’ll be doing legs or back since those where the two days I missed (Wed and Fri).

Gotta go, baby girl is awake.

Ok - this past weekend my husband’s car died. It will most likely cost $2,000 to fix. We don’t have that. Nor can we afford to have a car payment. Tuesday night I woke up at 1:30am and wasn’t able to go back to sleep. I was trying to figure out what we could sell off. Other than our children (which are not for sale) we really don’t have anything. I’m stressed. Really stressed. And if you know me, you know that I don’t stress. At work I may be under the gun, people are running around me shouting, mayhem everywhere and I will be cool as a cucumber. But Tuesday night (or more like Wednesday morning) I was stressed. I tried to figure out how I could keep my goal. These protein powders are expensive, chicken is expensive. I feel guilty buying a club pack of chicken and eating most of it. Is reaching my goal possible? My gym membership is ending and will need to be renewed. I’d like to stay at my current gym because of its proximity and the people. Anyone have any suggestions on how to do it economically? I’ve prayed about it and am not as stressed as I was yesterday. Just waiting for Him to answer. Once again, I just have to be patient.

Due to my lack of sleeping I missed out on my workout that morning. (I was attempting to sleep but got none) so last night I went for a power walk with a co-worker. It was good since we were both able to vent about work… which is another issue I’m dealing with but I’ll save that for another day. Today I have off so I plan on putting my 2 youngest in my double jogging stroller and going rollerblading. Tomorrow is a leg day. I like leg days.

That’s it for now.

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After browsing through this site I began to think about goals. I know people that are totally goal driven. They make goals for everything from their everyday life to their jobs. Me on the other hand, am not. Don’t get me wrong, I do make little goals. You know the usuals, graduate HS, graduate college, get a job, not kill my kids after they’ve been screaming "momma" 200x in a minute. I achieve small goals like getting laundry done before we run out of underwear or drinking enough water for the day.

This goal of competing in a figure competition is a big one. A dooser. I think I haven’t set any big goals in the past because I was always scared of failing. If I did set a goal, lots of times I wouldn’t tell anyone, just in case I didn’t follow through. Well, this is out in the open. Many people know and I keep telling people. What am I doing?! I’m really going to have to do this! I guess another reason I set this is because next year I turn the big 4-0. Something about that number makes people a little looney. When I turned 30 I really didn’t care. 40 is another story. I guess I am being my mid-life crisis. You change the way you think. Granted, 40 is the new 30, but after turning 30 my body didn’t respond the same as it did in its 20’s. Lots of things happen to you in your 40’s. Especially women. You know… the "season". I’m not sure if I should be excited or terrified. I know my mom started early and from my memory, it wasn’t pretty. I’m rambling.

So with next years big birthday looming I figured I would set a crazy goal. Why the heck not. You only live once. I hope to get there. It’s kinda scary. I guess only time will tell.

I did 270 on the sled…. I did 270, I did 270! I mistakenly wrote in a previous blog that I’d done 225. I was counting the bar as 45. I learned that you don’t count that. So this morning we wanted to see if I could do it, and I did for 12. So we added more, and then some more and finally 270 which I did for 6.

So, I’m feelin’ gooood. Today was a good leg. I was pushed and I worked hard. Feelin’ good. My legs were pumped and I could see definition under the layer of ice cream and cookies. Next I have to work on the ice cream and cookies. That will be the hardest.

After trying the all one side workouts… didn’t like so much so we’re back to doing 2 body parts. This morning was Back and Bi’s. Really good workout. Unfortunately for my baby girl, I won’t be able to pick her up because my arms are noodles.

I finally uploaded a picture of me… ok a part of me. I am very proud of my calves. Actually, my legs in general but my leg shot wasn’t very good. So now all can see I am a real person with skin not a goofy cartoon. I realized that I don’t have many pictures of myself. I’ve always avoided being in pictures since I don’t think I look good in any of them. Not to mention, I never liked the way I looked so I avoided the camera. So on this crazy journey I am going on, I plan on documenting my progress. So far nothing visible (I’m not posting my befores until I have a good afters. That is how bad they are. I am very embarrased!) but I have noticed that I am getting stronger. I have also noticed that my pants are getting tighter in the thighs which would probably freak most girls out, but I know I am building muscle so that will happen. I’m also coming to the realization that I’m not going to shed most my fat until I stop breastfeeding. The amount of time I spend at the gym would show more results otherwise. It’s very frustrating, but I’ll just have to deal.

I’m also concerned about my abs. Near the end of my pregnancy I noticed that I had diastasis recti – split abs. Normally your abs will come back together again. Some women’s muscles never come back (since no one told them how to fix it) and they can put a fist in the stomach. Pretty nasty. I’m not sure if mine have come back together completely so I’m laying off the abs and going to make an appt. to see my doc.

That’s it for now. Had a great cardio day yesterday. Did the stair stepper which I truly HATE, but it did change it up and made me sweat… alot.

Ok - I’m feeling like the fat kid with glasses that is the last to get picked.  Here I write in my blog and the only person who has commented is my best friend. It’s like your mother telling you "Oh sweetie, you are beautiful despite having braces, frizzy hair, are 30 lbs overweight and slurp while you talk." Oh, and someone name Lexi (thanks lexi).

I know this blog really isn’t about being read or "popular" but… you can’t help but feel like a loser.

Anyway, enough whining. Yesterday started something different with my workout. I’m super setting to keep the heart rate up. Yesterday, it was all front; quads, chest, bi’s. Today it was all back; back, hams, tri’s. It was nice to do something different but the jury is still out on how effective it is. Still waiting for my "layer" to go away. Even just a smidge. My husband claims that he has a 6 pack. It’s just well insulated. I have a couple gallons of breyers that are well insulated.

Tomorrow is cardio. Lately I’ve been switching up between a spin bike and jumping rope. I actually like it. I was getting a little bored with running on the treadmill. Maybe one of these days I will go out for a run. I really did enjoy doing that last year. I would go out around 5:30 and watch as all the houses started waking up. It was pretty cool.

Adios for now.