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levidity

"I want to be healthier and stronger in body, mind, and spirit. I want 2009 to be a vast improvement from how I have lived my life."

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levidity's Stats for June 2008
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Archive for June, 2008

Humbling

Tuesday, June 24th, 2008

so I did my measurements and I am way depressed now because I’m still at my same weight but I am way bigger now. My ass is huge according to the tape measurer but my old man doesn’t complain don’t expect he would but I’m in a self loathing mood which does good for me becasue now I’m going for a run. Then spending quality time doing everything on my wii fit which sickly enough I love. Need to up my cardio bad!

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I’m fat and unhappy

Tuesday, June 24th, 2008

By most standards you probably wouldn’t call me fat, just average, which I hate. I’m 5′3" and around 117 (today) I used to be pretty tight now I am not and I am sick of it. It took almost a year to get through this self loathing mood and having such a "busy" life and using it as an excuse to not be able to work out. Bullshit! No more excuses. Now I just need a hard kick in the ass. My boyfriend is not very supportive because he’s on afternoons so we barely see each other so now I need a complete stranger to be like I’d do ya, that would make me happy. But I’m writing mainly for myself because if I post this for the whole wide world to admire than maybe I’ll quit making excuses and start making changes. I know I’m not fat but I’m not healthy either I make horrible food choices and now am paying for them with squishy thighs and weird back fat that I’m not sure where it came from. Oh yes one more late night trip to taco bell. I guess I have already screwed up sticking to an amazing diet today by starting the day with coco puffs but there is always tomorrow or the rest of today I should say. Here is where I end my rant.

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