kermane’s BodyBlog

So this weekend we built a volcano with the cubscout troop. I have never paper mache in my life but it turned out looking like a volcano, so mad props to The Brady Bunch, which is where I remember seeing a paper mache volcano and had the idea how to lay the paper.

Sunday we went canoeing for 2 hours. We were in parts of the river with lots of woods on the sides at times and if I’d heard banjo music I think I would’ve burst out laughing.

Its very hard to push a canoe with probably 400# weight with just a paddle in shallow areas but we did it, I expect to be in pain with my shoulder tommorow since it takes 2 days for DOMS to hit me.

On the trip I wondered why tanned fat looks better than pale fat? Is it because its cooked? I mean think about a steak, with some fat on it, uncooked it is disgusting, cooked not so bad to look at it. HMMMM……..

Saturday night we watched UFC and I wondered exactly how you have to hit someone on their chin to knock their ass out. I mean that might come in handy, some witch pissing me off a store, BAM I knock her on her ass. Of course then I’d have to get my ass out of there before the police arrived but oh what fun it would be to knock someone out cold.

I’ve knocked someone on their ass before by punching them in their gut, but never out, maybe that’s something to work towards???

Also during UFC I watched the guys flex their pecs, imagine if women did that, OMG the wrecks we could cause making our pecs moves, ROFLMAO.

I’m kinda tired, can you tell? My mind is all over the place.

Today was cardio, 2 seperate sessions: 20min Fasted HITT on my treadmill

Later 30min ss cardio on my treadmill

I’m obsessed with reaching 1111 miles on the damn thing, I’m at 1049 right now.

I can’t drive 55. All sounds good to me. I know when I’m by myself in the car on some back road, I blare my music and drive like the Devil is chasing me sometimes. Did that on the way home tonight, I really am meant to have a convertible and live somewhere warm where I could drive with the wind blowing my hair, ahhh bliss.

It dawned on me today I’m very impatient with everything. I have no idea why. I want things to change asap, not slowly, could explain why as a teen I was bullimic. Also explains my frustration on how long it takes my problem areas to go away.

I also realized today I’m a big time body watcher. I’m looking at flabby bellys bouncing, butts hanging out of their suit, and shaking my head, I want to say "do you have any idea how long it will take to get rid of that???"

I also admire well toned bodies, for the muscle. I’m a muscle watcher. Sounds pervy, wonder if there’s a support group for it.

Anyhow after battling with my checkbook and finally balancing it I worked out.

20min hills on treadmill

circuits

squats: 145×8x3, w/calf raises: 145×10x3

rdls:100×8x3 w/good mornings: 70×8x3

butt squats: 90×8x3 w/lunges: 90×8x3

5min stretching with Bob(he’s missed me, poor guy)

Went to my friends 40th surprised birthday, she was surprised, only real gag gifts she got was from her hubby her turns 40 next year, paybacks a bitch.

no it’s not coffee! Are you insane? Do you want to see me on the news holding White Castle employees hostage forcing them to make me coffee? Besides I don’t think my 3 cups of coffee in the morning are that bad for me.

No I’m giving up my beloved berry paradise extra gum. I’m too addicted. I’m a true addict looking for my fix. Getting nervous and antsy if I’m out, snapping at clerks when they say they don’t sell that particular flavor. I’m afraid if my behaviour keeps out they will have posters at certain stores of me, barring me entrance. So I’m going cold turkey and I will probably not be pleasant to be around for 3 days.

I think its the fake sugar crap they put in the gum that addicts you, then makes you a beetch when you stop chewing it. So if it effects me like that what is it doing to my cells in my body, so better to have good honest real sugar occasionally then any of the fake stuff.

I did legs yesterday: squats,calf raises, sumo squats, standing cable kickbacks, squats with feet together, cable adduction.

Today was back/bis

20min HITT on rbike

circuits

seated shoulder press: 20×6,23×6, 28×6

supine pullups: 10×3

one arm db rows: 28×6, 33×6,38×6

back ext: 15×10x3

seated military press: 15×6, 20×6, 23×6

supine chinups: 10×3

15min ss cardio on my treadmill.

Had our last official ballgame last night, now tournaments, Thurs thru Saturday. So we hit the pitching machine place. My kiddo can hit great if you pitch to him, but has trouble with a pitching machine, did very well today listening to me and he hit several balls. Need to work on swinging quicker so not as many fouls. He’s been working on bunting and did great today.

Just getting reading to do my thousand squats, wish me luck. My shoulder is acting up with the weird drop in temps, so no pullups or pushups or my right arm would be dead weight and I’d be on antiinflammatories and muscle relaxants(though that might be nice for a good night sleep)

Not the remake, man I’m so sick of remakes, what’s next a remake of Saturday Night Fever? The Breakfast Club? I’m talking the original Friday the 13th with Betsy Palmer. "Hurt her Mommy, hurt her"

We went canoeing today. We’ve had a canoe for a couple of months but my hubby and son have went out in it not me. So today I got to go out in it. I wanted to wear my sneakers, but hubby pointed out they’d get wet, well I should’ve worn them, the only other shoes I had was velcro sandals.

Going down the hill carrying the canoe was not a big problem, though my hand kept hurting(more on that later) So I stumble in, then my son, then my hubby and out we go. Every little shake and shimmy freaked me out. I kept thinking man if this thing capsizes I can’t think about myself, got to worry about the kiddo.

So we’re sitting out there in the middle while those 2 try to fish and I just kept picturing, the final scene in Friday the 13th where the counselor wakes up in the middle of Crystal Lake in the canoe, sees the sheriff, and her hand is drifting in the water, and out pops a young Jason Vorhees and he drags her under.

Going back up the hill killed me, my shoes sucked, couldn’t get get foot grip, and my hands kept getting tired. Hubby was frustrated with me and I didn’t blame him, here I am a big workout Queen and I was struggling with the dumb canoe up the hill.

On the way home he asked me where I held it, I realized I was only using my fingers and letting my hand hang like the canoe was luggage and not the 100lb thing it really is. Tommorow I’m buying some decent canoeing shoes.

Anyhow I worked out today, got interuppted by the roofing guys, who caught me in my sports bra and Wild One sweat pants, lol.

5min wu on rbike

circuits

bench press: 90×8x3 w/french oh press: 20×8x3

narrow grip bench press: 70×8x3 w/cable pec dec 30×8x3

wide grip bench press: 60×8x3 w/cable flys: 30×8x3

20min HITT ON ellpictical

10min ss cardio on my treadmill, no fat suit, was too worried the roofers would need me for something.

Hit the pitching machine place with the kiddo and we practiced bunting then back home and got ready to swim. normally I’d just walk from my back yard to the pool in my suit but after the roofers seeing me in my workout attire I didn’t want them to see me prancing around in my string bikini so I wore a tank and shorts.

That’s what I musta had posted on my lower legs while out fishing with my family Friday evening, anywhere I missed with bug spray got bitten. I have a grand total of 20 bites from one night, now how in the Hell did I go all week at cubscout camp, in the marshlands with no damn mosquito bites. They bit thru my socks, my shorts, my shirt, nasty vile creatures and right now I want to literally scratch my legs off my body.

Today I start my own personal Labor Day challenge I took measurements and hope in 11 weeks to see some big changes.

Today was cardio only, but first I took my cat to the vet, Saturday she was gone all day, then tried to put some whoop ass on me that night when I petted her. Now this is the friendliest cat ever, never growls or bites, but let me tell ya Saturday she was in some pain and was going to whip my ass if I petted her right leg.

Sunday she hid behind bushes, but today she was doing better, so I scooped her up and off to the vet she went to find out she had a sprained leg and I had to give her pain meds. Now dogs are pains in the asses to give meds to, just imagine cats, but since she was feeling better she took it no problem.

Speaking of dogs, my dumb assed dog got sprayed by one of those damn skunks! Then the damn skunk was in my shed where the hose was, so Chelsea got some skunk away put on her, her cage drug outside and she slept outside in her cage, for 2 reasons; 1. I was afraid she’d get sprayed by the psycho shed skunk again, 2. She’d crawl under our fence and disappear.

AFter 4 treatments of skunk away, the first given at 11pm Friday night, 3 more on Saturday and 2 baths she was able to come inside that evening.

Sunday, my hubby worked at COSI and the kiddo and I went to visit and check out the sites, tried crawling thru the submarine they had there, where I promptly conked my head, God bless the people who work in subs because I’d think I’d go crazy being in the small space, constantly ducking down.

Anyhow: 30minutes of HITT on my treadmill, was going to do 10min ss on my rbike but the roof guys showed up and I had to move my cars out of the driveway, in my stinky sweaty workout clothes, I’m sure they were impressed with me, lol.

I’ve been at cubscout camp with my kiddo. Early morning workouts and usually I’m too tired to post but I just wanted to point out to some who might be starting their workout journey that being in shape comes in handy.

Case in point today, our den found another den’s flag. I carried the 2 flags for most of the day before the other den found us. The den leader was like a rabid beast, came barreling at me yelling at me to give the flag to him.

Well I didn’t for the simple reason that when you find another den’s flag unattended that den has to sing a stupid song to get it back. This guy was trying to hurt me for the flag, 2 women with him came running up and started grabbing both flags and you know what?

I didn’t let go of either, in fact I pulled them both away from him. Why? Because I was in better strength health then him or the 2 women. I think I freaked them out but damn it, our den was looking forward to the other den singing "I’m a little teapot"

I think their den leader thought we stole it, we didn’t. We literally found it laying on the ground by Old Stinky(outhouse) no one from their troop around. Plus he’s the brother of a cubscout big lead. My den was impressed with me, lol.

Prior to the altercation my den was tired from hiking up cardiac hill, a 65 degree incline hill, with me leading, in fact the leader had to blow the whistle twice for me to stop and her to catch her breath.

That comes from cardio vascular health and all the HIIT I’ve done.

So don’t get discouraged, keep trying because you’ll never know when you have to fight off a rabid den leader.

Yesterday was legs, today was back.

Tommorow should be chest. No cardio since Tuesday, figured I’ve been going up and down the hill at full speed so that’s my cardio.

For a moment I had to stop and stare and make sure I wasn’t looking in a mirror. No, not a mirror. I was at the pool and I swear a lady there had my old ass. I recognized it right away. The huge butt smiles.

You don’t know what butt smiles are? Think where your ass hangs and leaves a smile. some have big old Smiles you can post on a billboard, others have no butt smiles at all(lucky butts).

Next thing I recognized was the saddlebags. You know open them up, put all your stuff in them. Yep use to have them. Along with the potted hamstring. You know where its so full of cellulite it looks like a mine field that exploded.

I felt bad for the lady, but not so bad I’d ever what my old ass back. I try and trade my current one in, every 3 months for a newer, more "youthly" looking one.

I tell ya, if I had any clue when I was 21 that my metabolism would take a nosedive at 30, I would’ve been lifting weights then. No, I was young and thought who needs muscle when I can be Jane Fonda and cardio myself to death.

But I’m older and wiser and now know how great lifting weights is and no I do not look like a guy disguised as a woman.(Think Buffalo Bill in Silence of the Lambs, you know in that dance scene?) that’s what I use to think lifting weights would do to my appearance.

So this coming week should be interesting, will be getting my ass up early Tuesday thru Friday to get my weights and HIIT in, the kiddo and I have cubscout daycamp, hopefully we’ll get to do fun things. We tried a cubscout hike with his pack and the woman running it wouldn’t let the kids run, check out leaves on trees, etc. We had to walk in a march like we were in a parade.

Yesterday was just biking with the kiddo, today was swimming, active rest so to speak I guess.

I watched He’s Just not into you. Ugh. I mean I don’t want to have to check 10 sites to see if someone’s into me and get rejected on all of them. I’d rather just say if I was a single woman that is "hey you want to go out sometime" then the guy say "sure" or "no thanks"

I mean WTH. I feel sorry for single people fighting the dating war. I’d just stay home, and watch me some nice "adult" movies and take matters into my own hands so to speak.

Thankfully I have no single friends anymore locally, now on the computer I have quite a few and to them I wish all the luck in the world in finding that right one, or even the one good enough for right now.

My kiddo’s birthday was Wednesday, hard to believe its been over 8 years ago I was in labor, I still remember those labor pains and my hubby saying "wow that looks like a bad one" as he looked at the monitor. No I didn’t punch him out, though I thought about it, I realized he was just really getting into the whole thing.

So anyhow Wednesday I did: back, biceps and HIIT

Thursday I did: chest/tris/ HIIT and a little ss cardio to rake up miles on my treadmill

Today was legs: 5min stretching

circuits: butt squats: 85×8x3

          lunges: 20×8x3

sldls: 110×8x3

donkey kicks: 20×8x3

pause squats: 100×8x3

cable atf squats: 70×8x3

knee ext: 110×8x3

froggy curls: 50×8x3

5min stretching

Also did 20min of mind blowing, sweating like a HOG HIIT on my treadmill, yes I’m a mile wanting fiend on my treadmill, you’d think I’d win money they way I’m trying to rake up the mileage, I’m at 1021miles on it.

out of the water, not the sky. Had on my favorite bikini from last year at the pool, went swimming, dove under and as I’m coming up, my suit  bottom is going down, thankfully I realized it before I stood and mooned everyone, but still. I’m bummed that my favorite suit is too big in the bum area now, I’m sure my hubby will just shake his head when I say I need more bikinis, I’ve become a bikini pack rat, some people buy Jimmy Choos, I buy bikinis.

Anyhow this weekend sucked, major strife, etc. spilled over into Monday, but today back on schedule with workouts

20min HIIT on ellpicitical

circuits

free bar squats:100×8x3

calf raises(toes in,straight,out):100×8x3

sumo squats:90×8x3

outer thigh lifts: 20×25x3

Leg press on Smith: 200×8x3

steps ups: 15×8x3

sumo deadlifts: 95×8x3

standing cable kickbacks: 40×8x3

followed by 16min ss cardio on my treadmill in my fat suit.

Lots of running around today, so its flown by. Tonight is a ballgame, hope the kiddo has fun, its a night game 8pm.

Being as its summer, thoughts pop into my mind that have to do with summer.

like why does the guy with the beer belly always wear his shorts, under said beer belly, does it let the beer have more room?

Or why does the lady who looks like her skin is leather insist on baking herself in the sun even more?

Why do people who have leather skin show it off? Its gross, its dead looking meat, but that’s my opinion. Nothing wrong with a tan but damn when your skin looks like leather you have a problem.

Or why is there always that woman, you know the one, who insists on mowing her yard in her bikini even if its only 60 degrees? And furthermore why is it whenever I see someone doing that, they are a little too big for the bikini and their boobies swing at their belly.

Why is it ok for a guy to be a hairy beast, like King Kong and be half naked in his shorts or swim suit and no one goes "OMG how nasty" but if a woman has a little stubble poking out of her suit its the end of the world.

I thought about this stuff while mowing my yard today, have to entertain myself.

I worked legs today, they should kill me tommorow, its been over a week with no workout for them.

circuits

squats w/lunges

sldls w/good mornings

squats w/feet together with knee ext

rdls w/hamstring curls

20min HIIT on rbike

First day of summer break here, and we’re going to go hit a park up, its a beautiful day, hope the weather is nice where ever you are too!