Kristine’s BodyBlog

Sometimes I eat really clean , and sometimes not.  Sometimes I will have a stretch of training that will be really consistent, and sometimes I will go a couple of weeks and not exercise.  As I get older, I can’t BELIEVE how much I feel this affecting me.  When I go two days without training, I feel moody, terrible, and more lazy than ever.  When I don’t eat properly, I feel drained, exhausted, sick.  And yet, I’ll be "doing good" and then think, oooh such and such a food sounds good, or hey life is crazy and I will take today off.  And always, every time, I regret it.  I regret it at night, and I really regret it the next morning, much like most bad decisions.  I feel like, for my own sanity (and the safety of those close to me-ha ha ) I have to cut the bulls@*& and realize that I am doing this for my life, not for a weight loss, or to look better, or whatever.  I also need to find a good balance, instead of throwing myself into a program that takes hours away from my family, or my work, or anything else.  Just fit it in, make it work, and whatev.

I think that logging back into bodyspace and bodybuilding.com will help a lot, because I know the way that I want to be, and half-@ss is not it.

The past couple of weeks have been great, I lost 3 pounds last week, and look forward to keeping it going.

What I mean is, I am about to begin one.  I would probably classify the last few weeks as a plateau, both physically and mentally.   This week was better than the past couple, but… ya know.  Starting tomorrow I am beginning a completely revamped routine and I would just like to start seeing some visible progress again.  I am going to stick to my plan 100% and just see where it takes me… I’d like to lose an additional 30 pounds, give or take.  But mostly I’d like to get on routine again, and stay on routine.  I miss the gym, even though I’ve been going, I’d like us to get a little more serious again

It’s cool to see a bunch of the girls on here that are, give or take, about in the same boat as me.  Of COURSE we all used to have super tight bods, and then real life happened, and obviously it is so possible to refocus and get those bodies back.  I think its nuts, these people with 5 or 6 kids and jobs, and still look bangin.  It makes me keep my mouth closed when it comes to excuses. 

Whatev.  I always start rambling on in blogs.  Oh wells…

This is what I hate:  whiny, self-pity blogs.  People saying they can’t do something, and then giving 4, 5 ,6 reasons why not.  It’s easy to find excuses… RIGHT??

But- admittedly-I have been having the same narrative playing in my head the past couple of weeks.  MENTALLY… I just can’t find the drive to really pound it out like I did the past couple of months.  Which to me, is such a bummer.  I feel right on the cusp… like, I finally made it to a lower weight than I have been in years, and then I just kind of petered out… I know I WANT to make progress and get to where I am going but each day feels more like a stand still than a step forward.  And I just haven’t been able to amp myself back up, shake it off, and get back on it the next day.

Again, I am putting too much analyzation into it now.  But sometimes you need to get it in writing to hash it out for yourself.  SO… admirable people don’t just talk… THEY DO!  So what I am going to do is-

1- Immediately start adhering to my diet plan again

2- Immediately resume exercise regime AS DIRECTED!

3- CUT THE BULLSHHHHHHHH**

I refuse to feel bad about myself and keep self sabotaging… I OBVIOUSLY know I can do it.  I have to admit, I pretty much killed it the first couple months.  And the quote I love is… Ain’t nothin to it but to do it.

So, I have the day off tomorrow and I am totally gonna buckle it down.  WATCH OUT… I’m back.

Ok so I realize that in my former life I would never be celebrating a weight this high, but I officially have broken into the 160’s … at 169.  It has been sooo long.  Well, it has been like over 4 years at least, officially.  I feel like I am in the home stretch.  Or at least that I have overcome the toughest mental obstacle and now everything else is gravy.  I am feeling fantastic.  And 169 was even a mid-day weigh in.  So… awesome.

Also, I saw a dress in a shop window downtown that I HAVE to have.  I am gonna check it out tomorrow (the store was closed tonite)  I saw it on my one hour run/walk with my husband.  WAIT, let me mention.  My husband had gotten up to 185 over the winter.  He started working more and in less than two weeks, he dropped back down to like 174 with NO effort/diet/execise.  So.  Nice.

Okay so even though this week was definitely not tops, I feel like I am back now.  I only lost one pound this week.  I am surprised I even lost that.  I was back in action big time at the gym today though.  I am a little disappointed in myself because I really wanted to lose at least one more pound to make it into the 160’s this week.  My new short term goal will be to lose 5 pounds in the next 2 weeks.  I know I can do it. 

I was just burned out this week from a combination of everything.  After 7 hardcore weeks, I took one less hardcore week this week.  Instead of my 9 cardio sessions, I only got in 6.  Still not too bad.  And I hit every muscle group too.  My diet had a couple of misteps, but again, not anywhere near the "old days."  Another thing that I am back on track with today.  Sooo I think I will just update in about a week and hopefully I will be down a few pounds by then too. 

Motivation?  I don’t know.  The past few days, I just feel I have LOST it.  Something.  I feel not so bound and determined as I have the past couple of months.  I have had a super hard time getting up, feel exhausted ALL the time, and last night I felt super sick to my stomach.  I feel like I just want to sleep all the time.  My house is a mess.  I haven’t gained any weight in the past several days, but as far as I know, haven’t lost any either.  I have been going to bed ridiculously early and still don’t feel rested.  I just feel like it is making me miss out on alone time with my husband.

I’m staring at the treadmill right now, not running on it.  I just need to get my whiney A in gear and snap out of it.  I am pretty sure this all started on Monday night, because the baby woke up at 3:30 in the morning, and my alarm was set for 4:45 to go to the gym Tuesday morning.  So I got up at 3:30 am and had to stay up, had a long day, and I feel like I have never recovered.  I need a kick in the butt because I don’t want my progress to stall out.  Well…

Anyone else have days like this?

Well I am excited to write this blog.  It has been 47 days now since I started whipping myself into shape, so just a little under 7 weeks.  I officially lost 15 pounds total this week, and I am REALLY starting to notice with my clothes.  I have switched into a whole new size, and people are really noticing.  I will also go out on a limb and say I believe I have gained some muscle weight in this time too, so I would bet that I have actually probably lost more than 15 pounds pure fat.  Personally, I can really see a difference in my progress pics and it makes it so exciting.  Today, my first cheat meal.  2 pieces of pizza.  EH, it was ok.  But now I am more than ever excited again to see what I can do this week.  The plan: all my extra cardio, 100% super clean eating, and go tanning a few times and see how much better I can make this next weekend’s progress pics look   I am REALLY hoping to bust into the 160’s this week and I am SO CLOSE!

So today begins my revamped fitness and diet regimen.  It’s safe to say it is more intense than the last 6 weeks have been.  I have AM and PM cardio and a different food plan so I am excited to see what the next few weeks bring.  I am hoping over the next 6 weeks to lose more weight than I did over the first 6 weeks.  I am hoping to lose at LEAST 15 more pounds in this time.  I have a mini goal for 9 1/2 weeks from now because it is my sister in law’s wedding, aka the first time of the year I am likely to get dressed up for anything.  By that time, I am hoping to have lost 20 (more) pounds by then.  But then, weight is only an arbitrary number really, so I am more excited to actually SEE the progress I am making when it comes time.  I am already feeling great, so, I am just… excited over all.  Excited to keep pushing each and every day towards my goals.  And really doing it.

Last night I went out for chinese… my parents took out my whole family.  So, I went off menu as far as off of my diet menu.  I had chicken with broccoli and a ton of green beans on the side.  I somehow bypassed the crabmeat rangoons and fried rice… thank God.  But I still felt a little disappointed in myself.  I’m not going to pretend that my dish wasn’t all sauced and most likely MSG filled.  Still, progress not perfection, right?  If that was the worst of my diet sins in the past 6 weeks, I’m not doing so bad.

Killlla workout today.  I am able to run more and more every week, less and less walking.  Also, I had my chest workout today, and I pretty much rocked it.  Now I am eating and then we’re going on a bike ride.  It’s ike 40 degrees but it might as well be 80 compared to the weather we’ve BEEN having… can’t wait to get outside.

I have had the greatest week, fit-wise.  First of all, I lost 3 pounds, which I believe is the most I have lost in a week since I started out.  I am now officially down 11 pounds over the past 32 days and I feel so good.  I am confident that it’s probably 11 pounds straight fat, and probably then some.  I have been lifting heavy, getting sore after every workout.  Which is NOT what I have ever done in the past.  I still have been sticking to 30-35 minutes of cardio 5x per week, and I have been pushing myself in the weightroom. 

ALSO- I did get a new gym membership, and I was in today and yesterday.  It’s fun to be in a new environment with such high quality equipment.  I can’t wait to meet some people.  Although, most everyone I have seen (women especially) have stuck to the cardio stuff.  Like I said, I have only been in 2 times. 

I am existing on whey, chicken, tuna, assorted carbs, and nuts.  I can only recall one day where I considered it to be pretty tough, and hey, you get through it.  I am getting more and more excited to work out every day.  I am excited to go tomorrrow…!  I can really see the results and that makes it even better.

Mmmkay… I’m gonna go…