Thoughts, Ideas, and quick stabs

Ok, I’m not sure if it’s me, or if the entire freaking world has gone insane, but lately it seems that driving in this town has gone out of control. Starts with 2 days ago. I dropped my daughter off at her school, and it’s right in the middle of a very busy part of town. I take a right out of the parking lot, and pull up to a stop light. Waiting to take a right turn, I see that the opposite traffic has a green arrow, and are all making left turns. Most of them are coming all the way over into the right hand lane, because they need to turn into the parking lot of the school. So I’m waiting, there really isn’t any where to go. It can’t be more than 5 seconds, and the guy behind me starts laying on his horn. I look in my mirror, and throw my hand up. Where in the hell does he think I can go, and are you in that big of a f’n hurry you can’t wait 10 seconds? He proceeds to throw his hand up at me. So patiently I wait for him to pull along side of me as we are going down the road. I roll my window down, and he does the same. So I causally ask him "Do you really want your a$$ kicked this early in the morning?" - I think I f*cked up his day, because he had nothing to say and just drove off.

 Then, yesterday coming home from picking up my youngest, there seems to be an accident on the freeway. I’m in a lane, that has to merge over, (no choice, it merges anyway). I notice that most of the people in front of me are doing the alternate method, a car in my lane merges in, and the car in the left lane goes, etc. Well, I’m getting the point where I need to merge over, I have my blinker on, and I notice that the car to my left is hugging the bumper of the car in front of her. She is bound and determined to NOT let me in. Well lady, I have bad news for you. I’m coming over, just like the rest of the "normal" folks are doing. So I slowly start pulling over, inch by inch. And damn, she is not budging. I’m thinking, ok this is not going to be pretty, but I can tell you right now, I AM COMING OVER. Finally she realizes that I wasn’t giving in, and backs off, but decides to lay on her horn. Not just a normal horn blast, but 30 f*cking seconds of it. I’m laughing pretty good at this point, because I’m thinking. "you know, just a bit of niceness, and wanting to do the right thing by letting me in, and you wouldn’t have pissed yourself off so much and ruined your day". Think about it, is that what you would have done if it were your mom wanting to merge in? Probably not, so why not take 2 freaking seconds out of your day, and let someone over. GEEZ, gotta love the idiots in the world

Ok, so this does not look like it’s going to be a fun day. Starts out, I take my pre-workout supps, and I’m amped up and ready to go. Get to the gym, only to find out the freaking electricity is out AGAIN. I say again, because it happens every other month or so. So here I am all cranked up, and no where to go.

So I stop by the auto parts store, and gonna grab some new wiper blades. Do you need a phuckin’ PHD to put these damn things on. Maybe it’s because I can’t see straight, but I can’t figure this sh!t out to save my life. So, what do I do? I resort to redneck logic, and break dem bastards off. Got that sh!t fixed. There’s an old saying down here in the south. "There isn’t much a hammer and some duct tape can’t fix"

Ok, don’t get me wrong, I love the idea of women working out, changing their bodies and developing muscle. I’m all for that. But, there are certain aspects of women’s body building that just puzzle the f*ck out of me.

 First, who thought of all these poses? Some of them make the woman look like she has a coat hanger stuck in her back. It can’t be comfortable, and to me is not a nice way to show off the hard work she has been putting in.

 Next comes the tanning. Geez, do you not think we are going a BIT overboard here? The women look more like Oompa Loompa’s then they do tanned, well conditioned bodies. I understand needing some color, but damn!

 Last, girls, please. Some of ya’ll need to look at your suits. The way they are pulled up in the crotch, and no body fat, makes it look like some of ya’ll have been shot in the crotch with a shotgun style pellet gun. Does it really have to be like that to show off your hard work?

 Ok, I’m off my box

Wow, it’s been a while since I’ve written anything. Mostly because I think people are going to do what they want to do, regardless of what someone else says. But, I’ve been thinking a lot lately, so here goes….

Why is it, in this country especially, everyone is in a HURRY up mode? Often, sitting in traffic, I watch people get all frustrated and do some really stupid things. Running through the yellow light, when they could have easily stopped. Have you ever noticed that when you stop, and the person next to you goes through, that very often you catch up to them at the very next light? But, wow they couldn’t stop and be safe, or allow the other traffic to go. Or how people can’t allow the person behind them in line at the store to go in front of them, when they have only a couple items? I watched a lady today, freaking out, as she stood in line at Target today. She was jumping all over the place trying to get checked out. But it only took about 5 minutes for the entire line to get through, but you would have thought it took an eternity. Or how the lady behind me was totally shocked when I asked her if she would like to go first. She had 2 items, and I had a basket of stuff.

What is it with this country, that we can’t take 2 extra minutes to hold the door for someone? Or allow someone to go in front of us? Why is it that we feel that 10 seconds is a lifetime? I remember working in the restaurant business when I was younger, and every time you heard a complaint on how long some waited, it was often 3 times longer than the actual time they waited. Ten minutes was always told as 30. Never without fail. Have you ever seen people get all agitated with an older person driving? What’s the rush? They are nervous and don’t trust their self any more, but we can’t wait and be patient. Saying to our self or even out loud “If you can’t drive, then get off the road”. How sad is that? Being old, and now the generation you spent your life raising, is now telling you to go away.

Which brings me to my biggest question. People are in a huge rush to get the weight off. I mean such a rush, they are willing to take countless DIET pills to get 30 lbs off in a month. Spending unbelievable amounts of money to loose weight. But never thinking, it didn’t take them 30 days to gain 50 lbs, so why on earth do they think it will come off in 30 days. People, if you are fat, realize you are going to have to put in countless hours of WORK to get the weight off. There is no magic pill that is going to do the work for you. It will take time and effort. It is going to take a change in lifestyle to get off what you have put on by being lazy and carefree. Get a good plan in place, a good diet and change you life. Do not think that by paying $300 for a program, that you are going to lose the weight. It is still going to take time, and effort.

Oh, and hold the door for someone today. Allow someone to go first when you can. And be nice to the old people (hopefully one day we all will be old too)

It’s not often that I want to spend the time to write about a subject, but every now and then, something or SOMEONE will strike a nerve with me. The main reason for me to write this blog entry is to say to everyone that may read this, “be careful of the advice you take on this or any website”. (or anywhere in that manner). People will claim to be experts with workout routines, diets, cardio, etc; but what I have found in all the years that I have been working out is – EVERYONE is different. There is no clear cut diet, nor routine that will ever get everyone to the same place.

 
First, we all have different body types. What works for me, may or may not work for you. Example, I was asked this morning, if it was ok to work out a muscle twice a week. A lot has been written in the past few years on this subject, and you can find arguments for both sides. Some people believe that working out the muscle once a week is enough, some believe in more. Me, I find that once a week is no where near enough for my body type. I tend t recover quickly from workouts and have found that working a muscle twice a week seems to have better results for me. But some people have great results with once  a week

 
Second, people have different goals for themselves. I myself am into working on my strength, so I sacrifice the time on cardio for the time with the heavy weights. So what routine might fit your goals, may not fit for me. The workouts my son goes through are so different than mine, because he is working for a specific sport and not working out to increase body size, etc.

 
Lastly, we have the diet. The biggest thing here (and again back to goals) is that not everyone is trying to cut weight, some people are trying to add size, some are trying to just transform, and some are trying wanting to add lean muscle. Also, some people do well with low carb diets, some do well with no sugar diets, some do well with high protein diets. Myself, I cannot cut carbs at all. If I do, everyone might want to back the F up. Understanding how changing your food intake effects YOUR body is a huge step in getting your nutritional plans in order.

 
I guess what I’m trying to say is, when seeking out help and advice, be careful of who or what you take that advice from. There is no set program, diet, or plan that works for all people. If you are paying for a trainer, PLEASE make sure your trainer sits and talks to you. Asks you questions, and listens to you. Is constantly adjusting to you (within reason). Example, one of my favorite people to work with, came to me and asked me to help because the plan she was given just didn’t work for her. WHY? Because it was a plan that had her doing 50 reps of a certain exercise and she said that she just dreaded it so much, that she would avoid going to the gym. So, we (yes the two of us) found a routine that she liked and would enjoy doing. There is nothing wrong with paying for a trainer, some people need the help of others, but also realize this, watch out how much you are paying. I have seen some trainers on this site that have great results and charge what I consider a reasonable price (Stevep78 is one that I have a lot of respect for), and then there are some that are charging outrageous prices for nothing more than a written down plan that they recycle over and over. The person giving you advice has got to know you, adjust to you, and listen to you. I was told the other day that one person I am working with is taking in way too much protein. This person gave this advice without ever asking a single question as to her goals and needs. And then tried to challenge my knowledge by quoting ONE source on the subject. Well hell, I can quote 100 sources that say otherwise. The bottom line is this, first understand that persons goals, and then talk to them about how things are going. Blanket statements are useless, as are blanket routines.

 
Good luck people, BodySpace is a great place to be, but please beware that not everyone here is out for your best interests nor do they really know what they are doing. So choose wisely on who and what you listen to.

It’s funny, day after day a friend of mine and I read through the blogs on this site, and read where people are getting frustrated with the results (or lack thereof) they are getting from their workouts. And every day I go to the gym, and watch people do these workout routines, and then question why they aren’t getting anywhere. So I thought I would stop and write down some basic rules to help out here.

First, don’t expect….

To see any major weight loss if all you do is go to the gym, walk on the treadmill for 30 minutes while reading a book

To see any major transformation of your body , if all you do is cardio

To build any muscle, if all you do is lift small weights day after day (you have to stress the muscles to get muscles)

To see any major muscle development if you have done the same routine for the past year. (Your muscles require change, part of the stressing thing)

To have a ripped up body, if you bust your ass in the gym only to go home and eat like shit. (a ripped body requires cardio, stress of the muscles, and the proper diet)

To see a total body transformation in a couple weeks. It takes time, hell you didn’t get fat overnight, so you aren’t going to get ripped in that timeframe. Changes take time, weight loss takes time.

And most of all, don’t expect a damn thing if you are going to come up with excuses after excuses of why you didn’t get your workouts in. Ladies, you all have a monthly cycle, get use to it and stop complaining about it. It’s a fact of life, (mind you not a fun one) and all women go through it. Guys and girls, everyone gets a cold, work through the damn things. If you are going to let the sniffles shut you down, you might as well give up 3 months a year of working out. If your job stresses you out, get your ass up and go to the gym before hand. I worked out at 5 am for 5 years straight, because that was the only time I could get to the gym, so I don’t want to hear and damn thing about that. If you want results, then you have to be determined to get them, and not let a damn thing in your way. You have to love the workouts.

If something isn’t working, change it up. If you hate something, change until you find something you do love. If you don’t know the answers, then ask. There are so many people on this site that are serious (and not here to show off their ass) that are more than willing to help. There should be no excuses for you to not have the all the information to reach your goals

Body Statistics

One human hair can support 3 kg (6 lb).
The average man’s penis is three times the length of his thumb.
Human thighbones are stronger than concrete.
A woman’s heart beats faster than a man’s.
There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.
Women blink twice as often as men.
The average person’s skin weighs twice as much as the brain.
Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.
If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.

Women reading this will be finished now.
Men who read this are probably still busy checking their thumbs

Ok, today is a day to remember and to let you into more of my world of the gym. When I first walked in, I knew this was going to be an interesting day. As I got to the bottom of the stairs, there stood “Cell Phone Sally”, and I had to take a double look. I think she must have forgotten what day it was, because I think she still had on her Pooh Bear costume, left over from Halloween. I thought, damn and had to really take a good look. Here she is, in spandex type leggings that showed more panty line in the front than they did in the back. Maybe that’s because she has more out front than in the back, who knows. And a tight fitting tank top, that didn’t come all the way down to cover her Pooh belly. It was just hanging out there. Oh my goodness, good thing I had already eaten.

So I was sitting there working out, and thinking this day couldn’t get any worse, when BAM, it hit me. The Haute Mama’s Spin class had been canceled. So here we are with 15 women not know what the F*CK to do. So they all come out, complaining and yacking. It sounded like a chicken yard when the coyotes go in there. Bawk, bawk bawk. Damn, it was bad, but I was getting a kick out of it. Well, some how they all decided to get on the cardio equipment. Most on the treadmills. One lady (who sounds like a mixture of Demi Moore and Donald Duck) got on one of the treadmills. And apparently it wasn’t working, but damn she was determined to make it work, and stood there pressing buttons and bitching for about 15 minutes. Then got on the one right next to it, and I guess that one didn’t work either, but was determined to make this one work. Standing there for 10 more minutes pressing every button on that machine as well. Finally, deciding it wasn’t’ going to work, she jumped back to the first machine she was one, and started pressing buttons again, 5 minutes, then back to the 2^nd one for 5 more minutes. This went on and on, jumping back and forth from one to the other. (ok, now mind you, there were 3 other TM that weren’t being used.). So after at least 30 minutes, she decided to try one of the others. WOW, it worked, and off she went. Sometimes I want to slap people and tell them the definition of insanity, but I’m not sure they would get it.

Well, at least I had an interesting start to my day.

Guts or Balls…

I hope this clears up any confusion on the definitions. Medically
speaking, there is no difference in the outcome, since both ultimately
result in death…

Ok, back on my soap box for a minute. Some people are just so stupid, and it is really starting to get sad. For a while there, a good friend of mine and I would just kill time laughing at some of the people on this board, but tonight she sent me a picture and it was the last straw. I just have to give everyone notice, I will now start calling you on your ignorance. Not that I’m anything to brag about, but come on. Let me give you a few examples.

* The mess in some of these people’s houses. One lady posted a picture of what looked like was suppose to be a picture of her calves, but I couldn’t get past the mess on the floor. It was/is literally covered with black feathers. Looks like two teams of black birds got loose in the house and decided to play the Super Bowl in there

* Mirrors - has anyone ever heard of cleaning a mirror BEFORE you use it to take a picture of yourself. Damn, ya’ll have so much toothpaste on the mirrors, I can’t believe you ever get any in your mouth.

* Clothes - MY GOODNESS, pick up people. Damn, NUFF SAID

* Pictures - today I saw a picture of an girl, (she was probably attractive), but I couldn’t get past her pose. She was obviously trying to be sexy but her GUT was hanging out. Come on people, take a look. Can you not see fat on your own bodies. Or one girl who posts nothing but pictures of her clevage because she is embarrassed to post anything else. OK, well don’t post anything at all then.

* AND GUYS - geez some of you guys are so pitiful. If a girl posts a picture, no matter what, you rate them a 10, and say how sexy they look. Are you that F’n hard up? Or are you just blind, and your keyboard has brail letters on it? I’m cool with the ol’ grandma saying of not saying anything if you can’t say something nice. But Grandma wasn’t blind, and would never tell you to lie.

* BLOGS - damn people who the F cares what you ate for breakfast? It’s fine if it’s part of a whole blog, or at the bottom like a foot note, but geez every day 100 people write "I had oatmeal and egg whites". Someone be like ShanBl and make my day by writing something interesting or funny. BUT please, don’t be the BLOG SLUT and tell the world how much you like to have sex. I don’t care, and except of the guys that will F a tree if they thought there was a bee hive in it, no one else does either.

 Ok, the old dinosaur is crawling back into his cave.