Never Settle For Less

When I was in high school I did some really stupid things.  At some point during those 4 years I

• Got caught with “unauthorized” females in the house
• Smoke black and milds
• Fought in a weight room full of metal plates and sharp objects (smooth move)
• Chased a school bus 1/4 mile down the street

While all of those things are silly or ridiculous in their own right none of them can come close to my biggest blunder.  At my school shoes and clothes were a status symbol.  If you had the most expensive or exclusive clothes you were seen as coherent and people assumed you could probably spell your name right.  Since I wanted to hold some kind of status I eventually became a sneaker freak.  I was all over just about every new pair of high priced sneakers that hit the market.

Every year the genius squad at Nike would pump out a new pair of must have sneakers (Air Jordans, Air Max, etc).  When I started buying shoes the price tag was only $140. The most expensive pair a bought was $200.  Even though I should have cared, price was no object for me.  I had a job flipping pizzas and nothing else to do with the money. So I did the next best thing…flush it down the toilet.

Things really got out of hand during my senior year.  Cue the almighty air max 95.

One of the executive sales and marketing geniuses at Nike decided to go through their catalog and re-release the all black Air-Max 95 shoe.  It was a pure stroke of genius.  It seemed like EVERYBODY under the age of 30 wanted those shoes.  As soon as they hit the shelf they were gone.  If you weren’t at the store when they were released you could forget about it.  Unfortunately for me my grandmother didn’t see the urgency so I couldn’t get a pair.

At first I didn’t think much of it. After all it was just a pair of shoes.  How big of a deal could it really be?  I found out when I came back to school.  All the cool kids were rocking a pair and I wasn’t. In my little mind that made it a big deal.Since I’m not the type to go down without a fight I launched an FBI style manhunt for the shoes.  I think the FBI has a 98% success rate.  Mine was 0.  Every store I went to was fresh out of size 12 all black Air-Max 95 sneakers.  I was becoming obsessed and depressed at the same time.  All over a pair of shoes.  They were the talk of the town and I was left out.

One day my luck changed.  I walked into Hibbett sports on the hunt.  I asked the salesperson for the size 12 all black Air-Max 95.  She went to the back of the store and returned with a box in her hand. A surge of happiness shot through my body as she approached.  As she got closer that happiness turned to bewilderment.

What’s this??  The size on the box said 14 not when I had requested a 12.  She explained to me that the only size they had was a 14.  Up until then I had been very level headed and rational about my hunt.  Things were about to change. This was the very first time that I’d had a pair within arms reach.

I slipped them on and “walked” around in them.  They were definitely too big. I had room for another adult in there but it really didn’t matter.  I had finally had my shoes within reach!  All rational thought was thrown out of the window as I began to daydream about my new shoes.

“Are you going to buy them?” the sale person broke through my daydream trying to make her sale.  “Ummm…sure I’ll take them.”  I was beaming with joy and pride as I walked to the sales counter.  That was the first and only time in my life that I paid $145 for something that obviously didn’t fit me.

The next day I woke up and prepared for school. My euphoria was broken up by a dose of reality.  I was too caught up in being cool to realize that the shoes were indeed 2 sizes too big.  When I walked tt sounded like my shoes were farting.  I had to fix this and fix it quick.  I took an entire roll of toilet tissue, separated it in half, stuffed it into my shoes, and hit the door for school.

About halfway through the day I noticed that the foot fart had returned.   I looked down to see toilet tissue coming out of my shoes.

GREAT!!  I hustled to the restroom to remove the tissue and create another plan of attack.  Unfortunately, there was nothing I could do accept suck it.  For the rest of the day my shoes flopped around like I had on flip flops.  Actually I did have on flip flops.  They were flip flops disguised as $140 sneakers that happened to be 2 sizes too big .

For a month or two I tried to find ways to make my shoes fit.  Every attempt to look cool only served to make me look silly.  I realized things had gotten out of hand when my cousin asked me when I stole Shaq’s shoes from. After two months of making myself look like a clown I packed the shoes up never to appear again.

Conclusion
I tell this story because its humorous and it packs a powerful point.  I realize today (and I probably did then) that buying $140 shoes that didn’t fit me wasn’t in my best interest.  At the time I was caught up in an emotional storm were fitting in was the only thing that mattered.  I felt so much pressure to fit in that I was willing to do something totally foolish with my time and my money to make it happen.  Ultimately all I did was make myself look like a complete, 100% _______________ (insert your favorite synonym for idiot).

If you’re not careful the same thing will happen to you as an adult. Society has the power to place a tremendous social strain on anyone not strong enough to resist.   I’ve seen some awesome people make some terrible decisions because they want to fit in with the crowd or be “successful”.

Look at the sub-prime mortgage crisis of 2007 and 2008.  Everyone (even the financially unfit) felt the need to buy a home to start building towards the highly subjective “American dream”.  See how great that turned out?  I could go on and on with examples but the picture is already crystal clear.

Analyze your life and start living with your best interest in mind.  Don’t go into the grave living the lift of a person being pushed around and pressured by society.  After all Peer Pressure is 4 da Kidz!

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Very few words twist me up or get my blood boiling like the word "normal".  I always have been and always will be annoyed by the idea that being "normal" is the most desirable way to live life.  Don’t get me wrong.  I understand that you must wear shoes in public places, eat food with utensils, and hold the door for the fairer sex.  Honestly, that’s where my list of "normal" behavior ends.

My propensity for abnormal behavior has led me to some crazy places.  I have wild scarring on my arms and legs, I love public speaking, I constantly challenge things I don’t agree with, act like a white person (whatever that means), and I’ve changed my life by dropping 50 of the most disgusting pounds I’ve ever carried.  All of these things are fun and rewarding for me but they aren’t considered "normal" by any stretch.
From what I’ve seen the people who avoid being "normal" are the ones who enjoy their lives the most.  They may not be the richest (in a surprising number of cases they are pretty well off), they may not have the best bodies, and they may not have the most complex words in their vocabularies.  However, they are enjoying their lives 100 times more than the "normal" people who just go around fogging up mirrors.
I could probably list 99 reasons why being "normal" sucks but I’ll keep it to 3.

1 - “Normal” People blend right in with the crowd

Have you ever noticed how most people seem to be carbon copies of somebody else.  That’s a weird trend if I’ve ever seen one.  If I run into one more person who is an up and coming, enterprising, detail-oriented, data driven,  business minded, self-starting (fill in the blank based on career) I may and hold a pillow over my nose.  Here’s a news flash.  Not everybody is detail-oriented and data driven.  If they were 70% of the people on this great planet wouldn’t be complaining about job dissatisfaction.

Sometimes I think we were all made at a people printing plant.  I challenge anyone to disprove my theory.

2 - “Normal” People are not Memorable

People have an overwhelming tendency to ask what you do for a living when they meet you.  For the longest time I’d blurt out a short description of what I actually do between 9-5 on a daily basis.  I’d give my pre-prepared spiel on how I ran reports, provided ad-hoc analysis, and brought dollars back to the bottom line as a logistics analyst.  95% of the people I met couldn’t remember that 4 weeks later.

About six months ago that answer morphed into something totally different.  To amuse myself I shortened that answer down to one word…nothing.  I know exactly what you’re saying.

Why would you tell people that you do nothing?  The answer is simple.

It’s probably the most memorable answer you can give to that question.  It’s only done for shock value.

Usually I’ll come back to the person 4-5 minutes later and explain to them what I actually do. So far nobody has forgotten that!
It’s memorable and it allows me to position myself as someone who’s comfortable, confident, and MEMORABLE.  How many “normal” people can you remember a month after you’ve met them?

Exactly.

3 - “Normal” People Never Challenge Themselves

In order to be normal you must truly aspire to astrological levels of “normal” activity.  “Normal” people just  aren’t comfortable pushing their boundaries.
Go ahead and challenge yourself.  Beware, people may look at you like an alien.  Get ready for questions like:

How dare you take a risk?

How dare you enter a contest that you may lose?

How dare you stand up for yourself?

How dare you lose weight?

How dare you gain muscle?

How dare you congregate with and meet people that are “out of your league”?

How dare you set a goal and do everything within your power to achieve it?

Just who do you think you are?

What’s gotten into you?

Are you ok?

The list could go on and on for days so here’s the point.  Stretching yourself outside of your normal comfort zone is the only way to grow and break the “normal” mold.  Whether its finding an instrument to play, meeting people of a higher pay grade, or taking a risk to measure yourself against the competition.  It’s all a part of breaking that “normal” mold and figuring out what works for you.

Conclusion
As I said earlier being normal requires that you be just that…normal.  Nothing is inherently wrong with it.  It just requires you to be a robot that walks, talks, stands, sits, coughs, dances, smiles, cries, and wears the exact same clothes as everyone else.  Go ahead and rip that bar code off your neck and discover yourself.

Here’s a piece of advice: stick out like a sore thumb, do something memorable (big or small), and challenge yourself. Trust me, its the only way you’re going to get anywhere.
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Have you ever felt like the weight of the world on your shoulders?

Have you ever felt like there was so much going on and you couldn’t handle it?

Have you ever just needed to be able to clear your mind and start with a clean slate?

If you’ve answered yes to any of these questions then this article is for you.  Sit back, relax, and enjoy my 5 Powerful Methods to Clear Your Mind.

1 - Take some Time for Yourself

The majority of your time is spent with other people.  That can be both good and bad.  On the positive side you experience feelings of companionship, belonging, and teamwork most of your waking hours.  These are all great feelings and we need to have them to regulate our lives.

However, there are some dark spots in that cloud.  Belonging to a group whether it be coworkers, family, or other social groups require a great degree of conformity.  After all you wouldn’t belong to that group if you weren’t similar in some way.  Becoming too entrenched in a group can ultimately lead to losing your own sense of individuality.

Take some time for yourself to combat this loss of identity.  Being alone allows you to get in touch with the person that you really are.  A powerful way to clear your mind while you’re alone is to talk to yourself.  That’s right, I said it, have a good solid conversation with yourself.  While it sounds crazy its really nothing more than thinking out loud.  You’ll be surprised at how much you can express when its just you and…you.

2 - Put Situations in Perspective

Blowing things out of proportion is an extremely easy thing to do.  Mix in some high emotions and you never know what you’ll get.  Sadness or anger can quickly take a situation from a level 1 to a level 10.  Try to avoid making a mountain out of a molehill.  People will rarely climb to the top to see what the issue is.

Step back and take a fact based look at your life. Looking at things from a factual basis is a hard yet effective tactic.  Things like your  long term financial situation, health, fitness, and your overall sense of happiness warrant a good bit of your attention.  These things effect you on a day to day basis.

Getting your lunch stolen at work (I’ve had this happen before), the rumor going around about you wearing white after labor day, or that annoying juice stain on your carpet are collectively worth 3 minutes of your time.  Treat them like so and keep the train moving.
Focus your time and energy on those things that matter.  Treat the little things like little things.

3 - Be Creative

Creative outlets are some of the best stress busters known to mankind.  When you do something creative you can get lost in what you’re doing and just let some time pass.  Some of the creative things I do are:

• Write Poetry
• Write Blogs or Articles
• Take relaxing drives and look for alternate routes around the city
• Make workout plans for myself and others
• Make up “remixes” to popular songs to give myself a good laugh

That’s just a small list of possible things to do.  Explore your creative side to help reduce stress.

4 - Call an elderly person and have a talk

Older people are a wealth of experience and knowledge.  There is something about the wisdom of an older person that has a calming effect on you.  Most older people have either lived the experiences you are going through or know someone who has.  I’ve literally had conversations with an older relative where I felt like he or she was reading my mind.   Find a good elderly person to lean on.  They can shave years off your learning curve.

5 - Allow yourself to get angry, upset, or bothered.  You can’t sterilize yourself too much

We live in a sterilized world where you “can’t say this” or “shouldn’t say that” for fear of hurting someone’s feelings.  As a result its easy to let the mind get cluttered and confused.

Living a sterilized life and never expressing any emotions just isn’t human.  You don’t have to break glass and throw people out of windows but you need to let some things out every now and then.  Express control while allowing yourself to experience emotions such as:

• Aggression
• Anger
• Disgust
• Pleasure
• Pride
• Sadness
• Euphoria

Handling these emotions make you a better human being.  You’re not a robot so don’t act like one.  Sometimes you need to tell someone they are getting on your nerves.  It may shock and appall but it also helps with cutting loose of stress and clearing up the clutter.  Learn to express yourself, deal with the emotions, and move on.

Conclusion

Many of us are stressed out with cluttered minds.  Use the following 5 tips to ensure that you never go to sleep with a cluttered mind:

1. Take some time to yourself
2. Put situations in perspective
3. Be Creative
4. Call upon an elderly person and talk
5. Allow yourself to experience all emotions

If you like this blog please bookmark this page or RSS subscribe.  To RSS subscribe scroll to the bottom of the page, click on “entries RSS”, and select the page you’d prefer.  Forward the page link to 4 or 5 people who you think may benefit from the information presented here.  Thanks for reading and have a great day!