TLC: Trust, Love, Consistency

However, if you plan on making a whole week’s omelette’s and you’ve locked your keys in the car, had only 5hrs sleep and bruised up both your shins until they’re purple where in the heck do you go from there!?

Well, you discover that you wouldn’t make a very good car thief but that a change of plans doesn’t mean a change of attitude.

I didn’t get to bed until after 2.30am last night. Not because I’m a wild party animal, I was trying to finish testing a web design in Internet Explorer 6. Cripes! My body still woke up just a little later than the usual time and my brain had dreampt up a mean and nasty plan of a not-cardio workout that it thought might be fun. I couldn’t go back to sleep so I got up made a lazy breaky, still hungry so an hr later I gave into the "i’m sleep deprived feed me carbs" siren and had a small serve of buckwheat and some rice protien. YAY! no sniffles! No probs I’ll pick up my tray of eggs and vegies and head straight to the super-gym, then back to bed for a nap before cook-off. Green bags; check. Phone; check. Shopping list; check….. erm where’s my handbag, Kev? No, Kev they’re my shoes. Maybe Stephen didn’t spot it last night when I asked him to bring my stuff in….. doh! Handbag in the car, Stephen 40km away on a day long motorbike ride.

Just that second the train the markets goes past. So that’s out too! Change of plans, grab the cobweb riddled pushie, spare key and petty cash. Intentionally don’t brush off cobwebs as I’ve got no way to lock up my bike when I get there so it better look like a wreck. Round the markets in record time. $8 for 30 free range eggs, why would I buy anything else! On the train with my bike and goodies and back home only 1 hour behind schedule. Feeling: relaxed and thankful for the change of pace. Not yet sleepy. Time for round 2.

Watch videos on YouTube on how to break into cars, but I’m no good. Toss up between the tiny gym and the non-airconed gym and choose tiny. 35mins bus ride later (a 12min drive) I’m wondering what my strange idea of fun is. Loaded up a bench with 3×20kg plates and push there and back the length of hte tiny gym. Straight into farmers walks, walking lunges and sprint there and back. Repeat x 5. Urgh maybe some db swings, snatches and abs as a finisher. In and out in 25mins. Another 30 min bus ride back. Get off early at the butchers for meat. Glutes struggle and complain all the walk back but I my mind just can’t be brought down. Even when it starts raining I feel peaceful.

Treat myself to a nice bath with my new Lush porridge soap. Yum!

Not everyday is this upbeat for me but lately I’ve been finding so much more peace in the everyday. It’s been great. It brings me such hope and confidence for later in the year when I’m prepping for comps. Once upon a time I would have curled up in a ball and cried and yelled at the dog for the day.

It’s days like today which remind me why I love being strong.
Had to help the boss shift couches and a board room table out of the office and new ones in. The boss is a former state level football player, mean footy coach … and great guy. Our office is on the first floor of some very steep stairs. I had 3 offers from people in the street to carry my end of the furniture, poor boss didn’t get any. This is the kinda thing I would never have been able to do a few years ago. I didn’t even raise a sweat (though I did change from heels to sneakers). I felt a bit sorry for him as I think he was a little embarrassed.

Food was spot on today. Got an awesome walk in the National park as the sun rose and did extended drop sets for shoulder in the sauna gym. Also knocked off a major project at work.

I love my life

Everyone seems to have a bit of Pauline on their blog at the moment.
She’s a truly inspiring lady. I just read this post and it ties into a lot of stuff I’ve been thinking about and working on of late.

Check it out:

Imagine waking up and first thing you do you smile. You smile because you’re grateful to start a new day and make it worth remembering. No dark thoughts, no worries, your mind is clear, nothing is there to put you down. On the street you see all these people who smile back when you smile. It’s amazing… No task is too tough, no burden is to heavy, no problem too big, you’re at ease, enjoying the very moment. And even though the world around you struggles, you are taking one step at a time, set on making it. Today, tomorrow and the day after that.

This is how I feel. I am in charge of the movie of my life. I’m the director, the d.o.p, I write the dialogues and I am the leading lady. I’m excited about not knowing the end, I’m excited about feeling and sensing what is to come. I trust my intuition, I know what is right, I know what I’m supposed to do.

When someone tries to push me down, I see beyond it. You cannot beat someone who does not compete!

I believe all has a meaning, I get hit and I try to see it was for the better. Or that I needed to learn a lesson. All happens for a reason. Good and bad. Isn’t it amazing how we all get stronger from being weak sometimes.

I am so grateful, so happy I always choose to follow my heart and go for my dreams. So far so good! There is no impossibilites, just incapabilites of going for what you want. Nobody can stop you if you believe in your success and happiness.

When the days are gone, all I want is a feeling of being thankful and happy. And I want to share those feelings with those who share that desire. So, I will keep on having my heart on public display. I love my life.

I’ve been working on kicking my own butt back into gear and decided that it was time for new desktop wallpapers. Rae and Tank are gone (sorry ladies)

These are images my lovely sister took of me the day before my the state titles last year. I love them so much. They are going to keep me motivated to be even better this September.

Nutrition and exercise can be confusing subjects, so when you first get started, the
initial challenge is that you don’t know what to do. …… However, gaining
knowledge is only half the battle.   The far greater challenge for most people is applying
that knowledge and taking action. There is a big difference between knowing what to do
and doing what you know.  Goals are the bridges that span this gap.

I’m just reading through Burn the fat, feed the muscle and the above quote just jumped out at me.

Hi All,
It’s been ages since I’ve blogged. I’ve been hiding/ burying my head in the sand a bit. Time to come up and face the music though. (An ugly mix of metaphores if ever there was one!).

Just like everyone in the universe Christmas was full of temptation and I thoroughly enjoyed myself (and my dads macadamia and sultana turkey stuffing). Food that doesn’t do good things for me was eaten and I’m seeing numbers on my scales I’d rather not. Hence the hiding from the world. It’s probably not as drastic as it appears as my shoulders, chest, arms and back are showing some serious signs of improvement.

Rather than getting down on myself I thought it was about time to do some thinking and planning. I know everyone else did this week’s ago but I’ve been churning a few things through my skull still and didn’t feel ready for new year’s resolutions. Sometime last year I drew up a single sheet of A4 paper with priorities, goals (short, mid and longterm) and actions and nailed every single one of the 1 year goals. I’ve never been a goal setter before but it worked. This year I tackled things a bit differently and started with the 3 trates/values I want to prioritise in my life. The top corner of my page has:
T rust
L ove
C consistency

To move forward and reach my goals these 3 things are going to be crucial.

I then divided the page into thirds and left the middle blank, and titled it actions. The final column was for this year’s goals. The top one is kind of overarching of the other three.
1. To be at 12% BF while gaining muscle, maintaining a mental, spiritual and physical balance.
2. I will compete in all 3 federation’s (WFF, INBA, WNBF) state titles in September at 8% BF and my best physique ever, allowing me to qualify for national titles.
3. I will maintain a calm and focused mind
4. I will stay in my new job and be a focused and productive team member

I jumped back to my 1st collum and wrote:
I am…
an athlete
an artist
a lover
a friend
a listener
a thinker

To join everything up I was now able to fill in my actions
Relaxation and recovery
Fortnightly massages (I can realisticly afford this financially and time wise)
Weekly Saunas (free at my gym, I just need to prioritise the time)
Daily visualisation or mediation (crucial!!!! I seem to talk myself out of this daily though)
Diet and Exercise
Prioritise vegetables, preferably organic in my diet (protein is 2nd nature to me, but if I don’t eat enough GFV’s I snack)
Follow PN strategies
Listen to and trust my body
Create a strong mind/muscle connection allowing me to train with maximum focus and intensity
Creativity
Make time daily to read, write, draw and nurture my inner artist
Weekly visit a gallery or see a band, movie or play
Lover, listener, thinker, friend
Listen with intent
speak mindfully
love infinitely
share openly

Lots of thinking, but I believe the at with Trust, love and consistency I can combat my fears, doubts and uncertainty and become the person I know I can be.

It’s been 10 days since I last set foot in the gym. There’s nothing I’d like to do more than a good hard weights session, but it’s not an option.
I’ve still got the dregs of my cold/flu and my energy levels are almost non-existent. A visit to the chiro yesterday left me feeling a fair bit better this morning but by lunchtime I knew I couldn’t train again today.
I’m taking each day as it comes. If I’ve got the energy I take Kevin for a walk before work, but even this wipes me out. I’ve been keeping my food clean, lean and green and my weight has stayed consistent even after my 10% meals.

All this inactivity and inability to achieve new goals is leaving me in quite a dark headspace and I’m worried that I’m sleeping too much and am actually making my energy levels worse.

I noticed I’d totally dropped off my water intake so I’m trying to get that back up above 4L again. In addition, there’s lots of glutamine and fish oils with every meal and I’ve got some fancy herbal medicine from the chiro which I’m hoping will help.

I’m open to any suggestions from people as how to get out of this hole. All I want to do is get back in the gym and get on with my life!

I’m all depleted and starting to load. Mmmm the warm fuzzy feeling of carb loading. 2 more sleeps and I’m on stage in Whyalla. Looking at the results from last year, it could be a walk in the park, there was only 1 female competitor last time. I know at least one girl from the SA titles will be there this year. I’d rather a decent competition, but want to get to the nationals just for the experience and to meet the other girls and JD (in person).

My official placing for last weekend was 6th, but then everyone else got 6th too. I was initially very dissapointed with the result but I had such a good time and unleashed the show-pony inside of me that I couldn’t be upset for too long. It was too much fun. I think it’s so awesome that Kim, the promoter, gave little trophies to everyone who competed. I feel so proud everytime I pass mine.

In the last week I’ve concentrated on my posing and trying to get a little leaner (cardio, cardio, cardio). I’m very excited that tonight I’ve finally got a session with Terry Roberts to go over my posing. We’ve been eyeballing each other not sure who each other was all week in the gym so it made for a funny phone call today when she returned my enquiry. She also said that I was looking much better in the gym yesterday than I was on stage (grr), so hopefully, between her and JD’s worrying I can come in a lot better on Saturday.

I am getting more and more excited about off-season training and eating. I don’t mean eating crap. I mean getting some good food in, to get some good size on. I’m still figuring out the best way to set measurable goals for my off-season plan to build massive shoulders (with glutes to match). I’ll be discussing my goals with JD as soon as all this comp malarky is over. I feel so feircely determined to build a better body, must be my stubborn streak.

In the meantime here are my quads (tara inspired):

As in, if you rattled my brain this would be what would fall out:

Last night I went to bed sick of this whole competing process. I hunkered down and said to the boy ‘only 33 more sleeps and it’s over’. I then slept really badly, my last meal not digesting and my brain turning over and over. However, I’d done one really clever thing before I went to bed. I’d left my blinds just slightly open. I awoke at 6.30am and the sun had started to come out. By 6.55 when Kevin let out his wake-up yap at my window there was glorious golden stream of light coming in. I had my supps, drank my tea and made S’s latte, emptied the dishwasher and grabbed the dog and iPod to do cardio. That’s when I realised all my wishes had come true. 3 months ago when I started my am cardio and it was cold and wet I’d wished for the last 30 days to be beautiful spring weather. The last 2 days we’ve had the most glorious walks. Today I walked up into Brownhill Conservation Park and let Kev run off lead for a bit, much to the telling off of the ranger.

I listened to two very fortuitous (is that the word?) podcasts. The first ‘Feeding Motivation‘ by Gill at Zencast which talked about deciding and feeding areas of right effort and was a generally great reminder of mindfulness practice. This was a great way to walk and had me really noticing the how all my body felt (not just the sore bits). I realised I was feeling strong and healthy and thankful for the opportunity to be out and about.

The second podcast I put on was for my home stretch. I chose The Daily Boost from Motivation to Move. The episode (can’t find which one- sorry) spoke all about consistency. How determination can get you started with anything, but it’s the consistency which really gets you achieving. I thought to myself, how true. I’ve consistently showed up for my cardio every morning, consistency in the diet JD has given me has given me great energy and sense of wellbeing,  consistency is what’s going to get me my next job. I can be as determined as I want, but without the consistency to back it up I’m just starting over again everyday.

It was nice to walk in the door after my walk, and instead of feeling behind, just take the time to do 1 thing at a time and take notice of what I was doing. My breakfast was more delicious (zucchini, watercress and mixed herb fritatta), I finally noticed the subtle sweetness in my Oolong tea that the package mentioned and I’d got the same amount done in the same amount of time that it would have taken but felt better about doing it. (GAWD! you’d think I’d remember this for more than 2 days!!!).

Other cool things:
The herb box and pre-prep: Yesterday I went the markets for some fish and other veg supplies and picked up some cheap herbs from the asian herb lady (Adelaidians will know where I mean). When I got home I had the smarts to wash and rinse each lot and, rather than my usual slide them into ziplocs, I got a 4 section divided container and placed each bunch with their stems removed in a section with a little kitchen paper. This morning I had the most delicious blend of watercress, a pinch of basil, parsley (from my garden), and coriander all mixed into my egg whites. At lunch I’ll be able to grab a handful of each and sprinkle it through my salad and on my fish. I’m in flavour country!

Zucchini: Yesterday’s post is a prelude to my ode to zucchini. Maybe it’s the sunshine, but zucchini is making me happy. They’re not quite in season here yet (trucked in from QLD- my bad), but are already dirt cheap. They’re my new favourite breakfast vegetable. I grated a whole one and fried it up with a little of my flavour mix (pre-chopped spring onion and capsicum) then poured it into my egg white and herb mix and back into the pan to make the most delicious fritatta.

I’ve felt the urge to get back into sketch journaling again. I’m hoping this will help me find my creative mojo a bit more and a little peace and quiet in my comp addled mind.

Weird things:
Figure competing is a weird sport. I was chatting to the boy in bed the other night about my lack of mojo; the Austin Powers kind, not the aforementioned kind, and best explained it as the following. I feel a strange sense of conflict with my body image. By all normal sense of normality (huh?) I’ve got a lean, hot body. The boy tries to tell me this everyday and I know this is true. However, I don’t have a body which is yet ready to step on stage and be competitive. My goal is to have this competitive body, which in a sense means I need to be dissatisfied with the body I have. Am I? At many stages I’ve looked in the mirror and said this is where I want to be after I’m done. Boy pointed out that if this wasn’t for a competition goal then this would be the thought process of eating dissorder. Scary, but hopefully not the case. I think last night’s countdown wasn’t anything more than 33 days and I can appreciate what I’ve achieved. Typing this I realise that there’s nothing from appreciating what I’ve achieved already. I then worry about my motivation. THIS is where consistency takes over from determination……… and my whole post is wrapped up nicely!
Thanks blog.

A lot of people have commented, during their comp prep, that they have learned a lot about themselves. I was always curious about what these lessons where. Where they that obvious? Maybe it’s more subtle than that but everyday my bodybuilding journey informs the rest of my life and vice versa.

For a while now I’ve been complaining to ‘the lovely boy’ that I wished I could have the focus in the rest of my life that I have when I’m in the gym. I blamed it on all the supps, afterall that Thermofuel is pretty sweat stuff. Lately, I’ve been training on almost no supps (shock, horror!). Only taking aminos to stop my muscles falling off due to my massive calorie deffecite. However, even on my most sleep deprived days (and I’ve been zonked) I’ve managed to pull out some serious PB’s. How can I explain this, I wondered?

It’s simple. I go to the gym with a list of things I have to do. A bag with the equipment I need to do it and an allocated time-frame to do it in. I visualise success with every set. Only do one thing at a time. It’s a deadset formulae for success. If I get distracted by the weird things the 18yr/o PT’s are doing to their trainees or start day dreaming it all turns to muck, so I know not to go there.

Why not apply this formulea to getting other stuff done??

I’ve been dilly dallying about getting my new portfolio together so I can go for job interviews. I’ve ummed and arred about it for days and haven’t achieved anything. Then, eeek, a job interview comes up. So I spent yesterday in an unproductive panic. Today, being a new day (where I got enough sleep!) I thought about the process I use to get my bb stuff done and decided the focused, one thing at a time method may just work. Guess what? I set a PB. It’s all done and at the printers before meal 3. I’d estimated at least another 2 hours, which means I can have a nice nap now.

Once again I’m reminded that success is inevitable as long as success is living in the moment.