harddeck242’s BodyBlog

that’s why I know I will never be denied.

1st Physio session on knee yesterday and it’s an easy fix apparently so I’m looking forward to fixing it, then getting out and being stronger than ever. I really don’t enjoy how I feel after the month off for the baby so out I go. I’ll duck down to take a look at a local YMCA style gym where it’ll cost $11 a year then $2 per visit. Back to basics I say.

Today is Sept 2nd so by next week I’ll be lifting strong again and running like a reborn maniac, except without the wild abandon of my pre-injury days I suppose.

I think I’ve learned that even though I may take breaks here and there I can’t ever be flobby in my life. It’s just not an option.

I’ve said it before but I’m having too much god dam fun to think about quitting right now.  12 days to my first 14k race. 3 days til the new baby. 2 months since my daughter came out of her shell so to speak (those who know me know what I mean) and my son is smarter at 6 than i was at 13 I’m sure of it!

I’m leading my department professionally and seem to be the center of my own universe. I’ve learned so much from this journey and this site about giving back. I always thought that bodybuilding was a vain pursuit and it still can be if you make it one but to do it, then to teach it, then to inspire others to do it and getting the same joy from teaching as doing - you can’t help but think that this spot, right now, is a pretty nice place to be.

Knee is loads better so I feel like I’ve learned a lot about filling space with positive action and not just action.  I didn’t run for 2 weeks but I’m still as fit on my last 10 k as I was 2 weeks ago.  Continuining to bash it up was not the way to go so patience and nurturing of my spirit is just as important as nurturing my muscles.

Peace

Who loves a fat wet rainy run?  You’ve go to love it!

Knees still kind of sore from ligament damage last week but the week rest has been great. Still pretty fit plus joined a new running group and that helped. Still excited about City2Surf coming up in 2 weeks but even more excited about my trip to the hospital to extract a new baby girl next Friday.  Yay for us!

How in the hell would life get any better, can someone please tell me?

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you…..As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

-Marianne Williamson

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

I’ve been giving a lot of thought "post-gym" to how I keep myself aware of my state of play. At work we say that to give 100% customer satisfaction 100% of the time takes 100% clarity.

I feel I lose that when it comes to my own workouts and health and fat "post-gym". I don’t have the support or comforting surroundings or encouraging words from trainers re size etc. This means that it truly comes down to a race that’s long and hard but regardless of where I’m running it, the race is always ever against myself anyway.

And to win it takes focus, clarity of my goals, and complete CONSCIOUSNESS. Start each workout with a quick run to work out the kinks and build focus on plan for the morning then when run is finished, MAXIMISE IT!

Wow. How can you not feel punished when the rain feels like little pebbles against your cheek and the wind is so bad I was the only person I saw for the entire 35 minute run along the boardwalk.

8 more weeks to C2S and I bought my new Brooks today. I have to laugh every time I plan on going for a "short" run and then write down the words "8" and "KM" in the same sentence.  As if I ever thought that doing 8 kms in anything other than a powered vehicle was nothing short of insane. Need to tighten up my diet thgouh as I’ve been enjoying the break from the gym a little too much.

Maximise!

You know what the greatest part of a big arms workout is? Trying to lift your cup of coffee an hour later and getting the trembles about half way up.  Pumpitude!  One more rep!  Pumpitude!

 Avg temp here is around 15 C so it’s gonna take something special to run for the next 3 months. Only 4 more months until the 14K city2surf I’ll be doing so the plan begins today.  I can feel it already!

http://city2surf.sunherald.com.au/index2007.asp

Well, I say "quick" because it was only 20 minutes out of my day but if you want to get down to seconds it was a minute slower than my usual 2.5 miles.  But that’s OK because it was pitch black along the ocean and the sounds were incredible.  From the kid at the skateboard park doing fakie ollies (yes, in the pitch black dark of 6am - dedication at its best!), to the crashing and unseen waves.  I felt so incredible that next week I’m going to try for 6 and then 2 more each week just to see where I can get to.

Thank you to Growing up who has been a great support to me without judging. Very calm, grounded, sane person he is who has gone through some pretty insane stuff. This is why I love bb.com

Man I hate how easily I give in to the lazy voice in my head.  I’ve spent two weeks half-@ssing it because i didn’t "feel" like going hard.

I thought i was immune to all that.  Like I was different.  I quit my menbership and am still happy I did it but I just got sick of everything. Seeing the same people, doing the same things.  But that’s not external, that’s all me.  That’s me deciding to be sick of my surroundings.  So i either change my surroundings or i decide to love them.

I started to love them again as of this morning.  Had such a great arms pump that it gets my momentum back up again.  It sounds funny but I turned a corner on the street during my run today and (because I was wearing a tank top) it struck me that the shadow of my shoulders on the street looked a bit, uh, full and round.  I broke into a bit of a smile and that held my attention until i turned the next corner and it went back to my side again

Looking forward to tomorrow with a spin class at 6 then full on abs for half an hour then back to hit my shoulders again on Thursday with big pull downs and bent over rows.  I love jacking up 71 kgs on those rows. Almost as much as love 3 sets of 6 pull ups.  Almost.