MISSING: motivation!
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!
i always told myself that once i was in shape, i would never allow myself to slip back into the old habit that made my body bulge, back hurt, and confidence plummet. i think it would be a gross exaggeration to say that’s what happened, but that’s definitely the track i’m on at the moment. and no matter what i do, i just cannot seem to motivate myself to break the cycle.
my weight is back up to around 107, and although my eating is on track 85% of the time, my cardio is seriously lacking so my body fat is going back up slowly. i still fit into my size 0 jeans, but my muffin top is becoming more and more luscious (if i were actually a muffin that is!).
i just don’t know what to do to regain my motivation! i’m in a personal slump. so far 2009 has not treated me too well. first week of january i moved out of the apartment i was sharing with my boyfriend and back in to stay with my dad. the place was just too small for the both of us and we were feeling suffocated by not having our own personal spaces. i moved into my own place beginning of february and i’m now living alone for the first time EVER, which has been a weird adjustment. just after valentines and a few days before my birthday, jamie decided that his priorities are all focusing on his show (he’s going to be competing in the canadians in vancouver this august) and that he just cannot give his mind to anyone else right now, so he ended things with me. he no longer wants the obligation of a girlfriend, and wants to guilt-free put all his time and energy into training for his big day. i understand, but thought it was something i could support him through…
…i cried for about a week straight and then decided enough was enough. it is not over for us, just on hold for now. there is too much love there to say that never again will we be together.
however, with all that being said, i still can’t seem to get off my couch. i go to work, i train others for a living, and i spend the majority of my day demonstrating and lifting weights for people and with people, so my strength is still high and my muscles are constantly being worked, although not nearly as hard as i could be going. i’m making no advancements and i’m definitely not doing as much cardio as i need to be.
i’m thinking buying a skipping rope - that way i can do cardio at home without having to freeze my ass off going to a gym. besides that, i hate treadmills - if i’m going to run, i would rather be outside. i actually got up this morning motivated to go for a jog and then realized it had snowed overnight 
WTF?!!
March 12, 2009 at 7:56 am
LOL, You meant that "F" Bomb huh?
March 12, 2009 at 8:01 am
If you’re looking for some motivation to get a jump rope, check out Buddy Lee, He’s unbelievable!
http://video.google.com/videosearch?q=buddy+lee+jump+rope&rls=com.microsoft:en-us&oe=UTF-8&um=1&ie=UTF-8&ei=5xS5SdLCCYGCtwfPq4CYBg&sa=X&oi=video_result_group&resnum=4&ct=title#
March 12, 2009 at 8:07 am
Imagine every day to be the last of a life surrounded with hopes, cares, anger and fear. The hours that come unexpectedly will be much the more grateful.
Well my motivation is the day that I pack up all my gear and get on that plane i HAVE TO WAIT ABOUT 11 MONTHS! so I can see my kids!, I don’t worry about anything else!, I’m grateful that I’m healthy and to have to a beautiful family and two awesome kids, everythings else comes later, I wish you the best of lucks and a big hug all the way from Iraq
SSGT CHICAS
UNITED STATES MARINES CORPS
March 12, 2009 at 8:10 am
Don’t want to get you even more depressed, and people sometimes give their opinion too easily. But if there really were so much love in your relationship he wouldn’t have ended it because he needed to concentrate on his show. If a guy acts like that he is taking you for granted and isn’t worried that he could loose you.
We have all been down and we’ve all been depressed or lacking motivation, but the best way that I know to get out of that cycle is to just do it. I know I sound like a nike add. Buy a jump rope, I have one and swear by it. Buy some training gear so you have a little extra motivation. Do watherver you gotta do, just DON’T stay in a state where you are wasting your time and will later regret.
Heck you might even use your ex as motivation, I don’t know what kind of relationship you guys have/had but he might be the kind of guy who will loose interest if you loose you edge.
March 12, 2009 at 8:27 am
If your boyfriend was willing to give you up to put full concentration on his dream, why are you short changing your own progress by being depressed over what he did?
If he loved you, he’d use your support for strength and not reject you. He doesn’t sound like a great character to have in your life.
Be strong and get up off that couch and show yourself that no one controls your life but YOU.
March 12, 2009 at 9:23 am
Damn just look at your progress and think how long and hard it took you to get there. The best thing you can do for yourself is to maintain that hot body and find something new in your life! Trust me I just went through similar things in January and you have to look at it as an opportunity to be free and do what you want !