dubbledee’s BodyBlog

Okay so I bit the bullet and as embarrassing as it is I put new measurements up. NOT PROGRESS! Grrrrr. This stinks. Fact is, we vacationed twice this summer and I have has no support at home (getting to the gym, eating etc.) Now the hubs is on board again and I am enjoying him going to the gym to be with me. The children also do very well at the gym daycare now, which is available Mon, Tues, and Thurs. At least I can make it those days I KNOW! So with that said I had a my BF% checked on Monday and was up 2.5%. He said that I had gained 5 pounds of fat and 1.5 of muscle. At least it wasnt ALL bad. Now I have to cut this fat off. A 6.5 pound gain since summer! Gonna do this…… am doing this! Will update in 2 weeks!

Okay, so I have been a member here for a while now. When I started I wasnt as dedicated at heart as I am now. I want this so badly but what do I do when I have no support? I know this may not be a big deal to many of you but I am having a hard time getting the "family" to cooperate. THIS…… is all I ask for! I dont "ask" for anything else. Its in my heart, it makes me feel good.. mentally and physically! There is so much more too, that cant be put into words. I dont know what to do because I am being held back in many ways and it just drives me crazy! I worry about others and take care of everything and everyone else but what about me? How do I keep my heart in it if I’m not allowed to do so? I have been on and off since the summer because I keep fighting for it! Pushing! Then I give in and let it be. In the summer we did a contest and my husband and I was in it together. There werent many problems then but we just have a difference in opinions on the gym, working out, eating, etc. I just need to know how I can do this myself and not feel guilty anymore. Any suggestions? I do know this is more of an emotional thing but I just had to ask.

Okay, I just have to get this out. I have been posting progress pics for a while now and from time to time dont really see a whole lot of progress. I have to look closely. But this time….. CRAP! I see nothing… look thicker I think and I have lost 1% BF since the last pics. WHERE??? I feel like I totally wasted my time… and damn it I’m hungry too, grrrrr! I just dont understand what is going on with the bod…. I am still working very hard. The only thing I am noticing is that my rear seems to be doing a disapearing act. And NOT width-wise. Thats not cool at all! Another thing that is bugging the total crap out of me is that the left side is not showing definition…. I do freakin’ unilateral training too. On each muscle group I make sure I do at least one set…with the same weight……. Geez! What the crap do I have to do????

Okay so let me just say it: I DID IT TO MYSELF! Crap a few indescressions and you work all week just to get back to square 1!! Geeeeeeeeez! Finished the contest and was so deprived that I had not 1….. Not 2………. BUT 3 cheat meals…. not counting the chocolate cake, sodas, and other little bits of crap in between. WHY would I do that to my body???? I am having to dedicate this whole week to getting off the weight I put back on and the fluid I am retaining because of all of the sodium in all of the CRAP!!!! Plus mother nature is threatening to visit so this week will be VERY discouraging for me! I have been back on that DANG WAGON (which is a little harder to climb back on when your in your 30’s by the way) for 3 days now. Eating "clean" again! I am making progress too but I AM disappointed in my past actions. I know that I am better than that. So now that I have beat myself up and dusted off now its time to move forward and make this happen. For my peeps I just wanted to say that its hard to take that cheat meal and not binge…. at least it was for me. I wish I hadnt have even taken the first bite because I just kept pushing it. After I finished the scale read 5 pounds higher than my last weight, which I know is a combination of things so I do know its NOT all fat (I wasnt that bad, LOL) but seeing that number is disheartening when it was so hard to get to the former glory that was 150 (for me) and all you want is to do make PROGRESS! I am down a few of pounds already and will take care of this in the remainder of the week!! So when it comes time for my new Progress pics and measurements YOU WILL SEE PROGRESS!!!! Thanks for letting me RAMBLE ON!!!! LOL! I LOVE MY PEEPS!!! Dee

I have been on and off in this battle with my "demon scale". I know I always hear that the scale doesnt really matter, and I do know that but somehow we always revert back to that reassurance given from the scale that tells us that we are making progress. NOT! I have finally really come to the conclusion(as of now) that it really isnt just what the scale says. I do know that muscle weighs more than fat, but I know better than to believe that if the scale is not moving, I am displacing the fat with muscle as soon as I am losing it. Sorry but women especially dont build muscle "that" fast! LOL, I wish. Does anyone know by the way, at what rate it is possible for someone, particularly women, to build muscle, say in a months time etc.? That is with proper protien intake and supplementation etc. I know there are alot of myths out there and sometimes you just have gather alot of information yourself and it helps to see what the masses have to say also.

Well, I…. we (the hubs and me) made it to the gym today and had an AWSOME workout. We did our cardio and then worked our upper body……. I feel very good and confident, but good grief my poor triceps need tons of work. I know the whole package does but my tris are soooo weak and FLABBY!!! I’ll get them into shape though.

This is day number 4 of the contest and I am doing well on my eating, but havent made it to the gym as much as I would like to. This 1st week just started of bad I guess. Week 2 will be better….. I’m confident!

Okay, so last night and today I have been dealing with some creep on here and I think I have that nipped in the bud. Just for future references if any of my new friends or visitors cant speak to me like a decent human being then consider yourself ignored. I am not on this site to “hook up” and some people just cant handle rejection obviously, so with that said, I appreciate so much the friends that I do have so far. They have already helped me out and been so very supportive which is why I am here. THANK YOU, and I look forward to our future bodyspace relationships.