Welcome to my twisted mind!

Yes,

steroids work…Also T3 and T4 hormone medications…And DNP for that matter…I know about these because I did a lot of research. Pro and con…Steroids I do have personal experience with. When I was young I tried it. But it was different time…Different place. Back home we had easy access to it. All 100% real. All dirt cheap. And friends with years of knowledge to guide me on how to use it. I was fortunate to have them tell me to use it in moderation. Easy…Over longer period of time…Use this…Don’t use that….

These days, market is going crazy. Almost all is fake and almost everything is overpriced…By the time your friends friend whose aunt knows this bodybuilder who has this guy who gets him the stuff from his friend gets you the "gear" you are paying 5 people commission and have no idea where is that stuff coming from. When I say its fake it’s not completely useless. But lets say you are female who got Winstrol and is drinking it cuz you don’t like injections. And what if the stuff you taking is actually water based testosterone made to look milky and winstrol like…You are into a BIG surprise…And there’s NO way back. Also I see kids in the gym these days overusing it, compensating for hard work and/or proper nutrition. Believe me, it’s not necessary!!!!

You can build your body by following good workout plan, boosting calories and protein, supplementing and getting plenty of sleep. You can’t bulk 30lbs in 2 months, that’s true, but it is a game of patience after all. Nothing worth having comes easy in life and neither is this. But little by little, you build yourself up and then you look back at progress you made and results that are here to stay and it makes you proud!!  It makes you feel better person. It makes me happy I can set an example to my kid one day when he starts lifting. Guide him in right direction. If you cheat you only cheat yourself and everything you get comes with the price. Sometime that price is too much to pay!! Think about it. Think good and do research.

I’m not saying DON’T USE STEROIDS!!!

You going to do it regardless if you made that choice already, but be smart. Give it time and try natural first. Be patient. Educate yourself. That’s what this site is for.Dont look at top world athletes, they are genetic freaks. 10 out of 10.000.000 have genetics for pro stage. Just try to be best YOU can…Don’t strive to be someone else. No drugs will help you get there…

To all natural and "not so natural" friends here, I wish you good luck and strength and brains to make right choices in the gym and your life both. Don’t take this personal for I have good friends who use "gear" and it doesn’t make them less my friends. I respect everybody’s decisions and every person knows what’s best for them I guess. Just be careful.

Enough before half of this site start booing me. Lol…

Have a great week everybody and train smart.

Life is beautiful and short. Make the best out of it.

Today it was my friend’s birthday. We all went to Mandarin buffet…For people not familiar with it it’s buffet style Chinese and all other imaginable cuisine, full of greasy, sugary, breaded, deep-fried(should I go on or you get the picture?!?!?!) foods…

In my mind it was a test for me and I passed. Yes, I did!! I had raw veggies to start, some steamed plain shrimp and clams, grilled chicken on a stick, also grilled shrimp on a stick, mushrooms, a little of sushi, fruit and a lot of water…That was it…

I still can’t believe I didn’t give in. I mean, it’s not a big deal if I did. I’m not going to gain 10lbs if I cheat one meal, but for me it was big thing because it means I can be around foods I use to love and not be tempted to give in. I can really make this my life style, without fear I will go back to my old ways. And every time friends go for that beer and pizza I know I can go too, making healthy choices…

For all of you out there, trying to be your best I wish you the same. I wish you have strength in and out the gym and be who you are when it matters the most.

I know now I have no weak links. My chain is strong and here to stay.

That’s my accomplishment for today. Tomorrow….We’ll see…

Did shoulders today…

In short..

Barbell press behind the neck 4 sets.

10×185lbs

10×225lbs

9×275lbs

5×315lbs

Hammer strenght machine front press 4 sets.

12×180lbs

11×230lbs

9×270lbs

7×290lbs

Side latterals one arm 6 sets

20×25lbs

18×30lbs

14×35lbs

11×40lbs

10×45lbs

9×45lbs

Rear delts high cable crossovers 6 sets

20×30lbs

16×40lbs

12×50lbs

11×50lbs

10×50lbs

16×30lbs

Shruggs on the machine

20×2plates

20×3plates

16×4plates

14×4plates

10×5plates

Superset of dumbell shruggs non stop drop set
10x 160lbs

8×120lbs

7×90lbs

10×60lbs

15×35lbs

THing is, I was going really intense and fast. 30-45sec rest in between sets.

I’m happy with it and my shoulders are pumped and numb now…

HAd a banana and 2 slices of ezekiel toast with peanut butter and jelly.

Also 60g protein shake.

Going to watch the movie now.

Stay strong!!!! 

Hey everybody!!

Today is a happy day. I realized I CAN go on low carbs and not lose my mind. It’s hard, yes, but its all good now.

THose greens actually taste yummy(NAAAAAT….borat voice). Ok, maybe not that great but its food still. Also, started eating  eggs more(Egg beaters…No FAT) and its tasty and filling.

Cardio going strong. I walk incline for 5 mins then run for 10 min at 8,5m/h pace then I repeat cycle. I complete 45-60 mins of that after weight training at night. I box in the morning. There’s this great MMA workout tape by Bass Rutten. If you into that its a killer cardio, plus it keeps you sharp if you like boxing. Its really intense and tough tho. Try it, U’ll luv it.

In the gym I tried to go moderate with 12-15 reps but it just felt wrong…I’m used to use heavy weights and will stick to it. Otherwise I’ll lose motivation I’m affraid.

So, I get carbs first thing in the morning(oatmeal) and after workout(banana + Ezekiel bread). In the mean time I chow on veggies and have my protein up. 1.75 per pound right now(for me lean bodyweight is abt 225lbs) which is  395g of protein a day. I get 120g from protein shakes(2 a day) and the rest is solid foods. Tuna, Tilapia, Salmon, Eggs and chicken breast…Ah yes…Cottage chesse…I hate f****n thing too…But at night, before bed its all good. I’m starving anyway.

I try to stay in 2000cal range.

I’m down 1 pound in 3 days but feel much tighter, and not bloated.

My water is up at 2 gallons per day.

Sounds I’m doing everything right so we’ll see.

Only time will tell.

I am depressed a little today. Started superlow carbs and I don’t like it. I also miss red meat. I need it. I was not made to eat tilapia and chicken breast all day long. Not to mention canned Tuna. Seriously! Could it have tasted any worse?? Or its just low carbs fogging my brain. Maybe all is not lost. Just halucinating. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH(laughing histericaly)
Well, this way or another I started it now so I will tighten my skirt and pull my socks up and I will endure this because I want  to look my best.

This is a good place to let some steam out…It’ll be easier sticking my head in the fridge and stuffing my mouth with something good except there’s nothing in there…Loll

Even if there was I would still be here crying to whoever got nothing better to do than read my carb depleting comments.

To all who do, I wish you luck in reaching your goals and beyond. Strive high and dont limmit yourself. You can do anything if you want it bad enough and with that in your mind go and be the best you can possible be.

I always remember a quote Ronnie Coleman got on his fridge…"WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU KNEW YOU COULDN’T FAIL??"

I didn’t think of a thing big or good enough yet but it’ll make you busy if you try.

Thanx for stoping by and taking time to read this.

MEans a world to me!!

I am sick and tired of looking at my body fat. I know it’s a long process and that patience is the key, but I just can’t do it anymore.

So I decided to change things around yet again and focus mostly on fat burning instead of gaining muscle too…

I will switch to lower calories starting today, keep cardio high and do higher reps with moderate weights in the gym. I’ll try to eat as much vegetables as possible, substitute my complex carbs with broccoli and green beans where and when I can, switch to fish and chicken breast only and egg whites with no yolk.

I’ll be in 1800-2000cal range, spread over 6 meals, also trying to have my shakes with water instead with skim milk.

I hope I can at least stay in this muscle range but get ripped in couple of months. I can always go and add mass latter I guess, one of the blessings of being mostly endomorph. I need to kick my metabolism in hi gear and finally get to where I need to be. I need to win this race with myself and be free to set other goals for myself. I figure I got abt 15-20 lbs to go to see some good definition and I tend to burn those in 60 days. This is my new goal and I WILL do this. Keep checking progress pics for update on my journey.

Keep pumping, stay strong and enjoy life…Set goals and then go beyond and when you do, pat yourself on the back because you deserve it.

Ok, after countless days of strict regimen, diet and exercise and body and soul sacrifices, I decided it was time to let it go for one night and go out(friends birthday just gave me an excuse) and let some steam out.

So off we went…HE owns a bar, btw, so choice of place was obvious. Started at 9pm and went on till 5:30am…

It started great,  everybody had soooo much fun, overeating took place, at least Serbian cuisine consist mostly of grilled meat of some kind so my protein was up…Lol

I was drinking white rum and diet coke for fewer calories…And couple of glasses of Guinness to remind myself how it tastes…

Well, it was great while it lasted and it was a lot of fun….Till this morning…

All the food made me feel sick to my stomach, alcohol is chilling through my pores and I feel terrible in general. I don’t feel like moving around and just thinking abt gym makes my head and stomach turn.

All in all I don’t think it was worth it, I don’t think I’ll do it again any time soon and I DO KNOW I’m gona hit the gym today for sure. I love that light feeling when you have small meal every 3 hrs, when you feel tired after workout but full of life force and energy regardless. I luv the pump I feel the next day after I did heavy weights for ridiculous reps and destroyed my muscle just so it can rebuild itself bigger and stronger for the next workout.

My point is…My old life and habits are just that…OLD!!!

My new life is "IN" and I love every moment of it. When I have energy to outrun my children and puppy, when I can work hard and feel good abt it, when I can go to the gym at night after all day of work and still hit it hard…When I get complimented on my physique from strangers and friends alike…It feels great and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.

We made right choice doing this and we all should be proud. We should try to get as many people involved in this too. Get your dad or fat cousin off that couch and take that beer or a bag of chips from him. Take him/her for a walk or a bike ride…Or swimming….Anything. It’ll do good for you…It’ll do even more for them. Be the leader, not follower. Motivate people. Take pride in what you do!!!

And have FUN doing it…

Have a great week everybody.
Talk to you soon!!!!!

Friends of course…I’m just being a b***h abt whole thing.

Yes it was for my shoulder. And I have this wonderfull girl doctor named Jen. She is so tiny and sweet when you see her that you get fooled easily into thinking sesion is going to be like walk in the park. But if you allready had a treatment with her you know you are abt to enter a world of pain soon!!!

It starts with light massage and chat…Rotating shoulder, getting rid of stiffnes here and there…And then before you know it we are both sweating, wrestling and crying(I mostly do the crying part). She could proly kill the bear bare handed or at least hurt it bad!!! And she is all business when it comes to stubborn injury. To this day I didn’t learn to fully relax and let her do her thing. I still fight it a little(even though I try not to…I guess its body’s own survival instict kickin in).

At the end, when neither of us can handle any more, she sticks bunch of needles in my shoulder and chest and hooks me up to medival torturing machine that sends electrical waves through my muscles causing them to twich out of control for 15 min…But that is a RELIEF after BREAK & SQUEEZE treatment prior to it.

At the end, I thank her for everything(and promise to myself I will NOT be back there ever again) and then comes the best part- I got to pay for all that…

Off to my home I go, teareyed and in pain still, defeted and beaten by 135lbs blonde girl. No man would ever make me cry!!

But she does it every time…

After nice meal and a walk with my puppy, washing cars in front of the house and a little dispute with nosy neighbour I feel better allready. Off to gym latter and cycle goes on.

That was my day so far and it wasn’t that bad I guess. If anyone else can suggest anything abt sprained rotator cuff tendon reply.I’ll listen.

Ok, time to go, before I overdo it. Stay strong, pump weights and eat your vegetables.

See you at the gym or on bb.com

Cheers!!!

ITs hard to work 12hr shifts and it’s even harder to hit the gym after that.

I signed up to 24hr gym recently and it was the best move I could have made. This way I work, then spend time at home with family and then while everybody else is sound a sleep I go and hit the gym. Then I toss and turn later cuz I cant sleep with my metabolism in high gear…Loll

Well, just a lot of s**t going on at work. Dealing with people and their problems. How abt my problems…How do I stop and have my meal in the middle of  doing something. I manage, I guess.We have to. It’s the only way. Only right way that is.

I made all this not just short term thing but way of life. Everything else has to revolve arround this. Only then I can do it.

I guess I didn’t have much to say today… Its more than I do most of the time, tho.

HAve a great week everybody and hope I hear from you soon.

Feeling great today. Had good workout, going strong even on lower calories and increased cardio. It was chest day today. Usually limited by shoulder injury my chest workouts were…Well…Not so great lately. Today tho, I was doing 315lbs incline for 12, 10 and 9 and dips with 45lbs plate on the belt. Considering I`m 250lbs and have bad shoulder it was quite an effort!!!

I`m trying to put on muscle while losing fat and it works good. I stay with heavy weights for moderate or lower reps and take longer to recuperate between sets. I do 60mins cardio first thing in the morning and another 45 - 60 mins after weights.

Got home and had greatest protein shake ever…I mix Ice cubes, skim milk, flaxeed oil, glutamine, oatmeal and banana, add some Jello fat and sugar free  chocolate pudding powder, two scoops of protein and blend it…It tastes like heaven!!!

I feel good, full of energy still and can`t sleep yet…Lol

I guess thats why I`m starting this thing…

I`ll try to make this regular thing and update every now and then.

To all my friends and whoever is reading this thanx for stoping buy and have a great week!!