debbie bell’s BodyBlog

As though of you who know me this year has been quite a transitional - kaboom -lol- year for me- well to be serious - my back is very bad .. I have tried to hide it.  I do not want to go into detail .. however  when my books - yes plural for several books - will be published-you all will understand what my in- between lines mean.  And hopefully all of this tragedy will be over. Ok .. I know you all shake  your heads at this .. I would too if I did not have such a severe issue , the thing is this is real ,, and it is so debilitating more than I could have ever imagined.!!!  It is not like me to complain of such pain .. EVER!!!  I have never endured so much pain in my life -and I as a child have been used to pain .. which is why I am able to strive so hard in the gym and only can assume why I achieve what I do…just this pain now is a constant.. something that just does not go away.. docs give me med’s and I hate it .. I read what they do to you and it is not good … then I wonder .. will I ever ..EVER BE NORMAL .. WELL JUST PAINLESS ever again!!  the  worst thing is - is that fitness was - IS - my life - I am so very sorry that I can not be there for you all right now .. I just hope you all can understand between not being able to be myself and my dog very sick ( G-D forbid ) dying - I am down and out … as I suppose the saying is!!  Inbetween apts … till the end of nov.. life for me is ..well one of the most challenging times I have ever experienced!  
I am strong!  I know that … and as I pour my expressions out to you this eve.. I will tell you that I WILL SUCCEED!!! …
I will .. and I express my pain to those that are in the same situation because they too will succeed … only to have FAITH!! FAITH in themselves and faith in that they you will succeed beyond this drought!  
Yes I am feeling sorry for myself.. though it is okay to do so .. just it is not okay if I do not wipe my tears and know the sun will shine tomorrow!!  And I am not joking with that statement for those of you that might think this to be funny … this is real and those that have not felt their hopelessness yet .. do not take this seriously .. please save this blog .. for I will WILL be there for you when you need someone… as I know how it feels to need someone and not have that someone . as I know one day some one of you might feel the same .. I WILL BE HERE FOR YOU!!!   I will survive.. those that know .. one of my favorite songs by Gloria G.
In all seriousness … survival and happiness .. and knowing we are worth more than what we have been dealt .. that in itself will bring you to beyond the richest person in the world
I am here for you .. as I bless you all for you caring and wonderful comments
G-D bless
debbie with smiles!!!!

This entry was posted on Thursday, October 29th, 2009 at 1:11 am and is filed under Training. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.