dawnr1101’s BodyBlog

It’s going to be harder to eat every 2 1/2 - 3 hours at work because I have someone who is looking to get me into trouble for any reason that he can think of to make himself look better.

Just as a side note so that you can understand where I am coming from is that I work taking calls to assist with technical support with cell phones. I sit attached to my desk all day taking calls. Getting away from my desk is hard enough to do just when going to the bathroom. Now I guess I am going to have to do it even more in order to eat.

I use to just eat at my desk. Never anything awful like fish or tune. I always make sure I save that for my time away from my desk. This prick is going to do what ever he can to make this hard on me. I’m not going to let him hold me back. I have been nice for to long. There is really time time in my life for all this mess. I’m better than this.

Eating clean and pushing away all the junk food is hard enough at work (but, really it’s getting easier as each day goes by) but to have to watch my back because of him is just not right. I guess everyone has to go through this at some point…or maybe every day…I don’t know.

What would you do in my situation? Please don’t get me fired…lol

I am going to post up new progress pictures is about a week or two. I am a little scared. I have lost about 20 lbs since the last picture…I’m just afraid it will not show in the new pictures. I know I have dropped inches and I weighed myself this morning and I am 163lbs…so very close to the 150’s! Yay!!!

I have already been to the gym this morning. Now I am sitting here on the computer when I know that I should be getting my cooler together and I still need to shower before work. I guess I will end this here. I had a productive morning…did you? 

There is no way to fully describe how I have been feeling over the last few months. This journey has been a struggle and who would have thought that I would have to have so much strength to get what I want? I don’t me physical strength…I mean mental strength. My mind plays these really bad games with me and makes me feel like I should just be happy with the way that I am….I just can’t do that.

When I started my journey I was 189lbs. This is more than I have ever weighed but I just could not let myself get to 190lbs. It was to close to 200lbs.

I have heard some people talk about their weight and how they weigh as much as they did when they were pregnant. When I was pregnant I was 118lbs when I had my daughter…that mean that right now I am 46lbs heavier than I was at my highest pregnancy weight. That’s just crazy. I have lost 25lbs so far. I have lost it slow 1-2lbs a week but even on a bad week I can maintain the weight I have lost. This is a big step for me. I also have come so far that I don’t want to ruin the progress that I have made. This is a big change in my thinking. I would usually just say “I had a great week so I can cheat” that gets me nowhere fast. I know from experience.

I am finally ready to make the right changes and it feels great. I went to they gym this morning and I no longer feel out of place. I am there to make progress on my body and I am learning to love myself and my body again. This is a big change for me. I have not been happy with my body in about 6 or 7 years. That’s a long time to be unhappy with my weight. I was never ready to make real changes until now.

Have a productive day

I know in my last post I made a mention of where I would like to be by September. I also know that I would be pushing it to get there by then. I will just keep doing what’s right. I have come a long way in the last year….from reading about the proper way to live a healthy lifestyle to really putting those thoughts into action.

Reading about the proper way to live a better and healthier life can be overwhelming. It was for me. There is so much to learn and know. It can be confusing….I use to be one that would walk around the gym with no plan….no clue what I was doing..but not anymore!

I am also learning what to eat. How to make better choices and how to make healthy options that also taste good. I really feel good about everything.

Hubby said that he would pay for me to joing nutri system if I wanted to to help me lose this weight…but I said "no" I would rather do what I have been doing "the hard/right way" so that I will make real changes and not fall back into "fat" land.

My goal is just to keep learning and doing the right thing everyday, every meal to make myself proud and to hopefully one day inspire others. That is my ultimate goal.

Things are more positive now than they have ever been. I make goals and work really hard to be able to complete what I have started. I have my focus on something special right now and my new goal date is September 3. I’m not sure if I will get to where I really wanted to be by than but I will be closer than I was last year…that’s for sure. I want to be 125lbs and right now I am 164lbs. I am not sure if that is just to much to lose in less than 3 months.

I need to take pictures again…I’m never in front of the camera…ever

Things are positive and hubby is proud of me for sticking with it. I feel better about myself already. Its about time!

There are things that I have put into place to help me get to my goals and its working. Even when I eat something I know that I should not eat I feel different about it. I don’t make an excuse and eat bad for a week straight. I have a little bit and then move on…I know that I messed up and move on. I don’t beat myself up and then throw all my hard work out the window because of a simple mistake.

This is a big deal for me. I am working to make life changes and I know that it will not happen overnight. I will get there in time but I can say that I am doing better this year than I have ever before. It’s a learning process and that’s what I’m doing….learning.

I should be at the gym this morning but will go tonight instead. Today is my legs day and I am still sore from Mondays workout.

I also talked to my trainer yesterday and told him that my motivation level is not where it should be and we are working together to get me to my goals but things are just slow right now. I have so many changes in my life right now but I’m trying to keep up with my workouts and clean eating…it’s just hard sometimes……..

I had a pretty good week last week with my workouts. I have to get to the gym when I get up or I will not bother to go at all. My trainer sends me my workouts for the week and I have set up daily goals to ensure that I can reach my long term golas. I am very proud of myself for pushing harder than I normally would and for stepping out of my comfort zone. Lifting weights next to people who are more fit and men who live in the weight rooms has been a fear of mine. I feel like they are looking at me thinking "why is she in here?" I also feel like they are looking at me and thinking that my form is all wrong or the weights that I am lifiting are to light. I am getting past that though…I worked with a trainer at the gym so I know that my form is good and I also know that I am lifiting what I can and still pushing myself to better limits so that to me is hitting a goal right there.

Going to the gym makes me feel like like I am powerful…lifting weights make me feel strong and confident and I get a rush from it and want to do more. I have always felt like that that though even when I was using the weight machines 7 years ago. I prefer lifting weights over cardio any day

I have also added 1 ab excersise and 1 additional move for what everbody part I am working on that day. I have to add cardio this week and it’s a good time to do that because its spring break so I will have time this week to really push that.

I have a goal that I want to be in the 150lb range by my birthday on May 9th. I have my weigh in tomorrow so I hope to be at 171lbs and that will keep me on the 2lb loss per week to hit my goal. Wish me luck!

I need to get to the vitamin shoppe this week. I have a few things I would like to pick up before Friday. I have been stepping out of my box and really stepping up the game so I am real proud of myself for that. I have a goal that I want to be in the 150lbs range by my birthday in May. I am going to set my goals tonight and make sure that I can hit that number without any trouble. I am real positive about the future and I can that I can do it this time because I have goals and I want it…I really do!

Today is my day to relax and that is what I plan on doing. I have this new laptop and I plan on updating my mastercook program with some healthy ideas so that when I feel like I can not come up with anything new and I get bored maybe that will help me stay on track. There are so many good recipies online that I am sure I can keep things more interesting than I would if I had to only count on my own ideas….haha!

I feel pretty good about things right now and my weight is around 170lbs now and I want to be 155lbs by my birthday. I know that I can do that with all the hard work I have been doing so far. I do have a lot going on now and I know that I need to make sure that I do not over do it and that I get enough sleep. Last week was a little tough for me. It’s a learning process but I am getting better