Remember Robert Fulghum?
He’s the man who wrote All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten.
Wonderful words.
And then THE REAL WORLD comes along, steals your nap blanket, and takes your milk and cookies, too!
Here’s a possible follow-up for Robert Fulghum to investigate. It’s called All I Really Need to Know I Learned in the Gym and the book might feature the yellow triangle and its familiar exclamation point!
Do you see these stickers on the weight equipment at your gym? They’ve got that symbol and text that reads, something like, FAILURE TO COMPLY MAY RESULT IN SEVERE INJURY OR EVEN DEATH!
Nice.
Pay attention or this sh!t might hurt you and kill you. It seems almost absurd, but obviously the warning labels are necessary. There was a hole in the wall at the gym attributed to someone flying off the treadmill. I’ve never seen anyone actually do a face plant on one of those things, but I have seen people stumble and then quickly recover.
…
Okay, Okay, I have been that person. But, hey, I quickly recovered!
And anyone can recognize pinch points on various weight machines, though you’d have to be seriously NOT PAYING ATTENTION to place your hand under a moving weight stack.
Training partner: “How many sets are you going to do on this machine?”
(places hand on weight stack)
Other guy: “Well, about…”
(weight stack descends on training partner’s hand)
Training partner: “AAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEE!!!! OMIGOD, MY HAND!!!!”
I’m sure it has happened.
Warning labels and stickers are a surefire indicator that a lawyer has run some company through the ringer due to the absolute stupidity (or rotten luck) of some otherwise fantastic individual.
There’s a standing calf machine at the local Gold’s Gym. The cable runs directly in front of your face as you use the machine. It’s normally in the back of my mind, “Where would that cable fly if something snapped? Would it simply drop the weight or would that thing crack me between the eyes?”
Anyway.
Is your glass half full or half empty?
P.S. (Edited to reply to my own question below. D’OH!)

Ah, of course!
P.P.S.
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