Diary of a Mad Fat Woman

I ate crap for a couple of days - and now I’m sick. Sick as in, chest cold, head cold, gross, junkie, sick. I haven’t had a cold in AGES. (I used to keep bronchitis for months at a time). So now I need to figure out how to clean this stuff out of my bod. Back to drinking vinegar shots or something, I don’t know. (Don’t laugh, it was advice from a professional!!)

I just wanted to post and give a huge thanks for all of the encouragement, kind words, and friend requests I received after my last blog. You guys are simply amazing and I can’t thank you enough for being there for me when I needed it the most. Special thanks to Eric, my friend who led me to this site.

 Also, I went on my facebook acct and hey - this was my horoscope:

Leo: Don’t be so hard on yourself if you have a little slip-up this week in working towards a goal. No one can be perfect all the time, you know.

How dead on is THAT???

I just wanted to post and give a huge thanks for all of the encouragement, kind words, and friend requests I received after my last blog. You guys are simply amazing and I can’t thank you enough for being there for me when I needed it the most. Special thanks to Eric, my friend who led me to this site.

 Also, I went on my facebook acct and hey - this was my horoscope:

Leo: Don’t be so hard on yourself if you have a little slip-up this week in working towards a goal. No one can be perfect all the time, you know.

How dead on is THAT???

Ok, over Thanksgiving I gained back up to 352, but then last thursday I was back at 338, so I guess I was ok. But this past weekend was terrible. I had a binge like I haven’t had in a very very very long time. Serious binge. I lost control. Entirely. I *baked* and ate cookies, brownies, JUNK, I did McDonald’s, etc. It wasn’t so much that anything happened to trigger it, I just completely lost all control. Terrible. Sunday night when I came back to Summerville (I’d been at my parents) I was so upset and felt so bad I just took the longest bath of my life and cried, then slept. I hate being this size, I hate losing control that way, I hate that I can’t be a normal person, I hate that I have to fight this every moment of every day for the rest of my friggin life, and I hate that I’m not slim and pretty and normal with a raging great natural metabolism and I really really really hate that I can’t control this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!