What if its a fluke?
What I hate is that everytime I see progress, the rush of excitment I get from seeing a number change on the scale, or my pants fitting better, is met with immediate dread and fear that it won’t last! It can’t last. Beause so far, it’s been too easy. That’s not to say that I haven’t tried a million times when losing weight and being healthy has been too hard. It’s just that this time, its been, relatively breezy. Maybe because for the first time in my life, I have a pretty set routine, which is a lot easier to follow then when you’re a full-time student.
On July fourth, even though I had been a member of this site for longer than that, I actually decided to start eating cleanER … (not squeky clean), and start lifting weights regularly with a routine (not just doing whatever the hell I felt like), and … well, that’s it really. Since the fourth, I’ve lost about 7-8lbs. Which is unreal to me. All of a sudden I’m nervous that I need to be more strict with myself, that now that there’s been progress, everything I’ve been doing so far will go away. I’m terrified that in doing the same thing, I’ll gain more weight back. That just doesnt’ make sense.
I also rationalize my weight loss. I’ll tell myself that 2lbs was probably water weight. So really, I’ve only lost like 6lbs.
Maybe I’ll feel more comfortable this time next week if I continue to see progress … I wish I had more faith in the system, right now, it just feels like beginners luck.
July 21, 2008 at 8:32 am
You’d get a whole ton of faith in the system if you persisted with it. The thing about being ’strict’ is that it’s just a change. It’s neither strick or lax. It’s just a change that you can percieve in any way, shape, or form of your choosing. If you look at it from a birds eye view, I think you’ll find that you being what you call ’strict,’ which implies being limiting actually has the exact opposite effect on your life-it opens more doors than ever and leaves you more free than you’ve ever been!
October 10, 2008 at 4:31 pm
Hey girl! How is the training going? This is NOT a fluke because we are both losing weight the RIGHT way. Once I broke 180 pounds on the scale I knew I could lost the next 30 pounds. Last time I was losing weight I got to this point I was cocky and stopped writing my food journal and cheating on my diet. If anything this fuels my desire to get to goal and work harder. I now cycle carbs and omit nuts, nut butters and bread. Keep in touch! Check out my progress pics!