cawiau’s BodyBlog

And then get back with my daily life. For some reason last week was the day and I just had to bitch slap myself mentally since I had no body to do it for me physically!

I have been in this rut, feeling all depressed and shitty. Basically saying screw you to the diet and everything, when I realized that 5 months into this since beginning of 2009, I only lost a grand total of 0 lbs! But after my bitch slap, I am down 5 lbs, so you see bitch slap are affective!

I am not getting into the details of me being depressed and all, but to sum it all up: I felt like a failure. I felt it took me like forever to lose the first 50 lbs and to think that I have to lose another 100…and thinking of the battle and sacrifices coming up did not make it easy. Also other events helped along, feeling like a fat ass, etc.

Anyway, a good Bitch Slap is looking at yourself and being disgusted with what you see enough to seriously want to take it Pimp Style and Bitch Slap yourself if you could physically do it. Not disgusted and resolved to live like this for the rest of your life, but disgusted and wanting to get off your ass and do something about it!

Disgusted enough to hate what you have become with such a passion that you are ready to move mountains to make it happen and reach that goal that you have set for yourself. Disgusted enough that you say : Damn it, enough is enough, I may not look like I want too today but by GOD I will someday and the only thing that will get in my way is GOD himself.

And People, I had a serious come to Jesus moment… I have been going at this long enough, the self pity parties are so ineffective that taking the time in your day to go thru the motion is a serious waist of personal time, not to mention the person that is helping you throw that pity party to begin with.

So, the bitch slap was quite effective and next time I need one, I am going to look around for a Serious Pimp and pay him to BITCH slap me for good this time. I am tired of this old dance: one step forward, two steps back…and when you look back, you are way behind then where you actually started. My case, went on my first diet at 17-18, went from 255 to 225….a couple of years later, I was at 335! Yes, effective diet wasn’t it, I went one step forward to 225 and before I knew it, I was two steps back at 335.

The Dance of the short term goals, why? Because once you achieve that goal you get lazy and seat on your ass, and little by little, you add the weight that you have been killing yourself to lose in half if not less time it took you to lose it. Yes, only a few minutes to destroy a house (explosive) that it may have taken years to built!

Who else need a bitch slap? If you are too chicken for the real thing (like me), a good mental bitch slap is as effective!

This entry was posted on Sunday, May 17th, 2009 at 10:01 am and is filed under Training. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.