Blog Entry
Here I am seating down in front of my computer waiting for some paper to print so I can go back to studying (3 tests the next two days) and my wife brings up the whole weight loss issue again!
So, schoo/studying vs drama with wife weight! Guess what wins! :rolleyes:
Anyway, as a good husband I listen to her, her fears, her sadness and try to console her!
She feels ashamed for the weight she has gained, feeling bad, unatractive, etc!
Basically all the issues and insecurities that comes with being overweight!
I explain to her it took 5 years for her to gain it, will take some time for her to lose it! And how consistency is key…you get the drill!
We go over her calories and she had about 800-900 calories left to meet her daily intake that is 2,000 calories! She wanted to lower it because she want to lose more than the 1 lb I set for her a week!
She wants to get back to 120 lbs quick, we have a wedding to go to in December in Haiti and she wants to weight as close to 120 lbs as possible!
So here it comes again…we want it now, we want it today…heck, we wanted it 5 minutes ago! The american way of life…instant gratification!
I can’t judge because I used to be this way, the person that wanted to try every diet I saw, bought the whole 6 minutes a day 6 pack abs exercise…the velocity diet, the liquid diet!
Geesh, the things I have tried to lose this weight have made me balloned from 225 lbs to 335 lbs in 6 years! And I have but one person to blame: Me!
I wanted it all so fast, I wanted to be that guy with the 6 pack in 3-5 months instead of 1 year or two….I read those stories about people losing 100 lbs in 3 months and wanted to be them!
And every time I failed, as a prize, I added a few more lbs! It’s like adding salt to the open wound! Not only did I fail at the diet…I gained the weigth again!
It took time for me to re-program my brain to accept the small 1 lbs victories, the 1" lost, the old pants fitting! I am far from being at my ideal weight (whaterver that may be), but I am better now than I was 5 months ago!
Yes, a part of me still urge for those big numbers…but the rational and logical me know I have to stick with the program! I enjoy food, I eat my kit kat bars, my pizza’s, go out with friends, have my glass of red wine….but I enter it for my calorie intake for the day!
It is a battle, an on going battle! It will not stop when I reach 185, or when I bulk to 200…even when I am that 5% bodyfat…this is a battle to the end, to the day I lay on my death bed and give out my last breath!
Weight will be an issue in my life, it is part of whom I am! But I am turning the weight issue into a physical issue…it is about loving me and my body and perfecting it! It’s like builting that dream house that you are never done builting because there is always something that can be done better!
So, I expect to be here 3-5, 10 or 20 to 30 years down the road, no longer as the fat guy, but the fit one trying to remain on top of it’s game! It is a marathon, not a sprint and everyday I remind myself of that!
Now the reason why I am writting this!
My wife and a few threads on the forum remind me how far I have come and how far I have left to travel!
Day in and day out I see people coming here posting about those crazy diets they want to try or what should give better results!
I see 6ft tall grown man, in the 300’s lbs or more eating less calories than my wife that is 5ft 2 and 215 lbs!
Why? They want those results fast and quick! They want it know, they actually needed it 2 months ago!
Yet, you look around and they are no longer here in a couple of weeks, they did not update, they disappear…some come back (like I have), only to have gained some more weight!
Some learn and changes their ways, some still go after that goal of getting it as quick as possible!
I watch, I think, I smill….and I remind myself, MARATHON, MARATHON, MARATHON!
It may take longer, it may be frustrating, and I may want to give up…but those 55 lbs I lost in 6 months are mine!
I took 2 weeks off from the gym, I gained nothing!
I went away for a couple of days…actually lost weight!
Why? Because my body adapted and accepted the new me! this weight is my weight and I am not running on borrowed time!
In the past, 2-3 days away, I would have gaine 5 lbs, a weekend getaway…easy 7-10 lbs! What you lose quickly, you tend to put back even quicker with some interest!
Marathon!
February 21, 2009 at 3:16 am
This is a great blog my brother. It is very insightful and shows how far you have come. You seem to have a good attitude towards your weight and your approach to weightloss is comendable. Congratulations on what you have achieved tus far. You should be proud of yourself. Hopefully your wife’s eyes will open soon and she will start viewing things as you do. Good luck bro.
February 22, 2009 at 7:12 am
Thanks bro, appreciate it!
March 28, 2009 at 7:25 am
That was a wonderful post! Thank you for sharing your thoughts.