it’s like people can’t find someone else to bring their problems to..
I mean to EVERYTHING and EVERYONE. Right now I’m at my private studio and it’s blowing up; everyone wants to train with me. My nickname’s firecracker, i’m the only female trainer and so i’m the…"soft face" haha so on the 20,000 flyers and in the newspaper and soon to be a huge billboard in stamford there’s my face. I’m not camera shy but I am at the same time; I’m not an arrogant person and I carry myself well but am intimidated with all the publicity!
I guess the reason for me getting into that is more so because right now my schedule is jammed up the asssss. I work fulltime down here in stamford..wake up 345 am here bascially M-F 5-11 some days i’m here til 4 but then M-F i leave here drive up to norwalk to teach at a personal training trade school, then either run home or you know obviously i do have time some days but M/TH i run a speed camp for athletes 6-8:30pm. I’m putting together a fitness/nutrition program for children that will run after school M-F 2:30-5pm, I teach bootcamps T/TH/sat mornings so i have sunday off. I also take clients and work with a boxer in a boxing/ fitness program. I know it sounds like alot but if it was any less I’d be so bored. I’m too motivated and have too much energy; its not OVERBEARING but just enough busyness…
I’ve always been the one to turn to though. Whether it be for silly things or serious. Lately one of my good friends has been going through alot; i mean serious shit that’s been going on for years. I have always been there; i really have no family so my friends are my family so I’d do anything for them. I take her to the hospital everytime, I’m there when she has a breakdown, i look after her i do everything and lately i’ve been getting frustrated because i’m so busy that it’s like i just wanna say dude this isn’t my problem! I know i choose to do everything i do but i don’t like feeling frustrated. It makes me conscious feel guilty. I have always had a huge heart, and I don’t need thank yous and I don’t expect anything in return.
It’s the little things that DO matter; a smile; a handshake, a friendly compliment even holding a door for a stranger. I get so overwhelmed from being through so much in my own life let alone going through so many experiences of other people.
It might sound silly to some people but deep down even though i am not super religious i feel like one of the biggest reasons why i am here is to bless people. to be a caretaker. Anything i’ve been through that’s made a huge impact on me has been me in the service of others. it humbles me and it’s not like this is the first time i’ve been frustrated with…i guess a gift. Ok now this seems strange even writing it to me but i’m serious it’s like no matter what other people say for some reason i’m just that final word that calms the person. That finds the ‘right’ solution…i guess lately i’ve just felt blown up with everything going on.
so just a little vent relief haha
