The workings of a bipolar mind.

Tonight was back and biceps. I’m looking in the mirror doing bicep curls and I was pretty proud of myself. I could see the definition in my arms and shoulder. I even flexed a little (when I thought no one was looking of course). I was quite proud of the little things called biceps. I have moved past flea bites to gumballs! Yipeee! I came home thinking I’ve gotta take some pictures of my new found muscle (before they shrink again). Took a couple of shots but for some reason they don’t show up in the picture. Did I leave my biceps at the gym cuz I swear I had them. Maybe it’s the lighting? I don’t know but I guess if I want to check out my biceps I’ll have to make sure I do it at the gym, that or remember to bring them home with me. Next week I’m moving up the dumbbells to 17.5 lbs. Maybe they’ll come back than.

So today was leg night at the gym. I think I did pretty good. I had wanted to get on the leg press machine before my walking lunges but a kid got on it before I was finished with squats. First I was alittle irritated. He probably wasn’t even about 16 years old, all he had on there was 2 10lb weights. I was thinking what a waste of time. I could be on there right now pushing some real weight and this kid is farting around. Then I took a breath and realized I’m being a bitch. This kid is trying to do something positive and productive and I’m not being nice. If he can only push 20lbs, that’s ok, he’s doing his best and that’s what matters. He’s not one of the kids that comes in with their parents and the parents don’t want to pay for the daycare so their kids hang on the equipment like it’s the monkey bars at school. Now that’s irritating! Anyways, I finally got to use the leg press and was able to do 360lbs for 3 reps, twice. Not bad I guess. My goal is to go up to 10 plates. Believe it or not I was able to do 12 plates before. I’ll be back there before I long.

So last night I trained chest and tris instead of just chest. I wasn’t sure if I’d have the strength for tris after chest. Usually my chest is quivering when I’m done. I was able to do the same amount of weight that I would have done on a single night so I was quite pleased. I’m already sore this morning, everything is starting to feel nice and tight. Tonight is leg night! The best part about leg night. No cardio!!! Wooohooo!

Ok, so I blew my diet this week. I know I shouldn’t be hard on myself but I feel fat right now. Yes, I know I’m not fat but I just don’t feel very good about myself. Anyways, tomorrow is a new day. I’m going to try and train 2 parts a day instead of one and see if I’ll see results faster. So tomorrow it’s going to be chest and tris.

I just got back from the pool. There was a lady there with some older kids and a 2 year old. The little one had a vest on and was just floating around in the pool, no biggie. Mom tells them it’s time to go, she pulls the little one out and takes the vest off her. Off course the little girl doesn’t want to get out yet and is crying about it. Mom’s hanging up the vest on the fence not watching the little girl. This 2 year old jumps back in the pool and even though it’s in the shallow end it’s still over her head. Not once did the mom turn around to look and see where this little girl went. I’m watching this little girl struggling in the water. She can’t get her head above water and she can’t reach the side. I yell at the mom because I’m on the other side of the pool and can’t get to her. The mom, calm as can be turns around strolls over and reaches in and pulls her out. I could never sit there and watch someone drown but I just thought, what if I didn’t say anything. Another few seconds and this would have turned into something tragic.  My son is 9 and a good swimmer. I still keep constant watch over him. It doesn’t take much for someone to drown. You hear about it in the news all the time. She left a few minutes after that. Didn’t look at me once, like I wasn’t even there. I was so f*&%ing pissed. Not because she didn’t say thank you or anything, but the fact that she was so nonchalant about the whole thing. Like it was no big deal. My heart was leaping out of my chest. How can you be so calm. Anyways, people please watch your kids in the pool. Just needed to vent!