bettybombshell’s BodyBlog

I found myself reaching desperation, sitting at the surgeons office awaiting my consultation for liposuction surgery.  This past year has been a very tough one for me, one filled with binge eating, extreme dieting, weight loss clinics and even a breif stint at food addicts annyomous. I sat there thinking of how i managed to make it there in the first place, i never needed any of it when i first decided to start fighting the battle of the buldge, and yet now, still at 162 pounds, down from over 200, i feel completely defeated. It will cost me $10,000 to remove the few inches of body fat that haunt me every day…it really seems so easy and worth the money to go through the procedures, but the more i think about it, the more i feel down. Is this what i have driven myself too?  In reality im looking for every way out instead of doing the only thing that really works and that is looking inside myself really make the changes necessary to be the person that i derserve to be, and that i know i can be. With that being said, i have finally reached the bottom, and have decided to reach the top without surgery. Instead of using my relationship with food to hinder my goals, my food addiction never really seems to manifest itself when i get to eat every 2-3 hours. What a great way to tame that beast. It is releving to finally hit this point where i am just so tired of failing that its time to win…. this morning my eggwhites and oatmeal have never tasted better, they tasted like victory and now they only thing thats going to stay fat are my pockets.

i would just like to say… that i hate dieting.  but its soo worth it.