sweat club

Since ive been back, 2 weeks now I have managed to do the following:

Gone to the gym 3 times in total :s

Been drunk 5 time, hungover another 5 days, making that 10 days out of 14 that I’ve killed brain cells and leached nutrients out of my body.  Great.

Have not been getting the amount of work that I need to get done. Why? Distractions from every corner, up right left..

One of my best friends is going through a rough time in her life right now, but by helping her I think Im going down with her. Like friday I clearly did not want to go out cos I could feel myself getting sick. Now I am sick n paying for it.
Yesterday I emptied the vodka n wine that I had left. I always do this when I drink too much, but this time around I felt like an alcoholic throwing it out. This scares me, because I don’t want to be one of these ppl who have to stop drinking forever. Not that I would miss it. But just knowing you can’t do something, makes it that much more tempting. But clearly I can’t control my alcohol intake. Its ruining my ****ing life. There I’ve come out and said it. It inteferes with my health and my school. What am I supposed to do ? Tell my friends not to ask me to drink with them?

WHEN I GET BACK, I MUST DO THESE:

1) go to bed at 11pm

2)have breakfast in the morning, i dont care if this means 30 min of less sleep

3)all work must be done in the 5 weekdays, weekends must be absolutely free

4)dont even DARE miss one class

5)gym gym gym gym gym gym gym gym gyyyyyyyym

its been 3 weeks since i went to the gym and right about now im starting to feel like a real fat ass. been eating nothing but junk, shut out the whole world accept for the strangers on the internet. everyone here tells me how much weight ive lost n how i should maintain it. but i dont get it, can 7 pounds make such a difference?  i dont see it .. maybe my face isnt an inflated balloon anymore but i wish they’d shut up. i feel pressured n in turn am stuffing more sugar n salt down my throat. i tried the treadmill, but 30 degree weather is no joke! plus the neighbours are renovating, 5 minutes on it n i wanted to pass out from paint asphyxiation . its so hard now and boring. i pop through 40 songs in 3 min and cant get into any rhythm, any flow…whaats happening!