Andrew’s BodyBlog

When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the cellulose cells which have connected with others to assume mass amongst the human body, this causes imbalance to the separate and equal station to the human anatomy, the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitlement to a healthy, lean body, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation of cellulose. We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all teams are created equal, but Team Three is more equal than the others; that we are endowed by our Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of lean mass, hawt chicks (or dudes) and of Happiness there of. Now therefore, to secure these rights, Team Three is instituted amongst the teams of the January 2009 competition, deriving their just powers from their inner strength, their unquestionable support for others, and consent of the governed, –That whenever any Team Three member becomes inactive, it is the Right of Team Three to motivate and push that member to get back on the wagon in the pursuit of abolishing cellulose, and to institute new lean mass, muscle, smooth skin, and general hawtness, laying its foundation on such principles as a solid diet, strong workout routines, a fantastic sex life, and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety, Happiness, pursuit of hawt chicks (or dudes), and a hard body. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Team Three?s newly establishment should not be changed for light and transient causes; and that all members will train out of their minds and body, never quit, work for that extra rep, run for that extra mile, and push away any temptation that would otherwise negatively effect the themselves and or the Team. Accordingly, all experience hath shewn that Team Three are more disposed to slaughter the enemy (cellulose), and while the evils of laziness, cravings, being a fat ass, are sufferable, quitting is not. Team Three members will never quit and would rather die than to wrong themselves or the team by abolishing this quest for a lean, hard body, hawt chicks (or dudes), and a fantastic sex life. Their current bodies, their ruined temples which can be rebuilt, and the forms to which they are accustomed, being fat are only temporary. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute obesity, it is their right, it is their duty, to train like a maniac, to diet without remorse, throw off such cellulose, and to provide new lean body mass and muscle for their future security of a hard body, hawt chicks (or dudes), and a killer sex life. Such has been the patient sufferance of these men and women of Team Three; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former lifestyles, eating regimens, and workout habits. The history of the present body is a history of repeated abuses, laziness, injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of the absolute Tyranny of cellulose over these bodies. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world with pictures, posts, and weekly updates. When you train and diet, train and diet out of your mind. When you train and diet, train and diet like the Zombie you are.