Being greatful
3 months ago i was in a terrible funk , I was neither proud of myself nor did I beleive I had the ability to change.
I felt I had no courage left no more strength to carry on, and when I looked in the mirror my body reflected exactly what I was going through.
I have never been an overweight person YES i have gained a few and could lose a few but inside was a 300lb woman screaming to pop out of me. I was and am a food addict. I use food to control how I feel, I eat privately or in secret I have binged and purged most of my life, not only to be thin but to feel releif.
This topic is not a populor one. Most woman at 39 do not to admit they still binge and purge. It was semi ok when I was 25 but now it seems most would prefer to suffer in silence and hide away and keep secrets.
Using food as a drug is terrifying exhilerating and most of all soul killing.
I desire crave wish pray and humble myself every day to the gym. I feel insecure uptight afraid before i go but ….I DO IT ANYWAY.
I started going to a Naturopathic Dr. this saved my life literally I am being renewed by the plan that I have been put on.
He asked me "can you follow direction?" Can you beleive that your body can heal itself?
From that day my life has chnaged and bleieve me not one day has been just easy.I know that an althlete is aperson who does does not take the easy road. Chanllenge is the motivation, easy is not motivating .
Athletes are not just what is seen on the outside it is a way of thinking and then carrying out the challenge. The goal is to win the challenge is how to get that win.
Athletes don’t quite when theylose they still practise the next day injured tired sore depressed they continue on. They are motivated by the challenge not the win. The wins are great but even when they win they still still want to win another.
I move my body everyday now. I challenge myself to esceed my expectations
