Getting Ripped!!!!

"Take off your shirt," says Hannah (Emma Stone)
(Jacob (Ryan Gosling) removes his shirt)
"Seriously? It's like your Photoshopped."

The once-boyish Ryan Gosling is now ripped, as seen in the trailer to his latest film, "Crazy, Stupid, Love". No, I'm not gushing over his transformation (though I suspect there's a growing trend of celebs who take on roles to secretly get in shape... cough **Gosling** cough) nor his movie, but this piece of sh*t trailer and the warmer days ahead made me question how many guys (including, no wait... make that ESPECIALLY me) would feel if a girl asked us to take off our shirt.

Sure, some of us could afford to lose 10 or 20 (or cough **50** cough... damn this cold!) pounds, but where does that leave the other end of the continuum -- the skinny man? The poor, poor skinny man. Unlike his buff counterpart who is considered sexy year-round, the skinny man's sex appeal is largely determined by the flavor of the month. And if Hollywood is any indication, it's clear that summer 2011 is about getting ripped. Sorry, swimmers, hipsters, rock stars, and Russell Brand.

Us fatties were never in vogue, unless Tony Soprano counts.

Ryan Gosling can depend on tons of Hollywood trainers and the best nutrionists in the world to help prepare him for this rols. So what does the average guy have? Well we have something even better, Bodybuilding.com! Seriously, since I've been here I've learned more tips and strategies for building muscle, cutting fat and just being a better athlete. Here I have access to the pros (the Dorian Yates videos are just inspiring), I have other athletes who are competing adding me to their bodyspace to cheer me on and make me do that one last rep. I'm in awe of the community and I'm certain that I'll be ripping my shirt off soon to to Emma Stone to show off my perfectly sculpted abs!

I'm pretty sure that's illegal though. Especially after 9/11, where everybody got so sensitive. Thanks a lot, bin Laden.