Thoughts of a Feisty Red Head

I think it might be. I kept debated on whether or not to right this post, but I woke up this morning and thought why not…

A couple of weeks ago my ex came by, it was late afternoon,I do not see him much, he was standing on the front porch, now he was talking to me, his lips were moving and all I could do was stare at his "gut", like a deer caught in the headlights. It was huge!!! It took every ounce of self control not to say anything or laugh, you’ve seen the dimples on a golf ball, well he looked like he swollowed a giant golf ball, he had on a thin t-shirt so it really showed…The reason I bring this up is because right before we split up he said that I was overweight and unattractive, which in my mind translated to fat and ugly, to this day that hurts to the core.

My life is turning around and I am in much better shape and will continue to make changes, I recieve alot of nice comments and encouragement from people here. I could not do this without you guys … Thanx 

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That was the question at the end of an initial meeting with a MFCC(marriage,family,child,counselor).

I thought it would be fun to share some personal stories with you guys since you are like family to me.   Well…

That was about 18 months ago, my soon to be ex-husband and his mom both thought I was depressed, this coming from two people that were taking psycotropic meds prescribed by our family Dr. and neither of them were in therapy. So I go.

The first question was how do you sleep at night? fine, no problem.

Do you feel tired during the day? No.

Have you ever had thoughts of suicide? No, no man is worth killing myself over, I like myself way to much to do any harm to me(funny she never asked if I ever had thoughts about doing any harm to my husband!!!).

Did I have any loss of appetite ? Honey I am 235lbs(at the time) do I look like I missed a meal ???!!! She just laughed… at the end of the session she said why do you think you are depressed? I explained. She said with all you have gone through any normal person may have been depressed she said the only thing you are is MAD…

Nothing wrong with that. She told me I did not have to come back, but she did enjoy talking to me. I laugh when ever I think about this story, I think they wanted something to be wrong with me…hehehe 

Oh, I did ask her what she meant when she said "any normal person" she said she liked the way I analyzed things for myself. I impressed the therapist, go figure… 

When I was growing up I knew maybe four kids that were overweight, now it seems that it is epidemic. Kids don’t seem to be bothered by it and neither do adults !!! I did not become overwieght till about 10 years ago.

We make larger more fashionable clothes, and now there is a show called how to look good naked, which seems to consist of large woman… I’m sorry but there is no way I would want my fat body on a show like that, instead I choose to workout and diet. We have fast food and convience everywhere we look, when does it all end. I understand that people work full time and don’t seem to have time to cook, how about a crockpot or cooking and freezing foods ahead of time ??? Instead of using time as an excuse. Surgery has become a common solution and insurance companies are even willing to pay for it.  I am sorry to be ranting but it just makes me mad when people make excuses for being overweight. I have no excuse. I really like coming to this website and chatting and seeing results of the people here who are after the same thing…hard work and clean eating = good health and a healthy body.

Thanx again for letting me rant.

Happy Halloween !!!

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