What gives people motivation? To some people it is anger such as myself, what I mean is that when I get angry over a situation it helps relieve that anger and I become more focused in the gym to help get rid of the anger so it doesn’t plague me throughout the rest of the day. Some people it is jealousy, such as I want to look better than so and so at the gym or someone they know. Others still is just wanting to be the best that they can, and others still is vanity to be able to get people of the opposite sex easier. There are still way to many to mention here. i was just wondering what motivates you the reader. Hit me back and let me know!
A motorcycle patrolman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well. However, the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs in his crotch. Worried that it might be a second surgery and the doctors hadn’t told him about it, he finally got enough energy to pull his hospital gown up enough so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable. Taped firmly across his pubic hair were three wide strips of adhesive tape, the kind that doesn’t come off easily. Written in large black letters was the sentence: "Get well soon….from the nurse in the Jeep you pulled over last week…"
For those unfamiliar with these awards, they are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled hot coffee on herself and successfully sued the McDonald’s in New Mexico where she purchased the coffee. You remember….. she took the lid off the coffee and put it between her knees while she was driving. Who would ever think one could get burned doing that - right? That’s right; these are awards for the most outlandish lawsuits and verdicts in the U.S. You know, the kinds of cases that make you scratch your head. So keep your head scratcher handy. Here are the Stella’s for the past year: 7TH PLACE: Kathleen Robertson of Austin , Texas was awarded $80,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The store owners were understandably surprised by the verdict, considering the running toddler was her own son. 6TH PLACE: Carl Truman, 19, of Los Angeles , California won $74,000 plus medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Truman apparently didn’t notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor’s hub caps. 5TH PLACE: Terrence Dickson, of Bristol , Pennsylvania , was leaving a house he had just burglarized by way of the garage. Unfortunately for Dickson, the automatic garage door opener malfunctioned and he could not get the garage door to open. Worse, he couldn’t re-enter the house because the door connecting the garage to the house locked when Dickson pulled it shut. Forced to sit for eight, count ‘em, EIGHT, days on a case of Pepsi and a large bag of dry dog food, he sued the homeowner’s insurance company claiming undue mental Anguish. Amazingly, the jury said the insurance company must pay Dickson $500,000 for his anguish. We should all have this kind of anguish. 4TH PLACE : Jerry Williams, of Little Rock, Arkansas, garnered 4th Place in the Stella’s when he was awarded $14,500 plus medical expenses after being bitten on the butt by his next door neighbor’s beagle - even though the beagle was on a chain in its owner’s fenced yard. Williams did not get as much as he asked for because the jury believed the beagle might have been provoked at the time of the butt bite because Williams had climbed over the fence into the yard and repeatedly shot the dog with a pellet gun. 3RD PLACE: Third place goes to Amber Carson of Lancaster , Pennsylvania because a jury ordered a Philadelphia restaurant to pay her $113, 500 after she slipped on a spilled soft drink and broke her tailbone. The reason the soft drink was on the floor: Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an argument. Whatever happened to people being responsible for their own actions? 2ND PLACE: Kara Walton, of Claymont , Delaware sued the owner of a night club in a nearby city because she fell from the bathroom window to the floor, knocking out her two front teeth. Even though Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the ladies room window to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge, the jury said the night club had to pay her $12,000…..oh, yeah, plus dental expenses. Go figure. 1ST PLACE: (May I have a fanfare played on 50 kazoos please?) This year’s runaway First Place Stella Award winner was Mrs. Merv Grazinski, of Oklahoma City , Oklahoma , who purchased a new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On her first trip home from an OU football game, having driven onto the freeway, she set the cruise control at 70 mph and calmly left the driver’s seat to go to the back of the Winnebago to make herself a sandwich. Not surprisingly, the motor home left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Also not surprisingly, Mrs. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not putting in the owner’s manual that she couldn’t actually leave the driver’s seat while the cruise control was set. The Oklahoma jury awarded her, are you sitting down, $1,750,000 PLUS a new motor home. Winnebago actually changed their manuals as a result of this suit, just in case Mrs.. Grazinski has any relatives who might also buy a motor home.
I hate it when people forward bogus warnings. I have even done it myself a couple of times unintentionally, but this one is real, and it’s important. Please send this warning to everyone on your email list. If someone comes to your front door saying they are checking for ticks due to the warm weather and asks you to take your clothes off and dance around with your arms up,
DO NOT DO IT!! THIS IS A SCAM!!
They only want to see you naked.
I wish I’d gotten this yesterday. I feel so stupid.
YES, I’M A BAD AMERICAN I Am the Liberal-Progressives Worst Nightmare. I am an American and believe in God. I ride Harley Davidson Motorcycles and believe in American products. I believe the money I make belongs to me and my family, not some Liberal governmental functionary be it Democratic or Republican! I’m in touch with my feelings and I like it that way! I think owning a gun doesn’t make you a killer, it makes you a smart American. I think being a minority does not make you noble or victimized, and does not entitle you to anything. Get over it! I believe that if you are selling me a Big Mac, do it in English. I believe everyone has a right to pray to his or her God when and where they want to. My heroes are John Wayne, Babe Ruth, Roy Rogers, and Willie G. Davidson that makes the Awesome Harley Davidson Motorcycles. I don’t hate the rich. I don’t pity the poor. I know wrestling is fake, and I don’t waste my time watching or arguing about it. I’ve never owned a slave, or was a slave, I haven’t burned any witches or been persecuted by the Turks and neither have you! So, shut up already. I believe if you don’t like the way things are here, go back to where you came from and change your own country! This is AMERICA ….We like it the way it is! If you were born here and don’t like it you are free to move to any Socialist country that will have you. I want to know which church is it exactly where the Reverend Jesse Jackson preaches, where he gets his money, and why he is always part of the problem and not the solution. Can I get an AMEN on that one? I also think the cops have the right to pull you over if you’re breaking the law, regardless of what color you are. And, no, I don’t mind having my face shown on my drivers license. I think it’s good…. And I’m proud that ‘God’ is written on my money. I think if you are too stupid to know how a ballot works, I don’t want you deciding who should be running the most powerful nation in the world for the next four years. I dislike those people standing in the intersections trying to sell me stuff or trying to guilt me into making ‘donations’ to their cause. Get a Job and do your part! I believe that it doesn’t take a village to raise a child, it takes two parents. I believe ‘illegal’ is illegal no matter what the lawyers think. I believe the American flag should be the only one allowed in AMERICA ! If this makes me a BAD American, then yes, I’m a BAD American. If you are a BAD American too, please forward this to everyone you know. We want our country back! WE LIVE IN THE LAND OF THE FREE, ONLY BECAUSE OF THE BRAVE!
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You all remember Sheriff Joe Arpaio of Arizona , who painted the
jail cells pink and made the inmates wear pink prison garb.
Well………
Maricopa County was spending approx. $18 million dollars a year on stray
animals, like cats and dogs. Sheriff Joe offered to take the department
over, and the County Supervisors said okay. The animal shelters are now all
staffed and operated by prisoners. They feed and care for the strays.
Every animal in his care is taken out and walked twice daily. He now has
prisoners who are experts in animal nutrition and behavior. They give
great classes for anyone who’d like to adopt an animal. He has literally
taken stray dogs off the street, given them to the care of prisoners,
and had them place in dog shows. The best part? His budget for
the entire department is now under $3 million. Teresa and I adopted a
Weimaraner from a Maricopa County shelter two years ago. He was
neutered, and current on all shots, in great health, and even had a
microchip inserted the day we got him. Cost us $78. The prisoners get the benefit of about $0.28 an hour for working, but most would work for free, just to be out of their cells for the day.
Most of his budget is for utilities, building maintenance, etc. He pays
the prisoners out of the fees collected for adopted animals.
I have long wondered when the rest of the country would take a look
at the way he runs the jail system, and copy some of his ideas. He has
a huge farm, donated to the county years ago, where inmates can work,
and they grow most of their own fresh vegetables and food, doing all the
work and harvesting by hand. He has a pretty good sized hog farm, which provides meat, and fertilizer.
It fertilizes the Christmas tree nursery, where prisoners work, and you
can buy a living Christmas tree for $6 - $8 for the Holidays, and plant
it later. We have six trees in our yard from the Prison. Yup, he was reelected last year with 83% of the vote. Now he’s in trouble with the ACLU again. He painted all his buses and
vehicles with a mural, that has a special hotline phone number painted on
it, where you can call and report suspected illegal aliens. Immigrations
and Customs Enforcement wasn’t doing enough in his eyes, so he had 40
deputies trained specifically for enforcing immigration laws, started up
his hotline, and bought 4 new buses just for hauling folks back to the
border. He’s kind of a ‘Git-R Dun’ kind of Sheriff.
TO THOSE OF YOU NOT FAMILIAR WITH JOE ARPAIO HE IS THE MARICOPA ARIZONA COUNTY SHERIFF
AND HE KEEPS GETTING ELECTED OVER AND OVER. THIS IS ONE OF THE REASONS
WHY:
He has jail meals down to 40 cents a serving and charges the inmates for
them. He stopped smoking and porno magazines in the jails. Took away their
weights Cut off all but ‘G’ movies. He started chain gangs so the inmates
could do free work on county and city projects. Then He Started Chain Gangs For Women So He Wouldn’t Get Sued For Discrimination. He took away cable TV Until he found out there
was A Federal Court Order that Required Cable TV For Jails So He Hooked
Up The Cable TV Again Only Let In The Disney Channel And The Weather
Channel. When asked why the weather channel He Replied, So
They Will Know How Hot It’s Gonna Be While They Are Working ON My Chain Gangs. He Cut Off Coffee Since It Has Zero Nutritional Value.
When the inmates complained, he told them, ‘This Isn’t
The Ritz/Carlton……If You Don’t Like It, Don’t Come Back.’
With Temperatures Being Even Hotter Than Usual In Phoenix (116 Degrees
Just Set A New Record), the Associated Press Reports: About 2,000 Inmates
Living In A Barbed-Wire-Surrounded Tent Encampment At
The Maricopa County Jail Have Been Given Permission To Strip Down To
Their Government-Issued Pink Boxer Shorts. On Wednesday, hundreds of
men wearing boxers were either curled up on their bunk beds or chatted
in the tents, which reached 138 Degrees InsideThe Week Before.
Many Were Also Swathed In Wet, Pink Towels As Sweat Collected On
Their Chests And Dripped Down To Their PINK SOCKS. ‘It Feels Like We Are In A Furnace,’ Said James Zanzot, An Inmate Who Has Lived In The TENTS for 1 year. ‘It’s Inhumane.’
Joe Arpaio, is not one bit sympathetic. He said Wednesday that he told all of the
inmates: ‘It’s 120 Degrees In Iraq And Our Soldiers Are Living In Tents
Too, And They Have To Wear Full Battle Gear, But They Didn’t Commit Any Crimes,
So Shut Your Mouths!’
You always hear the usual stories of pennies on the sidewalk being good luck, gifts from angels, etc. This is the first time I’ve ever heard this twist on the story. Gives you something to think about. Several years ago, a friend of mine and her husband were invited to spend the weekend at the husband’s employer’s home. My friend, Arlene, was nervous about the weekend.. The boss was very wealthy, with a fine home on the waterway, and cars costing more than her house. The first day and evening went well, and Arlene was delighted to have this rare glimpse into how the very wealthy live. The husband’s employer was quite generous as a host, and took them to the finest restaurants. Arlene knew she would never have the opportunity to indulge in this kind of extravagance again, so she was enjoying herself immensely. As the three of them were about to enter an exclusive restaurant that evening, the boss was walking slightly ahead of Arlene and her husband. He stopped suddenly, looking down on the pavement for a long, silent moment. Arlene wondered if she was supposed to pass him. There was nothing on the ground except a single darkened penny that someone had dropped, and a few cigarette butts Still silent, the man reached down and picked up the penny. He held it up and smiled, then put it in his pocket as if he had found a great treasure. How absurd! What need did this man have for a single penny? Why would he even take the time to stop and pick it up? Throughout dinner, the entire scene nagged at her. Finally, she could stand it no longer. She casually mentioned that her daughter once had a coin collection, and asked if the penny he had found had been of some value. A smile crept across the man’s face as he reached into his pocket for the penny and held it out for her to see. She had seen many pennies before! What was the point of this? ‘Look at it.’ He said. ‘Read w hat it says.’ She read the words ‘ United States of America ‘ ‘No, not that; read further.’ ‘One cent?’ ‘No, keep reading.’ ‘In God we Trust?’ ‘Yes!’ ‘And?’ ‘And if I trust in God, the name of God is holy, even on a coin.. Whenever I find a coin I see that inscription. It is written on every single United States coin, but we never seem to notice it! God drops a message right in front of me telling me to trust Him? Who am I to pass it by? When I see a coin, I pray, I stop to see if my trust IS in God at that moment. I pick the coin up as a response to God; that I do trust in Him.. For a short time, at least, I cherish it as if it were gold. I think it is God’s way of starting a conversation with me.
Lucky for me , God is patient and pennies are plentiful!
A biker is passing the zoo, when he sees a little girl leaning into the lion’s cage. Suddenly, the lion grabs her by the cuff of her jacket and tries to pull her inside to slaughter her, under the eyes of her screaming parents.
The biker jumps off his bike, runs to the cage and hits the lion square on the nose with a powerful punch.Whimpering from the pain the lion jumps back, letting go of the girl, and the biker brings her to her terrified parents, who thank him endlessly.
A New York Times reporter has watched the whole event.
The reporter says, ‘Sir, this was the most gallant and brave thing I saw a man do in my whole life.’
The biker replies, ‘Why, it was nothing really, the lion was behind bars. I just saw this little kid in danger, and acted as I felt right.’
The reporter says, ‘Well, I’m a journalist from the New York Times, and tomorrow’s paper will have this story on the front page…So, what do you do for a living and what political affiliation do you have?
The biker replies, ‘I’m a U.S. Marine and a Republican.’
The following morning the biker buys The New York Times to see if it indeed brings news of his actions and reads, on the front page:
U. S. MARINE ASSAULTS AFRICAN IMMIGRANT AND STEALS HIS LUNCH
A well-known speaker started off his seminar by: holding up a $20.00 bill.. In the room of 200, he asked, ‘ Who would like this $20 bill? ‘ Hands started going up. He said, ‘ I am going to give this $20 to one of you but first, let me do this. He proceeded to crumple up the $20 dollar bill. He then asked, ‘ Who still wants it? ‘ Still the hands were up in the air. Well, he replied, ‘ What if I do this? ‘ And he dropped it on the ground and started to grind it into the floor with his shoe. He picked it up, now crumpled and dirty. ‘ Now, who still wants it? ‘ Still the hands went into the air. My friends, we have all learned a very valuable lesson. No matter what I did to the money, you still wanted it because it did not decrease in value. It was still worth $20. Many times in our lives, we are dropped, crumpled, and ground into the dirt by the decisions we make and the circumstances that come our way. We feel as though we are worthless. But no matter what has happened or what will happen, you will never lose your value. Dirty or clean, crumpled or finely creased, you are still priceless to those who DO LOVE you. The worth of our lives comes not in what we do or who we know, but by WHO WE ARE and WHOSE WE ARE. You are special Don ‘ t EVER forget it ‘ Count your blessings, not your problems… ‘
And remember: amateurs built the ark .. professionals built the Titanic.
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