Mr. Yin and Mr. Yang at My Gym
Mr. Yin is a sporadic gym goer.
He comes to the gym dressed in a gray sweatshirt tucked into thick gray sweatpants, the bottoms of which are tucked into workboots.
He sweats his ass off on the machines.
He carries a gallon jug of water to replenish all that sweats out of him.
He has a big fat belly and days old scruff on his face.
The bottom of his big fat belly sticks out when his sweatshirt comes untucked while doing pullups.
He has been coming to the gym as far back as I can remember and hasn’t changed a bit.
Mr. Yang is perfect.
He wears a perfectly fit designer tank top with matching thin sweatpants and straps that stay around his wrists at all times.
He has a perfect haircut and perfect skin.
He walks purposefully to each machine, or piece of equipment with perfect posture.
I watch what he does because his lifting technique is impeccable.
Whatever move he does, he lifts slowly, squeezes at the top, and slowly lowers the weight.
He has a great looking physique.
And he’s on the side of nerdy.
Two more characters at my gym.
Weight Training: Back, shoulders, calves
Cardio: 500
Breakfast: oatmeal
banana
coffee w/ milk
Lunch: Steamed shrimp and vegetables
rice
Dinner: Chicken
pasta
January 15, 2009 at 6:43 am
they should start a new reality show at your gym.
January 15, 2009 at 6:49 am
Shannon, you could be the Simon Cowell of "The Gym Idol" show.
January 15, 2009 at 6:51 am
Everyone has characters at their gym. You just have to know how to pick them out.
January 15, 2009 at 6:54 am
I’m glad you’re not at my gym. Don’t want to think what sort of geek you’d think I am.
January 15, 2009 at 6:57 am
Just don’t wear sweatpants tucked into workboots and you’ll be golden in my book.
January 15, 2009 at 7:02 am
Roger that. Hey, one peeve observation I have is seeing the plumber look. Guys who are overweight, & blessing the rest of us with the site of their butt crack. Hard to believe how clueless some guys are.
At it’s a motivator to not let myself get out of shape again like that.
January 15, 2009 at 7:31 am
And Under Armor makes a ton of money on middle aged fat guys in Houston, TX. If your stomach isn’t flat don’t put it on. That’s all I’m saying. I was at the Under Armor outlet by my house and put one of those compression shirts on, I almost cried. Damn I’m such a girl.
January 15, 2009 at 7:31 am
Hey… Be nice to the guys on this side of nerdy…
January 15, 2009 at 7:45 am
I’ve got nothing against nerdy tendencies.
January 15, 2009 at 11:00 am
There is a guy at my gym that I call "workout khaki’s" he wears brown khaki’s at the gym.. seriously how comfortable is that??? They are extra starched too
January 15, 2009 at 11:15 am
Ok, we have the "Train Wreck" and Ms Constant Cold who are the 2 newest in our gym.
The Train Wreck is a guy that breaths like he is in lamaze class for 30 freaking minutes. Loud enough that you can hear him through your headphones.
Ms Constant Cold is clearing her throat every 30 seconds for 30 freaking minutes while on the treadmill. It’s worse than Chineese Water torture.
January 15, 2009 at 3:50 pm
Loud breathing and clearing throats (as well as sniffling) annoy me to no end. Does the guy have 1/2 a lung or something?
January 15, 2009 at 8:01 pm
Dont workout next to me then, cause when I workout my nose starts to get stuffed. And it annoys ME. I have to blow my nose every other set at some points.
Theres this one dude that wears the exact same jersey every time he comes into the gym. Im just HOPING that he loves the name on the back so much that he has 4 or 5 of those and wears a different one each time he goes.
I have 5 white shirts, and 5 different colored shorts and 5 same designed bandannas, so Im good for 5 gym sessions. If I decide to go for a 6th day on the same week, im f-ed. haha.
January 16, 2009 at 12:46 am
Shan no gym on this planet has anywhere near the characters that your gym does.