Shannon’s BodyBlog

Everything has finally bloomed…or is on it’s way to blooming.  That means my mood has bloomed too.  Plus, with the warmer weather, my clothing allows more skin to show.  So, I’m more motivated to keep up my workouts so that the results are apparent and progress shows.

It’s difficult to stay on the elliptical for an hour (my goal) because the bottoms of my feet get numb.  I guess it’s from keeping them in one place without really moving them around like I would on a treadmill.

So, it’s time to get outside and exercise.  There is a great 4 mile loop "around the block" that I can walk which is mostly uphill (good ol’, hilly New England).  And then toward the end, there is a 50 degree, 1 mile hill that really kicks my ass.  I love it.  I get it done in an hour, and I will push to get it done in under an hour…and will try to beat my time each week.  That is a great motivator.

I’m still on the same weight lifting routine.  I’ll switch it up in a few weeks.  Right now, the only changes I’m making to the routine is to just add weight.

My camera is busted, so by the time I see a visible difference in my body, the camera will either be fixed…or we will have bought a new one.

I need to drink more water…period.  I’ve cut out the diet soda, regular soda, I just finished up the last of the Crystal Light I had been making for myself.  Now it’s all down to just water and skim milk.  I use skim for meals like making my oatmeal and my protein drinks (I use half water half skim).  But from now on, the majority of my fluid intake has got to be water.

I retain water like crazy in general and my face is currently breaking out.  I know it’s caused by "that time of the month" and lack of water intake.  I totally understand that my body is holding whatever water it can because I’m not giving it enough.  And my complexion will be much improved when it’s quenched.
The water retention really affects my energy levels.  I feel sluggish and sleepy.

It’s crazy how I don’t give my body what it needs.  For what reason?  No good reason that I can think of.

Water is the easiest thing you can give your body.  It’s plentiful, it’s cheap!, you don’t have to cook it, if you want to make it taste better just add a splash of lime juice.  It’s very low maintenance.

I can’t believe I was loading my body with toxic crap like diet sodas.  I guess I’ve had a lack of respect for myself.

I’m changing my entire point of view toward myself now.  My body is my temple….

I found Chickentuna’s website and it was just the reality check I needed.  I was always trying to find the most convenient way/time to work out and to eat what I wanted without the hard sacrifice.

Basically, my body shows the amount of work I put into it, and my body isn’t so hot.  It looks great in clothes, but that doesn’t reflect my health.  Anyone can look good in clothes, but have the health of a homeless person.

CT’s site gave me the reality check I needed.  And that is that.  It’s time to STFU and do the work it takes to achieve the health and physique I want.

I’ve got tunnel vision now.  All I want to see is the body I want.  I’m putting the blinders on to the junk food and the laziness.

Excuse me while I go and work out.

I want to lose the padding and be consistent with my strength routine.  I WANT.  But it isn’t clicking yet.

I remember back when I was losing the baby weight after my first son was born.  It came so easy.  I was losing 2 pounds per week, eating clean, avoiding anything outrageously bad.  If I wanted something like cookies or ice cream, I’d have one serving size and limit those kinds to treats to only once or twice a week.  On the weekends, I basically ate whatever I wanted, but I limited my portion sizes so it wasn’t so out of control.

I wish I could get back into a groove like that again.  I feel so frazzled and confused about everything.  There’s a lot more to keep track of nowadays, my eating habits aren’t as regimented as they were when I was working full time.  Actually, I have no habits to speak of which I think is my biggest obstacle.

Since I stay at home, I can shower when I want, get dress however I want.  Unless I have appointments and aside from getting the kids to school, my schedule is whatever I want it to be.

I have no structure and too much freedom.  I’m trying to get a grip on structuring my time as though I have a job to get to.  I need to wake up earlier than I do, shower and get myself together before the kids need me….the way I used to when I worked full-time.

You’d think after 6 years of staying at home, I’d have my shit together.

Nope.  I let myself become too loose about things.  I think it’s because all of my life I was completely  regimented, strict about my time management, scheduled up the wazoo.

Once I started staying home, my time was my own and I loved that.  The pressure was off…I made up my own responsibilities, I had no one to answer to but me, I didn’t have clients and co-workers demanding anything of me anymore.

So, now in order to take care of me, I need to get back to being more strict with how I spend my time.

I wish it would click.  I need that click.

This morning I was woken by both of my sons as they crawled into bed with me after my husband left for work.  It was around 5 a.m.

I had planned to work out early and knew that if I got up, they’d come along with me.  Ordinarily, I’d give up my plans to avoid any kind of chaos or difficulty that comes with them interfering with my workout, but I decided to get up anyway and follow through with my plan.

They of course got up with me, but decided to watch TV in my room…so Yay for me!!

I had about 10 minutes left to my cardio session when my 4 yr old was screaming down to me that my oldest wouldn’t let him watch his shows.

I turned up my iPod, yelled to him that I’d be up in 10 minutes and kept chugging along.  He kept carrying on and I was getting annoyed, but I knew if I stopped to deal with the fight, I’d be giving up my committment yet again and didn’t want to get into a stop/start situation with my goals.  No progress can ever be made with that kind of schedule.  So I finished out my session and by that time, he had stopped crying.  I of course had an uphill battle dealing with the TV fight afterward, but at least I finished the goal I set for myself.

On to tomorrow……

I don’t know why everything is such a struggle for me.  I used to be so on top of things pre-marriage/kids.  I thought nothing of working out at the same time each day….eating what was good for me.

But nowadays I’m always searching for just the right way to go about things.  I guess I’m trying to find what’s easiest and in turn, it makes things more complicated and frustrating for me.

The big thing now is when to work out.  I prefer during the day, but then I always feel like I have something hanging over my head and I put it off to get other things done.  So too often I wind up not doing my workouts at all.

My best bet is to wake up earlier than normal and get my workouts over with then.  I think it’ll make my life easier too because I’ll be satisfied that I’ve accomplished a major goal for the day and I won’t have an excuse to skip it.

My next adjustment comes with food.  I must eat clean at all times.  Not only do I feel my best when I do, but when I stray I wind up retaining water and it makes me feel sluggish and plain old fat.

I need to just stick to those simple things.  Stay on course.  Make it a habit.