Are you setting yourself up for failure?
Thats the question you have to ask yourself. See, I am going to try and tie in fitness to this romance blog (as it is a bodyblog). Why are you getting into shape? Is it for youself, or that significant other, or the spouse, or future spouse, etc? Or maybe, its the combination of several reasons. I’m not gonna lie. It feels great being thin and looking good. It does increase confidence. So, I started thinking about it, and the question is: How picky are you? Are you setting youself up for failure? I had an older hair sylist, who always said he "only" dated blondes. And I always laugh whenever I hear these things. I mean its great to have a type youre really attracted to. But, if you are "only" going to date blondes, or brunettes or people who are only Irish, or polish, or Italian, or anything. I guarantee you will be alone. He used to say " I just dont find brunettes sexual enough." (needless to say, he tried to get me to go blonde). Ok, whatever. Hes entitled to his beliefs. Blondes, brunettes, redheads, etc. What makes a person hot and sexy is their mentality, their belief system, their intelligence, the way they carry themselves!!!!!!!!! To TRULY love, you have to move beyond these small insignificant things. Its not love at all. And if its not love, its not true love. I think Its important to have traits we typically want in a partner. However, having a checklist- whether it be having a sick pack, or a doctorate, or brown hair, or what they do for a living, or that they are rich, etc, is gonna make things harder. And ya know what? There is a lot of immorality in society, but opening up- and seeing the best within each person (even a potential mate), is not adding to the problem. Have likes. Thats important. Its great to find things generally attractive in people, but be open. There is a great movie out (if you havent seen it) called the Secret. Its basically having the right mentality, and truly believing and concentrating on what you want (by visualizing it). Then, you will sucessfully manifest your life the way you want it. I can preach it for me, because its working. I have many true believers in my unlimited all around potential!! Whether its by visualizing happiness, health (like getting great abs), increased faith or spirituality, my education, –its all been coming into my life. I have embraced it, and visualized it. Sometimes the question has to be asked from a different angle. In other words, its not the fact a person likes blondes. Rather, in the LONG RUN, is being brunette that big of a turn off in "love?" No, not really, not even for procreation purposes. The secet will tell you- you can have a checklist. Place your order with the universe, not matter how exact it is. So, I will say the same. However, I want to end with two notes. First, sitting around and doing nothing, and expecting it to manifest in your life will not work. Truly believe, be optimistic, have confidence. You have to act!! Second, you can put anything precise on a checklist (and might get it if you truly believe and act on it) but in the long run some things- like hair color, dont matter. Go for- if they come from a good family, if they have faith, if they are sweet, if they make a difference in society etc. Put your energy on this. These things matter. The question for you is: Are you visualizing it with health too? And since love is so important in this life, are you setting yourself up for failure?
May 1, 2007 at 8:47 am
Interesting. I like your mindset and positive energy! Romance is good too.
Good luck with your goals!
May 1, 2007 at 8:19 pm
Last year I was (almost) blonde, this year a brunette w/red highlights. Both colors were fun (I am a natural brunette). The color of the hair can influence your personality, but it is how comfortable you feel inside your own skin that can bring you the most joy.
May 3, 2007 at 5:52 pm
Great blog Nicole! I am naturally attracted to brown eyes, but the person I thought would be in my life forever had green eyes. In the end, it was the heart and soul I fell for. All that surface stuff is just surface. I want someone in my life who accepts me 100% and lets me accept them equally. As for my reason for getting in shape…strictly for me.
May 22, 2007 at 3:11 pm
Great blog insightful. I completely agree with the need to accept people for who they are and not what you expect of them or would like them to be. In todays society it is so easy to sweat the small stuff and/or dwell on the insignificant idiosyncrasies in others that we don’t like. The challenge is to find the good in everything and everyone. It is there, barring random evil people. Life isn’t good or bad..its both and neither..if that makes sense??? Life is also too short and I’d rather spend it smiling. Plus the differences make it all so interesting don’t they?