THOUGHTS OF A FITNESS FREAK

I felt a little aimless.  I intended to do back and bi’s, but then I get there and do a few back exercises and let me just say……I think my back is fine, so I slacked off on it.  Maybe a couple sets and heavy and thats it  on

bent over rows 105 lbs

seated rows 130

lat pull downs 110 (these are funny because when I stop, they lift me right off the seat.Im like wheeeeeeee!!!!)

35 lb db rows

lat press downs 110 lbs

single arm rows 110 each arm

seated presses for shoulders……I was bored, like doing shoulders

for bis I just did db curls at 30 lbs.  They got worked a little with the over head rows though.  No biggie, they are looking decent sized anyway.  I did some calves

seated 140 plus the sled weight (what is that anyway?)   then  donkey 400 lbs as usual.  Im thinking of slapping a 45 on top of it.  I can get 15 easy at 400 lbs, just not sure my weak ankle wants more.

I did some abs, sits inclined with a 25 lb plate, kneeling cable crunches up to 160 because I did the whole stack easy so I pinned up another 10 lb plate and hanging leg raises.

Thats it.  I lost track of time really.  I may have been there a couple hours.  I only left because someone said something to me that really bothered me, so I did not check the time. Im just at a loss how people can be mean to me without knowing me. I never hurt anyone and am always smiling….why do people have to be cruel? Does it make them feel better?  Do you go about the rest of your day with self happiness like "yeah, I crushed that little mom at the gym today, that makes me a great and superior being".? Maybe they do…….  

I ate 3 and 1/2 at lunch….then ate one later that night.  Last night I mean.  The ladies at work were impressed.  I didnt train, went to see my daughters boyfriend play guitar, had a couple shots and then another burger on the way home.  Seriously, once in awhile you have to "junk up" and get it out of your system.  It wont kill you and the carbs and fats…..well, you should have seen my arms.  I looked jacked and vascular yesterday and today nice and full.  I will go back to my lean turkey burgers with no bread today.

Oh and the mitrotropin is working.  I have an obvious 6 back without harsh dieting or adding in cardio.  I dropped to 126 the other night, but after the burgers probably am more like 129!!!  I will post some progress pics as far as the Mitotropin goes.  Stay tuned

Thanks for the dating comments.  yes, you want someone fit but you dont want to crap on sacred ground!

We finally did some figure posing tonight.  I met Nina, a past gymnastic…..totally cool.  She has the biggest back and delts, but nice and round.  Totally different bodytype than me at 5′1" and me at 5′3" and 1/2.  I swear i got legs like a freakin gazelle somehow being a shortie.  I swear mine are about 6 inches longer than women my height in competition.  It makes building harder.  She is going to do great.,   We went over new posing rules and a more relaxed look.   Shoulders are more "relaxed" and pushed back, no longer pushing out the booty ladies.  I kind of have a hard time with my old habits though and being in 5 inch heels gave me a major calf cramp.  She did well.  One tip here..she may have some scoliosis because her left shoulder was lower than the right.  Here is the tip if you notice this on yourself like I did.  Do your posing and close your eyes, when you know your shoulder height is even, touch the tips of your fingers to your leg.  You will then know how high your hands have to be to make your shoulders even.  Obviously my left hand is higher on my leg.  You can see it in my pics sometimes, looks like I have one arm longer, but I try to hide it.   

I also have a more jacked looking body with my veins and leanessness even at 128lbs.  This worries me.  How am I supposed to drop weight to compete against these women who weight 105 when I am looking pretty lean right now, but still do not have the volume I am seeking?  It makes me nuts.  The damn numbers game! I guess I keep telling myself to just try to be most memorable on stage……winning doesnt always take you places.  Enjoy the ride, all that good stuff.  Seriously, so many great things have happened in the past couple years for me.  If you knew the timid quiet mouse I used to be, you would know this.   My sister used to introduce me as "this is my sister, th quiet one.  She doesnt talk"  then I might say hi and look at the floor or away.  I felt like a loser really.

So we did our quarter turns and I am happy to say I didnt shake and held my poses well.  New girls dont know how hard this is to get used to.  Sometimes on stage its like time is standing still and they take forever to judge!  You are thinking, "please make me turn, please make me turn!!!!" and you are screaming in your head and your back is achine and your toes are ready to blister in your shoe…but smile and look pretty……always smile.  smile smmmmmmmiiiiiiiii              ullllllllllllllllllllll…………………

So why do it?  Because we can.  Because the prom queen or the fairy tale princess lives in all us women.  Admit it.  Even with my gym feet, my broken nails, my blister/burn from my woodstove on my hand and the one on my forearm and my popping veins……Im still a girly girl inside.  I cry at stupid movies, I love wildflowers and babies and music boxes and pink and even a phone call that says I miss you and then hangs up. 

Any questions about figure, hit me up.  I dont know it all………but will help if I do!

I did it once and will never do it again.  Sure, lots of people there look good and some are into fitness like you are, but most relationships end for one reason or another…………the end result can be disasterous.  The relationship is kind of public, the gym gets gossipy of course and the breakup is probably more public than you want it to be.  Plus you have to factor it in (like a divorce) who gets to go to the gym when so you wont run into each other.  Yeah, it was MY gym first…..he stopped going there despite the fact he said he was going to.  It was a long time ago and I have moved on, but I have learned my lesson. 

For me the gym was a feel good place and after a break up a "feel bad" place.  I go there to get away, not be reminded of crap.  Yes, still got some good looking men there.  I just pretend they are all married and chat a little but thats it.  if I want to be cranky someplace i will just go to work! 

Many of us women Im sure have been targets of gym gossip.  I have been going to mine for 3 years and have had a problem with someone saying really terrible things about me, but I just went on smiling and it went away.  I refused to get chased out due to cheap lies from someone I didnt even know who didnt even know me.  My actions speak for themselves, you know? 

Im going to go do chest and tris I think.  we are expecting a messy snowstorm, so got to get in a workout.  I was supposed to dothe figure posing, but we changed it to tomorrow night.  Hope the weather is clear by then. NewEngland really sucks this winter.

Fern

My friend Doug asked me to help a figure newbie to train with her posing.  The biggest part is probably nerves, they tend to make you forget how to relax and turn.  my biggest problem, but probably knowing my own flaws will help me help this girl.  Im going to bring my video camera to see if she will let me tape it.  I’d love to prep her!  Tanning, all that good crap.  Now, he says she is pretty muscular, this may be good or bad…..its FIGURE.  So if a bunch of bikini chicks show up and cross into figure and she stands out too much it could hurt her.  All depends on the judges. Posing has also changed and I need to practice myself.  No more looking flexed and tensed, no more pushedout glutes.  Its going to be rough as I have kind of formed habits.  She has it easier being new!  I will let you know how it goes.  Seriously, hope I can go to her show, maybe throw myself in as it is not until May..the jay cutler classic in boston I think.  Not like we will be competing as I would do only masters.  Doing too many classes is tough and last time I had a bloody toe from my shoes from being on stage too much.

Dud back aND bis tonight and a little shoulders.  I am proud that I can do 2 45’s and 4 10’s on my bent over rows now.  6 reps!!  For bi’s we did curls on the low pully’s with the bar and drop setted.  we did delt flies, bent ober db rows, barbell curls,urright smith rows, press downs, seate rows (I exceeeded my max and hit 130 today) .  Honestly, it was kind of a whirlwind visit because I had 2 scoops of superpump and everyone wanted to chat tonight. Its ok, its fun.  Life is always better when I can joke around  little bit.  I think I need more carbs even though I got a decent pump, felt it could have been better.  I believe my only carbs were a coffeee cup of oatmeal.  What I need is some giant bowl of pasta!  Oh, here is a great meal

whole wheat pasta

add broccoli, but just to warming (frozen kind) nice and aldente’

garlic powder and I cant believe its not butter spray.

You can also put in some chicken or shrimp……sometimes I throw in stewed tomatoes.  Its fast, its clean…….yummy.

You can keep cooked pasta for days and the whole wheat doesnt get mushy when you reheat it. I do the same with my rice and my ground turkey.  Mix your stuff with seasoning, light on the salt though.  You cant be "leftover shy" when going lean.  Too wasteful.

Ok, gotta run.  I posted my geeky interview on my page.  Its a whole minute long…….grueling

Finally, blasting them about 3x a week, legs 2x a week..results are coming. Yes, this is my 2nd blog of the day, but I was very happy with my leg day. Those things around my ankles are my harbinger straps for glute work.  I had a "lesser" brand and I broke them doing 70 lbs or something. Thus far, no Harbinger product has dissapointed me. I have the ladies gloves with the wrist straps as well, padded palms.awesome.  Just cus I lift "like a man" doesnt mean I have to have hands like one.

I did alot of dropsets today, all legs, including calves. Hit almost everything known to man really in the way of exercises. I was in a super great mood because my TV interview was on and I wasnt a total idiot.  I moved around alot and I was really nervous which makes my accent come out, plus I had to talk loud and thats hard for me cus I have never been one of those loud chicks. I was hoping I wouldnt say something that would make me sound like a total dipshit. 

Back to legs.  Smith squats at just 105 but went deep, same old leg extensions.  I tried to start at 125 but my knee said "no way Jose’" so I decided 110 was enough and dropsetted from there.  I went back 3 times with several things.  Some people may think thats too much, but I still consider myself in the "growing phase" when it comes to legs, so I train them like this.  My upper body, not so much anymore.  I was able to ease up on most of those.  For some reason I had a fantastic leg pump.  This doesnt happen often.  maybe a little tightness, but today was great.  Fine, it makes me walk a little funny..but who cares?  Me and my friend Eric were talking the other night about the butt pump.  After a great workout, you can go a couple days being really aware how tight your butt is, funny but true. Its very self satisfying.

Ok, I wrote enough.  Im starving.gotta feed my face

Im tryingto figure this one out. Im doing figure in April, still dont feel I am ready for bodybuilding.  I just don’t know when I want to start. Some women start 16 weeks out, but I am probably 10% bodyfat and weigh 129.  I competed at 119 I think and didnt deplete at all.  If I deplete I will lose 5lbs in just a few days time……thats easy. Right now I am still trying to get to 135 and seem to be running out of time. Should I get ripped anyway as there is no more "flexed" posing in figure? Will the stage lights make me look too ripped?  Will I lose my delts again?   Everyone likes being ripped, but obviously it isnt healthy to stay that way all the time. Besides that, you don’t grow when you are too lean. You can’t lift heavy either and your energy level is low.  Im thinking 8 weeks will be plenty to start with and yes, I think I will do regular cardio this time.  My nemesis the stepmill will be calling my name.

Oh and I finally got some beef to eat.  Beef is the best for muscle building!  My honey sent me "meat money" this week. He is a bodybuilder and knows how important it is to eat right, so once in awhile he sends me some cashola to buy meat and meat only. He lives 3,000 miles from me but is my biggest supporter in everything I do. He is coming to visit in a week and Im super excited because I have not seen him since August. I will try to get him to take some pics with me, see if you can figure out who he is….hahaaaaa! Who says you cant find someone great on the internet? Long distance relationships can be hard, but if someone is supporting you mentally it does work out.  2 years of talking on the phone and you learn alot about someone.  I will be honest and tell you that men don’t like me working out much.  I had a couple boyfriends after I started going to the gym and always had to hear "who do you talk to there?" Why do you go so much?" "Are you going to get all big and buff and be MsFitness or something?"   That was another defining moment about 3 years ago.  the MsFitness comment……..screw you Scott. I AM MSFITNESS….how ya like me now?? Ya cranky bastard?  I get tired of people who write to me telling me their boyfriend or girlfriend or spouse doesnt like them working out or berates them for it.  So, one day you will wake up out of shape to find they left you for someone younger who is in better shape?  Get outta here with your insecurities already.  I’d love to walk around with a guy everyone was checking out or even hitting on.  All you have to do is say, "yep, he’s/she’s mine and he’s/she’s coming home with me"…..hahaaaaaaa !!! They should take it as a compliment…..and trust you.   I don’t understand why someone would want to make another person unhappy and insecure.  I want a happy, healthy partner, not some miserable person making me feel like I am always wrong and ugly and stupid.  I had that, I left that and I know some people are going through the same thing and it saddens me. The way I am now…..I laugh, I get silly, I talk to everyone…….Im freakin happy, even with tons of bills and bad credit.    So ladies and gents, do it if it makes you happy.  Im going to go do legs for 2  until I want to cry, no one will tell me when to come home, I workout too much, or complain about my ’short’ shorts. Can you say the same?

Everything in life is about timing.  Yes, I have 4 kids, but in all fairness my youngest is now 8.  So don’t be so hard on yourself if you can’t dedicate as much time as I do.  I did go through my mommy slob period, trust me.  Besides that, you don’t have to be as muscular as me, so it won’t take you as long as it did me.  Just know that you can look like the way you used to after kids, probably better actually. I get asked alot about skin and I mention it from time to time………its genetic, the elasticity that is.  I have seen plastic surgery on TV of women who could never fix it in a gym. 

My internet was messed up, so I am lacking in my blogs.  Tonight I trained with Eric…he’s 25.  Major potential, but ‘boxed in’ with his training. So tonight I assesed him.  Middle back and lats need work, great arms and delts though.  We did some back and bi’s.  I taught him some of my lat work and he was really feeling the burn.  Im a little obsessive, but it has worked for me. I have learned what machine or what move works every muscle on my body.  I dont care how tiny the area is……Im into my fitness bigtime obviously.

Here is my back and bis for tonight.

Bent over smith rows 105, lat press downs with short bar 130, overhead rows on the hammerstrength 70 each arm, single arm pulldowns 120.  Bi’s I did 35 lb db curls, cable curls 55 lbs each arm and drop set there, machine curls 95 lbs I think and hammer curls with the rope at 110. 

I didnt do alot, but did heavy weights.  I skipped alot of exercises because I went heavy and it takes more time, plus I was chatting……I admit it. Its friday night and I was bored so I stayed about 3 hours.

I wanted to share a little thing about what made me change my life.  It was a song………one song that made me think, that made me want to change because we never know how much time we have and I didnt want to go to sleep at 38 and wake up 70 wondering what happened to my life and why I was unhappy the entire time.  I will post it here.  MAYBE IT WILL MAKE YOU THINK TOO.

I often get asked if I had to choose one supplement, what would it be?  thats is sooooooooo easy!  Its Superpump250 from Gaspari Nutrition.  I just turned yet another person from my gym on to it.  He was like "Holy crap, my arms were going to explode"!!!  You get the pump, you get the veins if you want them, you maintain/get leaner WHILE building muscle.  Its quite to well rounded supplement.  Not to mention the energy that most of us need to get through another workout after working at our day jobs. 

I will be back later to change some of my stats.  I was doing the math and know I have gained about 12-13 lbs since the last Arnold (2008)and I am  guessing 8-10 is all muscle gains.  Not so shabby if I do say so myself!  My bulk is probably a little different than the average bulking phase though because I refuse to get "chubby" to make more gains, so I have to still eat relatively clean. Im not beyond a cheeseburger though, trust me. 

Talk to you later,

Fern

This was a really fun series.  I am getting the disk because there are alot more in it, so I will be able to share something besides these few in awhile, but I am happy with these.  I get tired of the bikini pics.  Lots of times they just don’t represent "feelings". 

I didnt train tonight, I felt a hairwashing and a nap were more important.  I dont sleep until late and it catches up with me.  It has snowed alot, not too much sun, so this probably has had an effect on me as well. many of us in Ct and in the northeast have SAD (seasonal affective disorder) and lose energy in the winter due to lack of vitamin D.  I take vit D, but frankly it isnt absorbed all that great as with sunlight.  I may jump in the tanning bed once in awhile to help me get through the winter though. 

Im not terribly sore from killing legs yesterday………kind of dissapointed.  We did alot for cripe sake. Any more and my knees would break out of the skin. Guess I will keep plodding away…….got to tell myself to just keep trying. 

I have a few more pics on my myspace and the link is on my profile if you want to check them out.  Thanks again to everyone who has supported me in the past.  It really means alot and bodyspace is certainly a factor in everything I have accomplished in the last 2 years. Im broke in dollars, but rich in friends and experiences!