THOUGHTS OF A FITNESS FREAK

I am finally packed.  I am a huge procrastinator and over-packer.  I think it may be because I never really traveled much, so I don’t know what I am going to use and what I am not.

All day yesterday I was having major anxiety about this trip.  Its not even the flying, its going out of my comfort zone I think. I just felt like I feel right before I step on stage.  I get there around 430pm, and then go to the hotel and then get ready to go meet Marzia at a gym to film our video.  I just got an email thats it is instructional and possibly about correct form in the gym. She is a personal trainer and I have learned from many screw ups, so it should be interesting to say the least. I do have my ISSA books, but have no time to study.  I attend the school of hard knocks…heheee.  Hurt yourself in the gym and say, "damn, I AM and idiot" and don’t do it again.

I have my video camera and my regular camera with me.  I want to share as much as possible for those of you who cannot attend. It will also be podcast live(I believe) all weekend, so check the main page.

I will seriously miss all of you.  My inbox may be full, but you can always write to me at my gaspari address on my page here.  they are giving me my own page and column called "ask MsFitness" on their site, so you will be able to reach me there too.

I’m stepping outside the box.  Me, yes, little old me. I will try to represent the moms and the women over 35 who are programmed to look a certain way and dress a certain way.  Don’t suppress yourself for anyone! Get out there and be what you want to be, no matter your age or if you have kids. A huge portion of society is over 30.  There are no rules that state we have to stop living , that our lives are over after 30 and you can only look great in your 20’s.  People live to be 90 or more….who wants to look like crap for 60 years? Not Moi!

Take care, I will miss you guys terribly!  I have no laptop to keep in touch.

Fern

This is my little girl

I was pressed for time because my pain in the rear daughter took forever to get ready.  Yes, she is going again. hopefully she will see some gains and stick with it this time. She did drop 5 lbs in the last couple weeks and yes, she does do cardio.  Just one mile a few times a week and she is cleaning up her diet. She is also convinced she is standing up straighter since beginning to work her back. She has expressed that she doesnt want to be as muscular as me and thats ok.  To each his own. I just don’t want her to be a hunchback because shes a little top heavy. She started at 123 lbs last week and is now 118 tonight.  This will fluctuate of course and I will try to get her to build her hips out a little and widen and strengthen the back as I said before.  I cant show you a picture of her from the rear because she would be horrified if she found out…haha!

BUT I will when I see improvements.  I am trying to get her to start a profile here. She is actually only a size 5 and is about 5′5″.  That sounds wonderful to most people, but it depends on how it’s put together. If you are all waist and no butt you probably feel the same.

As you can see my outfits finally arrived!  One problem, they are not suitable to wear with a bra…of course. I told Marzia my new nickname was going to be “nipolina” all weekend. Guess I gotta suck it up, be au naturale’ , love me hate me, kiss my ass if you don’t….ME……

One last pisser….I ordered 3 new bikinis for a photoshoot or 2…..they have not arrived.  That will be some money wasted now. See, this is why I share here, so you can know what sites are good and what sites BLOW as far as products and customer service.

Have a lovely evening 

Okay, I never truly stay down for long. Oh, I have my moments and they are pretty profound.  Blame it on hormones.  I was brutal with myself yesterday and my "ass-o-fire" has brought me to new levels of masochism. If you are in a fitness rut, do a night of weird crap that you have never done before and lemmee tell you…..ow freakin triple ow. There I was with a 45 in each hand (no, not the gun, this is not resident evil 4) doing romanian deadlifts , plates under my heals until I couldn’t do another set.  I was a woman possessed I think. Weird this is, I am singing to my MP3 the whole time and you get this rush like nobody’s business…..me likeeee. So, anywhoo, this is my escapism and we all need that once in awhile. It felt good to break out of my normal routine.  that gets so mundane.

Today was a crappy day, didn’t get much sleep and I had to go over accounts from my office. I suck at collections.  I can send you to collections, but I can’t call you and ask for money.  Total wuss here. I know that if you have a choice of paying for groceries or heat rather than your dental bill….the dental bill goes in the pile every month. We all know what that pile is…the "you can’t take anything away from me or shut anything off" pile. And PLEASE don’t tell me your dad died if I call.  What the heck am I supposed to say to that? Its a bummer job.

The strangest part of the day was that my dad got out of the hospital (good news) he did have a heart attack though. BUT my mom tells me he called about me and she sent him photos of me and he loved them and told her he was proud of me.  Ok, thats not the whole story. My father is a grouch and we had a falling out over a year ago and stopped speaking.  It was about his love of money more than his children really.  Anyway, he started calling me 2 weeks before his heart attack like nothing had ever happened between us.  So, the first time I see him in nearly 2 years, he is out light a light with a tube in his throat, gagging on it while they are trying to get blood from a collapsed vein..it was a horror to say the least. Sometimes life gives you a wake up call, you know.  My mother was in the hospital for 3 weeks in November, my aunt died and now my dad was in the hospital.  I suppose I have been a bit stressed to say the least. Now, I want to go around telling everyone I love them like a big dumb sap.

I haven’t packed for the Arnold yet.  I did pick up some memory cards for my camera and video camera. I am hoping to get alot of good stuff and maybe even get the balls to interview some people to post for those of you who cannot go. Lets see what happens..okay.  Told you, I am kind of shy, time to bust the last few crumbs of shyness loose seeing I am creeping up on 40…….

Talk to you later.  Sorry I did have a woprkout to post.  After yesterday, I needed a day off. 

I went to do legs today and my heart wasn’t in it. So, I dragged myself there and did it anyway.  I totally skipped the leg press, smith machine, etc.  Instead I focused on the more painful exercises.  Squats with a 45 lb plate in each hand and 2 plates under my feet, the same with deadlifts. 110 lb leg extensions and 70 lb curls.  I did my glutes on cables and my horizontal leg press with feet ducked out to the sides. I max repped each set until I got dizzy and cramped up.

Today I realized that no accomplishments mean anything if you have no one to share them with.  If you meet a new goal and get excited about it and have no one to call and tell, it just doesn’t feel the same. Everyone needs that, thats why we come here.  I no longer have someone to call and it really sucks.

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Last night I did new goals.  I chose my 40th birthday.  Stuff like calf size, thigh size and put in my ‘current ‘measurements.  Well, this morning I decided to check my calf size while in the bathroom because thats where my tape measure is and I suddenly have new growth! They are two different sizes, which pisses me off to no end, but the left is now 14 inches and the right 13.5.  Is that possible?  I measured a few weeks ago and it seems I have 1/2 an inch somehow.  I mean, I had laid off calves last season due to my ankle problem and was afraid to try again, so they obviously were lacking in comaparison to the rest of my body, but dang, 1/2 inch?  Oh, I am sooooooo motivated now.  I have been doing them 3 times a week or more and even when I am stamping mail at the machine at work, I am going on my toes to flex them.  I have been wearing high heeled boots every chance I get, etc.

I stayed home from the gym last night due to this snow/ice storm.  I was so freakin bored and sort of sit there like a caged leopard waiting to pounce on something. I was going to film some supersetting stuff because its a great way to maximize your time at the gym.  Most of us don’t have much free time, so if you only have an hour, it’s precious.  Plus Friday night the gym is almost empty and I don’t feel like an egotistical idiot filming myself.  Most of the time I am looking at my video thinking, "how can I weigh 128 lbs and still look like such a skinny turd?" I think I look bigger in person and it doesnt come across that way in video. 

I leave for the Arnold on Thursday!  Major anxiety about that !  The Olympia last year was my 1st solo journey and before that I had never stepped on a plane until I was 37 and went to Florida with an old boyfriend. Its not the plane ride I worry about though, it’s the whole whirlwind experience this trip is going to bring. I think I have 2 shoots to do so far, 1 with CSI photo and another with Herbiceps.com. I order suits which have yet to arrive so I have nothing to wear if they don’t come in.  I have to have my stupid nails done, find a way to get tan, whether it be spray or in a tube, waiting on my outfits from Gaspari, do something with my winter hair, etc.  I am such a low maintainence woman normally, so this is hard for me.  I never did master the art of fake lashes, remember when I tried last November? all I ended up doing was gluing my eyeball shut. I need girl help!!  I’m totally fine being a tomboy I suppose, but we all want to look pretty once in awhile.

Okay, time to get cracking.  I have to do chest and tris today.  I have to throw in some calves, lats and abs as well to make up for last night. I actually get guilt if I lose time.  I feel lazy and useless.

Hope everyone is warm!

LATEST WORD IS THAT "WOLF’ from the new american gladiators will be in the gaspari booth signing autographs. How cool is that?  I will be totally dwarfed as this dude is 6′4", 225. Try to find me as I am sure I will be able to stand behind him and be missed…hahaaaaaaa.  I hope he brings lots of kids to the booth because I love the looks on kids faces when they see someone who they think is a superhero.

I didnt train last night, but tonight will be better.  I was hoping to film a superset series so you can use it to max your workouts.  we’ll see what happens.  It is snowing like crazy here today, school is canceled, but I still have to work of course.  I love driving in the snow though. 

I was also going to talk about food, but I am late so I will catch up tonight. also, please note, if you comment to me and I don’t comment back, dont take offense.  I have a hard time seeing my comments and it locks up my pc and I can only see whats on my page.  If you need to talk to me, please pm me if you really want an answer.  I dont ever want anyone to think I am snubbing them.

Have a great day!!

Yes, this is what I was told less than one year ago by a promoter. Then I posted photos and was told, "your shoulders are not muscular enough" "you need to build up your quads", the list goes on and on.  Many of us here are working very hard to CHANGE and it’s a long journey sometimes. Someone stops on one of your photos and says your "bi shot" is a 4, your back is a "3", etc and you are thinking, "shit, that hurts", but you should be thinking, "just wait you miserable little turd" and go to the gym and bust nuts to post a better picture next time.  Being critiqued is very difficult! It can ruin your day or you can use it to motivate you to a higher level, your choice. So, this promoter is now someone I have met in person, who asked me to do his show this year. Things change…hehe. Its also a matter of perception an what others believe is beautiful or attractive. Some like bikini models, some like super muscles ladies and some like wee little ripped chicks who like to tear it up in the gym.  You can’t please everyone.

I got made fun of at work (I probably told you some of this before) for going to a gym, eating clean, for wanting to compete. I think my mother though I was going into a slutty beauty pageant after she saw my rhinestone hooker heels for the first time.  I took alot of shit from alot of people, but "I" loved it, so I kept going.  I walked around for the past 30 something years trying to make other people happy and got lost in the process.

I hear there is a forum post question "why is Msfitness is so popular?".  I didn’t go there and read it .I don’t know what people are saying and it will probably just piss me off and I will feel like crapola for a few days, so I stay away.  I would probably be inclined to call a few people out and have them meet me for a whole "repressed divorced single mom who spent 17 years driving minivans" type of ass whupping, but I will keep my mouth shut……..and think about monks and their peaceful lives…….zen and all that good stuff.

Oh, WORKOUTS…..tonight was forearms and calves. B-O-R-I-N-G………..

Behind the back wrist curls with a 40 (sounds like malt liquor, gimmee my 40 back woman)

barbell raises to shoulder level 40

bench barbell wrist curls 40

Hammercurls 20 (dumbbells)

seated calf raises with 2 45’s (wuss #’s, but I am easing my ankle into it)

140 nautilus calf slide machine

I used the smith to hold , set a block of wood (platform) under it and did single leg calf raises holding a 35lb plate on the side I was doing.  I am going to bring in my hooks for this next time.

phone call…gotta run

I fully understand the “need” for cardiovascular exercise.  What I do not understand is why people assume it can only be done on a treadmill, eliptical machine, cross trainer, etc. To me, this is a very narrow way of thinking.  I prefer instead to take my “cardio” into the weight room.  Why should I be stuck walking in one place for the utmost boring waste of friggin time on the planet other than watching paint dry? What the heck is there to do there?  Watch TV that you cant hear and doesnt have captions?  Read a magazine while your head bobs up and down and you feel motion sickness? try to take a sip of water and hope no one sees you just missed your lip and now have to pretend that it’s sweat because you slobbered on yourself?………….lets move on.

My 1st pass around the gym (I say pass because I open move in a pattern and hit up some things 2 or three times in one visit) I usually hit up light weights, fast paced, warm up.  then I move on to moderate or heavy and in between these sets, I can run over to another machine or exercise and superset until I am like a lathered racehorse.  I will do pull ups in between leg sets, some shoulders (lateral raises) hanging leg raises, bench dips.  Understand?  My heart IS pounding.  there is no 6 reps and rest for 3 minutes in my routine. If my arms are wasted, I go over and do some calves.  Why not?  This is how I “go lean”.  If you want to be the person who looks the same next year as you do this year, then keep on doing what you are doing such as cardio before a workout…this is proven to reduce your natural HGH levels, so your lifting is less productive.  If you insist on the cardio on the treadmill or bike.  Watch what you do and when you do it because you may just be sabotaging yourself. Some people LOVE cardio, thats fine and dandy…but I just don’t like it. I don’t really need it.  I suppose the whole diet, know your body thing takes time.  I can tell with a pinch of flesh here and there if I am flat, retaining water, tight or just plain carb depleted and saggy. I can drop 5 lbs in one week by mostly just cutting carbs and doing more cardio type workouts (usually more fully body burns several times a week)  I can tell without looking at a clock that 3 hours has gone by and I need to eat. Im not super strict with what I eat sometimes.  Knowing yourself is knowing when you CAN cheat and it wont make a damn bit of difference. Also, please note that super lean and ripped is not a healthy way to live all the time. You can have periods of leaness, maintain some leaness, but going up and down is normal.  Truly ripped is temporary and your internal organs need fat……..not to mention you would go around with a face like something from Dawn of the DEAD with hollow eye sockets and no lips…….heheeeeeee. 

Alright, I have to fly.  I will keep you posted on co ordinating the testers.  It is still in the works. Latta gata

Heads up ladies!  I recently asked the guys at Gaspari what they thought about getting a few figure competitiors into the tester mix and they came back with a possible competition between 2-3 ladies who were looking to compete against each other. This would entail before and after photos and some blogging in between in regards to products, diet and workouts.  I want to see your before white wintertime body or for the  ladies of color, who are far luckier than the pasty Irish whiteness I am cursed with! and then your (darker, dream tanned)tanned, suited up “physique”  Who’s game? As you are aware, the season is upon us and most shows begin in April.  I was hoping to get ladies who are doing the same show, but that may not be possible, so we will see what happens. I am not looking for terribly seasoned competitors, but someone who is new, 1st timer, only a couple shows, etc. No way I am going to put someone with huge experience up with someone with none.  But you have to want this……you have to want to win.  Yeah, many people here say you shouldnt compete to win, but damn, I want to win when I compete. I don’t want to be a cute chick in a bikini……..I want to be “holy shit, that chick is banging”. Are you ready for that? I do have some secrets for comp dieting as well as the basic going lean diet available if you should need it.

So, if you are ready to eat cold food on the go, bust nuts, wear plastic high heels and a sparkly bikini, and tan like a freak……..hit me up and let me know!

I got to the gym, started to load up my bag and suddenly it hit me…..no friggin Superpump250. I had taken it out of my bag and I usually keep it in the car.  I’m sitting there actually contemplating going home, but traffic was a bitch getting there, so I decided to just try it without.  They sell some stuff there another NO product, so I bought a bottle for $3. I was hopeful that I would get something out of it. I did get a decent pump, but nothing like the pump I crave and am most likely to see on chest and tris day.  I did have energy, but thats just me being me. What a waste of $3! I will make sure it doesnt happen again, even though I need to cycle off for a couple weeks, but not just yet.

I added something new to my chest day.  The incline bench press.  I use the incline sit up bench and put it under the bar on the smith.  I can bench pretty good on it and get 105 easy.  My regular bench is still 145.  I may have to try to break it if I can get a spot.  I will try for 150 as at 145 I can get 5 or 6 reps.

Im loving the cable crossovers on the low cables. I take out the handles and just hold the stopper balls in my hands……only balls that have been in my hand in a long time,……….but thats another story for another time….hahaaaa.  I started with just 10 lbs and am up to 25 on each side after a couple weeks time.  I also did…….

shoulder presses on smith 85

db flies 25

fly machine 110

tri press downs on cables, single arm and v bar

single arm  crossover on the high cables 70 lbs

bench dips 25 in between sets

I did some seated calf raises and slide calf raises

I used the assisted chin machine as I want to be able to do more, so I need to work up my shoulders a bit better, plus assisted I can get a better burn and really start to sweat.  Im not much of a ’sweater’. I also do unassisted dips and usually just go to 20.  I also did chest/tri dip machine.  I find this really targets the pectoralis minor and the tris at the same time. (I have to start using my lingo to practice for the PT exams someday.)

It was a good workout, I can’t really complain much. My dad is a little better.  It’s pneumonia, but I think there may be other factors because he did have a seizure and stopped breathing.  I will go visit him tonight because they took out his tube and he is awake a little my brother tells me, though still sedated.  thanks for all your well wishes!! Let me know if anyone of you ever need anything, seriously. (okay, except stuff that costs money…..cus I don’t have any!)

Talk to you later!